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*~*Confessions*~*
Wanna do some?
1. I bailed on a gtg yesterday. I didn't set out to but it worked out that way. I felt a little bit bad but not too bad.
2. I'm painting letters for Alyssa's room and although it's so much fun, I'm not 100% sure I love what I've done.
3. I wish I had the motivation to get my body back to the way it was pre-pregnancy. But so far, I'm enjoying yoga just for being there. I'm not pushing myself the way I used to and I'm a little disappointed in myself for that.
4. I think about being pregnant again a lot. I don't want to be right now, and have no plans to be again anytime super soon, but I do think about it a lot. I wonder, Can I do that again? Will it be as good an experience again, will it be as easy again, will I get all swollen again and not be able to breathe or sleep? I wonder how it will be different the 2nd time around.
5. I talked to a colleague last night. I can't believe some of the things we talked about.
Re: *~*Confessions*~*
I am actually looking forward to going away this weekend and don't feel that guilty leaving Tim and Ryan for 3 days. I have been stressed beyond belief and need the break and relaxtion and girl time.
1. I, also think about being pregnant all the time lately. But I"m really nervous and scared to have another baby!
2. I'm feeling very excited and uneasy about house hunting, and mortgages. We are currently waiting to hear from our mortgage guy on how much we can ge financed for!
3. I'm really nervous about owning my own home.
4. I have a secret crush on Michael Phelps!
5. I'm going to be changing jobs soon and I"m not sure how I feel about it...
1. I hate being a SAHM. I know I should feel lucky and all that crap, but I really don't like it. One bit. At all.
2. I have an insane fear of getting pregnant again. Which brings me to #3.....
3. I use Kate as my "birth control reminder". Every night at 8:30pm, DH gets her ready for bed and I hug her good night. Then, I pop my birth control pill.
4. I didn't BF Cassidy because I didn't want to. Plain and simple. I wanted to drink. I wanted to take Xanax. I didn't want to be tied down like that. I hate the way my boobs felt when they were all full. So, she's formula fed because I'm selfish and lazy. Funny thing....I don't feel guilty one tiny bit!
I'll go along with the post above me..
1. I am not loving the idea of being a SAHM again. I was a SAHM with the two youngest and I went bananas. I think I am going to try to pick up some night time work near the new house and work 4 or 5 hours a night after DH gets home.
2. I also am not going to BF because I do not enjoy it. I tried with 2 and 3 and absolutely HATED it. I hated the responsibility of being "tied down" persay. I applaud all you women out there who do it, but I am just too selfish and lazy. I also do not feel guilty about it. Is that bad?
3. As much as I know we could NEVER have another child, I really want to keep trying for a girl. Four is our limit. Kids are expensive and I dont know how we are going to do this, but I wish i could have my little girl. I should be happy with the children that I do have. They are healthy and fun and smart little boys. Why push luck?
That's it for now..
ohh ohh I wanna confess today....
I miss my girl friends. I really do. Since DH and I have been married I spend less and less time with just the girls. Come to think of it I can't remember the last "just girls" thing I did. It used to be if I was "down" or needed to vent I'd call one of my girls and just chat away until I felt better. And we'd go out and do stuff all the time. DH and I got into a tiff the other day and I was irritated and it dawned on me that I really don't talk to anyone anymore. It's partially my fault, as life gets in the way, but at the same time most of my ladies are super busy with their own lives. I think part of it to is when you get married, "your" friends and "his" friends become the friends of both of you... so I kinda have been bummin about this, mostly today for some reason.
I'm with you. ?And it's really hard for me, especially because any time I've vented or had a "confession"/Flame-free Friday, there's almost always someone who has something to say to me- like I'm never allowed to say something I'm feeling without someone jumping on me or trying to make me feel worse. ?So I am trying to be the bigger person and not say a word to someone on here, even though I feel sick after reading it. ??
There, that's my confession. ??
Well, hopefully your "confessions" are not about me but if they are then so be it. After reading thru them all again, there are two of us who i think they could be about. I was just being honest! I guess some people need to think before they are "honest" around here.
1. As much as I cannot wait to have another baby at some point, I wonder if I will be able to handle it. Everyone tells me I am such a good mother to Austin (my dad told me that the first time today which made me feel great), but sometimes I don't see it and just think I should be striving to be a better mother than I am.
2. I can't wait to use my spa GC to have time to myself.
3. If I ever have another baby, I will probably just FF, I have found BFing far to stressful since I am the sole provider or food for Austin.
4. I miss my best friend in CT and wish that she lived closer to me, just so we could hang out more.
5. I've never gone to a movie or restaurant by myself and wish I had the courage to do so.
1. I spent too much money at Kohl's today. I justify this by having a 30% off coupon
2. On that note: I bought all shirts cause I cannot bring myself to buy the pant size I am in right now...UGH.
3. I love when Baby Jack takes a nap...it is so nice to have Mommy time!
!. I really want to call in sick to work tomorrow because some people there annoy me to no end. I am expected to be in meetings all day and still somehow manage to get all of my patient seen.
Nope, it was the one about taking Xanax and wanting to drink. ?It's none of my business which way people choose to feed their baby or whether you SAH or work outside the home. ?It's just that I'm sensitive to this being that I got JUMPED all over for having had ONE drink in the months after having my son, and then had a prescription painkiller that I only took a handful of times (when Ben had already been fed and put down for the night and I was in tears from so much pain from my nerve issues)... I was pretty much called an alcoholic and drug addict.
The thing is, I took Xanax a few times in order to fly on a plane and it KNOCKED. ME. OUT. ?So I worried a little to think this poster was taking this while taking care of her kids and possibly mixing alcohol in to the mix. ?But she never said when she takes this stuff and I know it's not any of my business. ?But yeah, it touched a nerve, because if I had made a post like this, I wouldn't have gotten support, I would have been jumped all over. ?That's all. ??
Confession posts are always controversial. ?Ugh.?