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Condoms only? Kinda long post.
I am wondering how many people use condoms as their only form of birth control and how effective it has been?
Let me give you back-story: Once upon a time, I was on the nuvaring and it was AWESOME. Oh, how I loved it! And then I started to get a headache on day 14. Not just a headache, but a killer-knock-you-out-stay-in-bed-all-day-and-do-not-even-think-about-doing-anything-else. But it was only once a month, so I figured it was worth it. Then my headaches starting lasting longer, up to three days at a time. And happening more frequently, sometimes three instances in one month. So there were times when I was in bed unable to even read a book 10 days out of the month. While this is going on, I'm also having crazy mood swings, feeling extremely anxious, and having no desire for sex. at. all. This was this most disturbing thing as I, really, truly love sex. I was always the one to initiate and suddenly I did not want to have sex at all except for about three days out of the month when the nuvaring was out and I was on my period.
My poor husband, the sex crazed, happy go lucky, I'll try anything once, girl that he married no longer wanted sex at all but would through him a bone MAYBE once a week and would panic at the thought of doing anything new or different.
Went to my doctor, she said there was no way my BC was causing any of the above. It was at this point that I just snapped. I just couldn't live not being me anymore. I took the nuvaring out. That was in October. Since then, I have had one headache that made me stay home in bed since then. I have completely gone back to normal.
Since I went off, we have been using condoms and only condoms. We have no desire to have children at all, and to be perfectly honest, I would be VERY happy to never have kids at all. So it's a little nerve racking to only use condoms. I went to see a gyno who agreed with me that all of my crazy behaviours were probably side effects of the nuvaring. We talked about getting on an IUD and scheduled a consult. Well, then I got online and heard about all of the horrible experiences some women have had with IUDs....and promptly chickened out and canceled my consult. I really, REALLY do not want to get pregnant. If that were to happen it would be absolutely devastating. I don't want to be a mommy. At the same point, I really, really do not want to go back to the crazy, scared, sick thing that I was while on birth control. So, we use condoms. Every time. He pulls out the instant he finishes and we hope for the best.
Has anyone else had any similar experiences? Have you only ever used condoms? One birth control do horrible things to you and another was perfectly fine? I'm really not interested in hearing about natural family planning because honestly I think it's a bunch of bull and really limits spontaneity. Please don't flame. I'm entitled to my opinions same as you are entitled to yours.
Re: Condoms only? Kinda long post.
I have horrible reaction to BCP so we use condoms for now, although I'm considering getting an IUD.
Condoms work if you use them correctly. They can be annoying, and you have to stop in the middle of things to put it on, but it's really not a big deal.
What about a diaphragm for you?
Condoms are quite effective.........but even with perfect use aren't 100% effective.
If I was dead positive that I didn't want kids, I'd need something more reliable than condoms. And I'd get tired of the hassle/cost of them as well........I mean, are you really looking at a lifetime of using them?
I would really rethink the IUD. You went looking for horror stories and guess what - you found some. But the reality is that thousands of women have IUDs with absolutely no problems or horrible experiences. You found the handful of women who had a bad experience..........but the thousands of women who love their IUDs don't make webpages about it for you to find.
There's also a procedure called Essure. I don't know too much about it, but it's a permanent form of sterilization for women that doesn't require surgery. You might want to ask your GYN about that.
Honest opinion - I would only rely on condoms/withdrawl only if I was ok with the idea of getting pregnant and it was going to be short term. There are so many more reliable options out there to choose from.
I thought of this as well. When ever you go looking for information in general, the people with the bad experiences are always going to be the loudest. Here was what really discouraged me though: Mirena contains hormones, a small amount but it is still there. I obviously have issues with extra hormones. Paraguard frequently causes more intense cramping and of a longer duration. Guess what? I originally started on BC (before ever having sex so I had no worry about children then) because the cramps during my period were intense. The wake you up in the middle of the night crying because they hurt so bad kind. I've had cramping since coming off of nuvaring, but not as bad as it was.
The diaphragm has an even less success rate than condoms. It also involves waaay too much preplanning. My husband and I are young and want to enjoy life. Having to plan ahead of time or stop and put in something so time intensive it a major kill-joy.
If I remember correctly from my discussion with my doctor, the hormones in an IUD stay in you ute, unlike bcp/ring which travels throughout your body. I have problems with hormonal methods as well but my doctor suggested Mirena because it wouldn't have the same effect.
I agree with this. I find it very selfish for a man to just let a female get all worked up and have so many issues with BC then do nothing. I would both talk to your doctor and talk to a urologist about a vasectomy. its rather simple, its in and out.
That's interesting. I had not heard about that. In my mind, hormones is hormones. How does it not travel through your body? The nuvaring hormone's were in one particular part of my body and it managed to wreek havoc on my body, but maybe there is something different there.
I would love for him to get a vastectomy. But because we are still early 20's, (we're babies, I know!) he's not ready to say for sure that he does not and never will want a child one day. I can't blame him. While I have no maternal instincts whatsoever, he has more than enough parental instincts for the both of us. Even if I were to ever break down and give him a child we have discussed that we only want one, that he will get snipped after one said child, and even if that child were to materialize neither of us want it to happen for at least another 6-8 years. Frankly, he and I both want to be able to enjoy our twenties without the extra stress and anxiety that a little bundle of joy can bring with it.
I am not sure why, but I think the hormones in the IUD have a very different effect than the ones in the Ring. I have a serious blood disorder where my blood clots too easily, so any estrogen that goes through my blood stream is OFF limits! I know I can't have the Nuva Ring, but I can have an IUD. So I don't know what the difference is, but that's what my gyno told me, so there must be something!
I read those horror stories before my IUD, too. However, I had a few friends that had them, and they had no problems. I know girls who love Nuva Ring, and it was a horror for you! All I'm saying is that you may want to reconsider. I really like my IUD. I don't have a period any more (which I like!) but I do get cramps once a month. They aren't fun cramps, I've always had bad ones, so I pop Advil like crazy for 2 days. Talk to your doctor about your fears; remember, that's why they go to medical school, to help YOU!
Good luck!
With an IUD it is inserted into the Uterus, depending on the type it may or may not have hormones and the intention is to attract the sperm to the IUD and prevent them from entering the fallopian tube. The ring is set in place right at the cervix and the hormone is evenly absorbed from there - effecting it's closest neighbord - your Ovary, tho the hormone will go into your blood. With the actual pill you are ingesting the hormones, in a higher dose all at one time, right into your stomach and into your bloodstream, like nutrients from your food. There are many kinds of pills, some estrogen only, some progeserone only etc, some a mix. And they effect everone differently. Its quite a crap shoot really.
i'm mostly terrified of the ring because i hear some women experience vaginal leakage OR dryness.. i love my sex lif and don't want to dry up on him! But I love my sex life and don't want to have babies either..
decisions decisions decisions
My husband and I use only condoms because birth controls made my period go crazy-- 14-17 days a month with a period! No thank you. We've gone 8 months (tomorrow) with condoms being the only reliable birth control method we've used. So far so good-- no babies. Eventually we want kids so it wouldn't be terrible if we had one. Hard financially, but we'd manage.
That sounds like an even worse way to prevent kids then just going ahead and using a condom everytime...
Condoms aren't full proof. What happens if it broke, then what? If you guys truly don't want kids you need to find another option. At least with an IUD you won't have to be concerned about that variable happening. Maybe you should read up on FAM to see if that would work for you.
I have the copper IUD..no hormones!!! Maybe this is something for you to look into.
GL!
I could have written this post several years back!
By the time I hit 30 (I'd been on and off oral BC since age 17) I just couldn't handle regular BC pills anymore. I tried the Nuvaring and while I liked the concept of it, I did not like turning into a homicidal psychopath who couldn't stand to be touched! I'm the same as you; I've always been a very sexual person and the idea that I hated the thought of sex made me terribly depressed.
I looked into an IUD at age 31. I knew I didn't want the Paraguard (copper, non-hormonal one) because I didn't want heavier periods. Mine were already bad enough! The Mirena uses progestin (I'm pretty sure!) and this hormone is not the kind you usually find in regular BC pills and the Nuvaring. If I remember correctly, most oral bc is estrogen based?
Anyway, my Dr. gave me a month of progestin bc pills to try out and see how my body felt. I had no ill effects from it, so I was ready to get the Mirena IUD. Insertion was horrible, but I'm really glad I have it. Like you, DH and I do not want children. When I got my IUD, we made a deal; when my 5 years was up, he'd get the snip. However, after 3 years, I have virtually no period at all, and if I do get cramps, they are very, very mild. I may get another Mirena inserted when my 5 years is up.
One of the things that really helped me make my decision about the IUD was talking to my doctor. She had an IUD, and she said almost all of her female doctor friends of child bearing age also had them. That convinced me!
Do some research about them, they are really quite useful!
chart
BFP: 6.13.11 - EDD: 2.20.12 - Natural M/C: 6.22.11 at 5 weeks 3 days
There are birth control pills that contain estrogen and progesterone and there are those that contain progesterone only. None of them have estrogen only; it's actually not safe to take estrogen only without progesterone unless you have had a hysterectomy.
The Mirena has a progesterone in it, and many people do not have any side effects from the hormone because it mainly works locally in the uterus and such a limited amount would be absorbed into the bloodstream.
If you're really worried about hormones, then the Paragard is hormone-free. IUD's are really a great form of birth control, and I don't know why they're not used by more women.
Personally, I have the Mirena and I love it! I didn't really have problems with BCP's(other than forgetting to take them) so I can't really say that I noticed much of a difference. I wasn't willing to have heavier periods with the Paragard(nonhormonal) IUD, so I went with the Mirena.
OP, please don't insult NFP/FAM. If you don't want to use it, that's fine - no one here will try to make you. But calling it, "a bunch of bull" is insulting to those of us who do choose it and are quite happy with it.
You don't see me coming on here saying that BCP, IUD, condoms, etc. are a bunch of bull, even though I wholeheartedly believe they are.
I think I like you!!!! : )
OP: FAM introduces NO chemicals in your body or needs any procedures for it to work. Women track their Ovulation cycle to GET pregnant so you can just do it in reverse.
i use FAM but that's only b/c it wouldn't be the end of the world if i got pregnant. honestly if i was very against not getting pregnant there's no way i'd rely on just FAM. but maybe read the book and see how your most fertile days are when your cervical fluid is thick and just avoid sex on those couple of days all together and then use condoms or whatever on the other days. i've used the foam before too and that's not bad. and you put it in before you start anything b/c it takes like 30 minutes to start working. and just stay away from your "fertile" days. i hope this helps a little bit
I'm considering doing the Essure procedure. It's basically a small insert that is put into your fallopian tubes and causes permanent blockage.
DH was originally going to get snipped, but then one of his buddies who got a vasectomy a decade ago impregnated his wife and now DH is a little freaked out by the idea.
http://www.essure.com/Home/Understanding/WhatisEssure/tabid/55/Default.aspx
Here's a link, in case anyone is interested.
Is it a bird? A plane? NO! It's SUPER SPERM!!!