Entertaining Ideas
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baby shower POLL
All my family and friends have always had a baby shower thrown for them for each baby they have had. In a post earlier someone mentioned that showers are only for the first child. That is really new to me...so just wondering what the majority of people do.
[Poll]
Re: baby shower POLL
Wow! I cant believe Ive never heard of that. Guess it's just different here in VA
I had to google this to find out if this was only something here in VA and I found this on a website about baby showers:
Who To Invite To The Baby Shower: Historically, a baby shower was only for the first born as well as there was only one shower so everyone important to the Mommy-To-Be was invited (women only). Today, many woman have multiple showers for the same baby and that it is not only for the first born anymore!
The shower is not for the baby. The shower is for the mom-to-be to help her outfit the house and the baby. Since she's already a mom for the next babies I find subsequent showers to be in poor taste.
I understand it's regional. I also understand that people want to celebrate the new babies. I just don't like multiple showers unless there are extenuating circumstances.
As a Virginian living not too far from the Beach, it's not really different living in Virginia.
Im not trying to change any ones opinion. I honestly have never heard that its only for the first baby. Every friend and family member I have, even in other towns, have had showers before each baby was born. Just the norm to me. Ive never heard of anything different. Interesting to find that other people do not do the same thing that is all
I agree with this. If it's fine within your group, it's fine.
ITA. I've been to showers for the 2nd baby before. I, personally, would not have one for the 2nd, but whatever floats mommy's boat. I don't think it's WRONG to have 2nd baby showers...every person's situation is unique and etiquette doesn't speak to the outliers, it speaks to the norm. If someone has an issue with attending a baby shower for the 2nd child, well, they don't have to attend. Ha, it kinda reminds me of one of my mom's sayings: "If you don't like it, you don't have to look."
I think it really depends on several different things: whether that's an acceptable norm in your circle of friends and families and how far apart the children are.
I personally would not spend a lot of money for gifts for 2nd child shower, like maybe $10-$15 max. But I'd spend more for the first child, maybe $75-$100 depending on how close I am with the parents to be. If people want to buy you gifts--they will do so without showers.
after several m/c, DD#1 born 7-7-08, more m/c and failed IVF, started adoption process March 2011, matched Oct 2, 2012, DD#2 born 10-31-12
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usually in my circles 2nd showers are diaper showers.
i think that if your friends or social circles have changed since prior baby showers, its fine to have another.
i think that it is fun to celebrate every pregnancy and expectant child somehow, but i never liked the after baby was born idea, i just dont think that i would want my baby around a bunch of people for at least a few months.
we did do this for my brothers gf about a month after my neice was born, because issues arose before hand and had to postpone it, it was very small though. It was logically better because i got them most of what they needed 2nd hand before baby was born, and that left only diapers and wipes for gifts. (im not saying the shower is all about gifts, im just pointing something out here...) economically it was better to have our guests spending their gift budget on diapers (which have to be bought new) versus clothes etc (which are WAY better bought used, because people dont get used items as gifts). so that $20 was a package of diapers valued at $20 instead of like 1 outfit valued at $3 used.
anyways, i also think that if there are a few years between kids or if the 2nd 3rd etc are a different father than 1st than its fine to have a full shower.
now that i think about it, 3 of the last 4 showers ive been to were NOT 1st kids but i hadnt gone to the 1st shower for some reason, so i was happy to go and shower them with love, and gifts.
I loved the idea of a "Diaper Shower" so much, that I've thrown 2 in the last 3 weeks for friends and family
To me (and especially to my best friend, who miscarried a few times since her first-born) all pregnancies and babies are a reason to celebrate. And the Mommies (as well as their guests) loved the idea of the Diaper Shower-- it's an excuse to get together, have fun, eat good food, and give the Mommy some useful stuff for the 2nd baby.
Amongst our friend group we've done large couples showers for the first baby then "sprinkles" as more of a girl outing for second babies. At the sprinkles we often bring gifts for mom / family - then food giftcards for after birth etc. We've paired the sprinkle with a mommy pampering event like brunch or a pedi afternoon.
Although I'm of the belief that a real 25+ person shower with formal invitations is a first baby only, it doesn't mean other children aren't celebrated. Personally I do the same dollar amount of a gift for the following child as well. Some things will always still be needed regardless of how many children are in a family.