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how do you handle....
eating out at restaurants and dealing with DH or family's diet? Ok, two different questions and primarily for those who are eating local/organic/non-GMO/etc food and grocery shopping.
When you go out to a restaurant - how do you make selections? if you are vegetarian do you just say, ok, I don't know where this food is coming from, probably not organic, but I need to eat... We have a fair amount of restaurants in our neighborhood that source their food organic or local - but we go to a lot of different restaurants. how do you feel about this? thoughts? approaches?
When you are eating with other family/households - and you know that they are not sourcing their food as you would, do you again just suck it up and eat the food? have you had converstations with your close family about your eating/lifestyle changes? I feel that there is this fine line between enjoying family gatherings/meals and not offending their own food shopping habits and yet still being able to stick to your beliefs/eating habits.
DH is completely supportive of me being a vegetarian (probably more likely pesco-veg) - but I love love love to cook. and I feel like I can still enjoy eating meat as long as I know it is local and organic. Anyone else feel this dichotomy?
Re: how do you handle....
I answered this a little in my ginormous 'what I don't eat' response, but I'm not as strict going out or at other people's houses. I can't say I have hard and fast rules for how I deal with restaurants and such, I just try to make the best choices possible.
Whenever I can, I try to eat at restaurants that source locally and sustainably, which is pretty popular around here. The closest place for me to eat at lunch (although 99% of the time I bring my own) serves local, grass-fed beef. Now the burger buns...they're probably full of corn syrup.
You can't win 'em all!
If not sourced locally and sustainably, I try to make the best choices. Restaurants will often say where their meats come from (at least here). US grown shrimp is a pretty ethical choice. Wild fish as well. There are also usually vegetarian options or options where meat is minimal.
As a guest in someone's home, there's little I won't eat, with a smile. I don't have allergies and I'm not a vegetarian. Most of my friends know my preferences and most of my friends shop locally anyhow. They're excited to tell me that X we are having is from the local produce stand.
These are pretty much one meal situations. If everyone mostly ate at home and tried to make good choices at home, it would make a huge impact. We don't have to be perfect all the time.
I'm single and don't have family locally, so that's a challenge I don't have to face!
and I feel like I can still enjoy eating meat as long as I know it is local and organic. Anyone else feel this dichotomy?
Yes, but I don't really feel like its a contradiction. I'm glad to support farmers with better practices. Organic and local is great, and you can often find out more about local companies. Grass-finished is ideal, which means it doesn't go to a feedlot.
I still eat less meat, which is good because its expensive!, but I don't feel bad about the meat and animal products I eat.
I basically don't worry about it. I am a veg. so I don't have to worry about the meat at all. Most of the restaurants around here aren't too organic/local friendly, although there are a few. Oh well sicne we eat out pretty rarely anyway.
I will NOT let DS eat nasty meat products no matter what, though. He will not get bologna or a hot dog or anything like that, period. It just grosses me out too much. If I offend my host/hostess, oh well (it hasn't happened yet).
It is harder for me in situations where we are sharing food with other people. Like over xmas we went on a big family trip, and the grocery costs were going to be split at the end of the trip. Well, I obviously would prefer to have at least all organic dairy and eggs, if nothing else. But is it fair for me to jack up the cost of everyone elses's grocery share, when none of them care if their milk is organic?
I'm a vegetarian, don't eat soy or cheese from cow's milk, try to avoid GMO's, eat organic, etc. DH and I go out to eat maybe 1 or 2 times a month so I don't have to worry about that so much. When we do go out, we're fortunate to have some very good locally owned restaurant options where they use local, sustainable ingredients and always have at least a couple veggie meals. We go out to eat with DH's family every now and then and they always pick Timberlodge or Outback. I eat before we go and get a small salad that I kind of poke around at and eat a few bites so I don't draw attention to myself.
When we go to someone's house to eat, I'll eat whatever they're serving to be polite. It's pretty rare to go somewhere and have absolutely no meatless options - even if it's just a salad. I always offer to bring something as well to be polite and to make sure there's something there that I can eat. DH family makes an effort but I think it's hard enough for them to comprehend not eating meat and then to add soy and cheese....it's just too much and I don't think they know where to begin. I think DH has talked to his mom about our food choices but I can't be sure. I haven't specifically said anything to her but if she asks where I got something I tell her I made it or I'll answer questions about where we shop, etc. I can't really explain it but his family isn't the type that is open to stuff like that or the type who would want to have a conversation about it.
My family, on the other hand, knows exactly what I think about food. I talk to my mom and sister a lot about it and they're open. My sister has actually made some serious food changes. My mom does when it's convenient or when I'm coming over for a meal.
Tired after a long morning of hiking and swimming.
Being new vegetarians (since July), DH and I have had some trouble eating at other people's houses. When we go out to eat we choose restaurants with lots of veg options, usually Indian, Thai, or Italian. There aren't really any restaurants around us that source their food locally or organically. We do have 1 completely veg restaurant which is awesome. But when friends choose the restaurant, we usually have a choice of 1, maybe 2 veg options so we can't be picky about where those options came from or how they were grown.
When eating at people's houses, we usually offer to bring something so that we know we'll have something to eat. For example, DH's best friend threw a BBQ a few months ago, so we brought our own veggie burgers and beer for everyone to share. However, I do admit, the fact that DH's best friend and her boyfriend don't eat veggies at all makes me want to have dinner with them less and less. We can't have them over for dinner because they don't eat vegetables. At all. For them, dinner is a steak and a baked potato. Or burgers and frozen fries. That's it. They won't eat salad, green beans, sweet potatoes, tofu, squash...no veggies or fruit at all. So we haven't hung out with them really since we went veg. DH and I are happy to make compromises, like a meal with chicken and tempeh fajitas, but they keep asking "are ya'll still doing that vegetarian 'thing'?" Umm yes. It's how we're going to be from now on. I wish they would accept it so we could spend more time together.
My parents have been pretty good about having robust side dishes, like fried rice for a Chinese-type meal, so that DH and I can eat. DH's father and stepmother do the same. That's really nice of them and we appreciate it. In order to have local food at their homes, I usually ask my mom or stepmom what they're making, and bring what local ingredients I have. So if they're doing Italian, I'll offer to bring fresh pasta, garlic, and herbs, which all happen to be from our Farmer's Market. So we're being hospitable and eating locally at the same time.
ETA: I bring my own lunch 99% percent of the time. My coworkers often invite me out to lunch with them, and if it's someplace I don't like to eat at, like Pollo Chicken or burgers, I politely decline with "thanks but I brought my own lunch today." I do join them if they're going to Chipotle, Noodles & Company, or Panera since they have lots of veg options. I also despise restaurants where everything is disposable, so I really prefer Noodles since they have real plates, silverware, and cups. I love Chipotle for their local food sourcing, but everything but the baskets is disposable. Blech.
I consider myself a vegetarian-pescatarian/clean eater- but I also just happen to love FOOD. I come from a family of foodies. So I try to take an approach of, what I call, "80/20"- 80% of the time I eat clean, eat organic, eat vegetarian, etc. 20% of the time, I allow myself some indulgences- simply because I love food-
I am very lucky that my family and friends eat the same way- we are conscious eaters but love to prepare and eat good food. DH's family, however, is from the Midwest ( no offense to midwesterners), where they eat meat and cheese. I never lecture them, I just simply eat whatever I can that is the best choice when we visit them. Lately, now that we're well into the marriage, when we visit them, we stop at the grocery store on our first day of our visit and make sure we stock the house with food that we eat- they have never gotten offended by that. I guess I'm lucky with my ILs.
In terms of going out to eat- we are very lucky that we live in a small, progressive community that has an abundance of restaurants/bistros that get their ingredients from our local farms and have smart menu items and it would be more difficult to find something not local/organic at our restaurants.
So I'm rambling, but to be honest, I just try to be flexible in my lifestyle because that's what works for me- an 80/20. But to each their own.
80/20 is definitely how I've been realizing I need to approach it. We order out lunch at work everyday - so while I have control over where we order from, it's still impossible to find 5 + different restaurants that meet the organic/clean food bill, my co-workers, albeit healthy, eating preferences and price/convenience.
thanks so much! all of the info has been really helpful. I love food too! and realizing a lot of the foods I took for granted/appreciated are now going onto the 'do not eat' list. sigh.....it's been a tough journey, but one that I feel is necessary, especially with the baby on the way!