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How do I say this nicely?
From the day we got married my husbands cousin (in her 40's, really 2nd cousin) has been non stop with asking us when we are having a baby. I mean everything from her card to how she signed our signature frame has said "make a baby". Now I know she's doing it innocently but it's really annoying.....We plan on waiting a while and I really hate when people do that b/c god knows we would love to have a baby right now but we are trying to make sure we have everything in order first.
I've said a few times to her that we are waiting until other things fall into place and told her that I don't even plan on telling anyone when we do start trying and jokingly told her to stop pressuring us. Well today she sends me a message on facebook welcoming us back from our trip and commenting on my nieces pictures and then says "makes you want one doesn't it, so when you having one".
It seriously getting on my nerves!!! We are very close with her and her family and I don't want to come off rude but it's ALL the time and I shouldn't need to tell her why we want to wait. What else can I say?
Sorry for the vent, I just don't know what else to say to her to get her to back off......even when we start tyring I know it can take a while and I don't want her constantly asking us when. Help!!
Re: How do I say this nicely?
Tell her that you will consider having a child when you are both comfortable with his choice to be bi-sexual.
I told my MIL that and the pure shock value alone shut her up.
The BNOTB board may have some good responses for you as well as the GP boards.
"We'll get around to it" was always my response, but I didn't have pressure like yours.
How about something like, "Just cause you ask, doesn't make it happen any quicker. Ha -- just practicing my mom lines. But, seriously, it will happen when it happens."
Sucks that she's so annoying about it. What if you were having issues and had to look at "Make a baby" every day on your signature frame. That would piss me off.
The, "You first." Shuts people up pretty quickly.
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The, "You first." Shuts people up pretty quickly.
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The, "You first." Shuts people up pretty quickly.
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Ugh...people...my H and I get that more and more from his family these days. It is mainly extended relatives who we wouldn't ever tell about TTC in the first place. I just started saying "oh that is kinda a personal decision that we will make when we are ready but for now we are enjoying each other as a married couple."
I just think it is so rude for people to ask that and I mentioned the "it is personal" part bc it isn't something we are going to discuss with people even when we do decide to TTC.
ETA: oops....this computer signed me in with my knot name...this is Krista&Alex btw
Yay Nest....way to freak out.
Sorry for the multiple posts...
We hear it ALL THE TIME, mostly from my H's side of the family. We were the first one my H's cousins to actually get married before having kids... a few others have kids with no marriage. So, I guess ppl just assume that we're going to have kids now. H's grandfather just says "I'm waiting" everytime we see him.
We've even had friends of H's parents ask us. I don't know if they're just trying to make conversation or what, but it's a little much.
I'm always honest, saying we want to wait and enjoy being a couple, having some selfish time and travelling as much as possibel.
We have been pretty luck in regards to "the question" I just tell people, after we buy a house, after the renovations are finished, after we have x amount of money, (whatever project is next) that works pretty well for me. I also will through in a "about 9 months after the sperm meets the egg" response.
I was talking to a friend and she said, "you never know what people are going through as far as TTC. Whether it be months of TTC, unable to get pregnent, or loss of a baby. That is a very hurtful question. I would never ask anyone that." This should be your responds
Hopefully my response this time got it through her head but I doubt it....I also plan on telling NOBODY (ok maybe thenest girls) when we are trying b/c I don't need people watching my every move. I get they are excited but like everyone said...how do they know that we aren't trying and having problems. That's what worries me b/c when we do start trying I might flip out if I get asked this every month. Even my mother in law will say "so what month do you think you will get pregnant, I saw some cute maternity clothes".....like does she seriously think I would tell her or that we have an exact month set.
Ha, at this point I might not even tell them when I'm pregnant...I might just vanish for 9 months until the baby is born b/c they'll probably drive me nuts the whole time with what I should and shouldn't do
This is a good answer.