Someone just tell me what to do!

LimaBeetle03

Okay, advice needed. Here goes (LONG) -

I've been in such a funk lately. I get like this sometimes, all I want to do is come home and go to bed. I can do my thing at work and be fine, but when I get home I've got nothing left. So my general attitude right now is not very good.

I signed up to do Take One for my National Boards in November. I did this because I wanted to do my National Board Certification next school year. I just found out that the state has a subsidy that could have paid my fees ($400) and put me in a support group, but no one in my district knew about this to tell me. So I paid my fees and have been going it alone. It's a very time consuming process, and I haven't had much time to work on it with all of my other work duties. I was planning on buckling down this weekend.

In the past few weeks, there has been major talks about the state cutting the $5000 stipend that I would have gotten yearly if I completed National Boards. So it's very up in the air if I'd ever see that money if I went through the process. I also found out that I can't apply for the subsidy for the rest of the program until the year after next. Basically, my plan was to do the full certification process so I could get the stipend to pay for grad school. But that's not a possibility anymore.

The certification process is INTENSE. I've hardly scratched the surface of the Take One entry I've been working on. At this point, I just don't think I have it in me to finish the entry whole heartedly. If I don't follow their guidelines perfectly, they won't even grade it. I can withdraw, but I won't get a refund. At this point, I'm pretty much over that. My problem is that the thought of giving up makes me crazy. But trying to complete it could make me more crazy.

What would you do?

mzovoce

I would do it. Just because the stipend is gone now, doesn't mean that it will be gone forever. I feel that that personal development carries over into our professional lives and vice versa.

LimaBeetle03

mzovoce:

I would do it. Just because the stipend is gone now, doesn't mean that it will be gone forever. I feel that that personal development carries over into our professional lives and vice versa.

I do want to do it, I'm just not sure that right now is the best time. I should have put A LOT more time into it before now, but yearbook took up all of my extra time. And I'm thinking maybe 5 years down the road, I'll have a lot more experience, which should make it easier.

I think at this point, I've pretty much talked myself out of it. The thought of spending the next month doing 20 pages of writing, revising, rewriting, fighting with formatting, etc. has no appeal.

Jennifer18131

LimaBeetle03:

The thought of spending the next month doing 20 pages of writing, revising, rewriting, fighting with formatting, etc. has no appeal.

I understand this 100%! But I also ditto MT. If you  really think that you won't turn in anything of quality and you'll be okay waiting another 5 years to finish, then save your sanity and have a martini.

~*Belle*~

I think maybe you need to step back and take a break and revisit it again in a few years. It sounds like it will help your career but you are still young and have many years ahead of you. When you've given yourself a break and start again someday I think you'll be better off. It's definitely not worth the stress to turn in something they may not even grade. Ditto Jennifer on the martini!

ShoeFanatic614

I was originally going to ditto MT but then I read this:

LimaBeetle03:

I think at this point, I've pretty much talked myself out of it. The thought of spending the next month doing 20 pages of writing, revising, rewriting, fighting with formatting, etc. has no appeal.

You don't want to go into something this big half-assed so I say...drink up!