Boston Nesties
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
2nd Cat
I'm thinking of getting a 2nd cat. Here's why: We ADORE our current cat, but she doesn't love me back. I know I sound like a lunatic, but my H bought her right around the time we started dating, so it was HIS cat until we moved in together. She loves him more (yes, I'm acting 12!) and follows him everywhere. So I want another one who will love me like that 
Also, a less psycho reason for wanting another one is that we are out of the house A LOT and I want her to have someone to play with. Our cat is 5 years old though and I'm nervous she won't be ok with this change and I'm not really sure how to introduce a new pet into the mix. Any advice?
Re: 2nd Cat
We have two cats, but we got them at the same time around 3-4 months of age.
How active is your cat? If she isn't very playful or active I'd recommend not getting a kitten. It may be best to adopt a cat around the same age. You could talk to a shelter about the situation. Maybe they'd be able to do a house visit to see how your cat interacts with other felines.
My parents have two cats. They got Pishou in June of '02 and then Charlie in October of '02. When Charlie came into the mix, Pishou was less than pleased, even though they were from two separate litters of the same mother (different father). She would hiss and stay away but after a while they got used to each other. I think one thing that was advised was to mix their kitty litter with each others, something about the smell, since they were both from the same mother. Although it probably won't help if the cats you get are from two different mothers and fathers.
After a while they just got used to each other. Maybe let them roam free when you are home to see how they interact with each other and if it looks like they're hostile, put them in separate quarters when you're away. I'm sure after a while, they should get comfortable together. And it is definitely a good idea to get your cat someone to play with (gently, haha) so that she won't make a mess of the rest of the house.
GL!
Also, with having an older female cat, especially if she's even a little territorial towards your H, I would go with a male cat. Just make sure they are both fixed, and you shouldn't have too much of an issue.
Two is definitely better than one- when I was looking at adopting kittens, we wanted two so they would have company when we were at work. I wound up getting a "birthday gift" from a friend; her friend's cat had a 2-kitten litter and we ended up with twin boys.
P.S. Our cats are not related at all and they took a number of days for them to stop hissing at each other.
ETA: We have a male and a female.
I don't really think kitten vs adult cat will matter much. If you get a kitten, there's less of an adjustment period for him/her whereas if you get an adult, then you have two hissing, swatting animals to deal with. However, adults are calmer, etc.
Years ago, my family had 2 cats (they were littermates) and we introduced a third when they were 3 years old (he was only 6 weeks old) and there was some hostility for a couple of weeks (nothing violent, they just hated him and hissed at him a lot). The new cat was confined to a large bathroom with his own food/water/litter when we weren't home/at night and once we knew they would tolerate each other, we stopped doing that.
And my husband knows how you feel. Our cat is almost 13 and he's been my cat since he was a kitten (he's the 6 week old in the story above) and while he likes my husband, he definitely prefers me. He follows me everywhere, always has to be close to me, sleeps next to me on the bed, etc. Poor husband is always like "why doesn't he want to cuddle with me?"
I got a second cat to keep my first cat company because she seemed lonely/always meowing so I couldn't do my schoolwork.
I had an approx. 2 yo female and I was told to get a younger female. So I got a 1 yo female. Apparently this is due to the fact that the first cat needs to feel like they are in control and still 'the boss.'
When I brought the new cat home, I opened the carrier and walked away. I had food, water, toys and a little box in the bedroom and she stayed in there for a couple of days.
We then bought baby gates so they could see each other and get used to each other. They hissed a lot and fought. After about two days, the new cat was extremely anxious to get out of the bedroom so we let her out and just monitored them.
I was also told not to leave them alone together for at least a couple of days so I would recommend doing the introductions over a weekend so they will be all set for Monday morning.
Also, don't try to force introductions. Don't pick up one of the cats and bring it over to the other. Also, make sure that YH pays a lot of attention to HIS cat and that you attempt to give the new kitty a lot of love.
GL! I used to think that my cats would never get along but now they sleep together. They still 'fight' though which I have been told is relatively normal.