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How often do you talk?
My poor DW... She is completely annoyed with me because I won't stop talking about the TTC process. I have so many questions and concerns and I feel like we both need to be involved in learning about it. She could go on with no discussion about it until we actually inseminate; I, on the other hand, need to talk to her and have her hear my concerns. I don't bring it up all the time, but when I do, she is short with her answers.
I know she is worried about MC, a couple of her friends have been through that recently. She also knows I went into labor when I was 5 months pregnant with my daughter, that is another concern for her. I'm wondering if she doesn't want to talk about it because she is worried something bad will happen...
How often did/do you and DP talk about TTC issues?
Re: How often do you talk?
We talk regularly (daily, I'd say) now that we are in the thick of things. Before we got close to our first IUI, though, we didn't talk incessantly about it... that's what I came on here for!
That said, have you asked her what her hesitancy is regarding talking? Is she overwhelmed or scared or what? I'd definitely start that conversation, as I think talking about how to communicate during the process is almost as important as talking about the process itself, if that makes any sense.
IUI #3 gave us the best 2nd anniv. gift ever: 2 babies! (born 03/09/10)
Peanut and Little Man are getting so big! 2 years old already!
finally blogging again at This Will Be: An Adventure
She says "It's my way of dealing with things... I tend to keep things to myself if I'm nervous, scared, excited, sad... Stuff like that."
I suppose I shouldn't take it too personally but how do I involve her without overwhelming her?
Two Mommies Healing Hearts
We discussed it all the time while S was trying. She would need a break from from time to time and I would try to honor that. It kind of ebbed and flowed depending on how we were feeling and where we were in the cycle.
I suppose you could just ask her how much she wants to know or wait for cues that she is ready to talk more.
Sometimes you need to find a happy medium. Before, when we were still pretty far from TTC, I would go through phases, where I'd want to talktalktalk about it for a week or two, and then I'd be able to get my mind off of it for a bit. Sometimes C would have a hard time, because it was just too far in the future for her to talk/think/obsess about that much.
Now that we are closer, we talk about it pretty regularly.
I would have a conversation with your DW about how you feel. I remember way back saying to C, "Sometimes I have to talk about it, or look at baby things online - it's not because I'm trying to rush anything, I just need that outlet" And she understood. I would try not to overload her with babybabybaby all the time, but she understood when I needed to talk about it.
But I think once you're getting started - there's no escaping the fact that it's going to come up in a lot of conversations. I think it's important to talk together about her worries.
sahm ~ toddler breastfeeder ~ cloth diaperer ~ baby wearer