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In desperate need of distraction
Ladies, we need to get some conversation going on here! The quieter it is the more I think about my little ones at home...which in turn causes my heart to weep. Knowing that all of you are so very kind and would hate to see this grown women cry I suggest we start some sort of dialog. So, I propose the following questions:
For those whose DW is carrying or will be carrying your child/ren what do you feel your biggest fear will be once the children have arrived?
For those of you carrying or plan to carry you and your DW's child/ren what is or what do you will think you need from your DW?
For those of you who already have children what is the best advice you have to offer those ttc, want to conceive in the future, or have little ones now?
For those of you fostering children how hard is bed time?
And for all of us collectively, what will be or was the first book you read to your child/ren?
Re: In desperate need of distraction
Aw, I'm sorry you're away from your little ones.
I'll play!
For those whose DW is carrying or will be carrying your child/ren what do you feel your biggest fear will be once the children have arrived? My biggest fear is financial security. We still haven't figured out exactly how it's all going to work financially. I know it will work out, but that's my biggest concern.
For those of you carrying or plan to carry you and your DW's child/ren what is or what do you will think you need from your DW? I think I will need love, support and a her presence especially during birth and the early days of parenting. I really want to ensure that she bonds with our babies and I think being there through all of that will help.
For those of you who already have children what is the best advice you have to offer those ttc, want to conceive in the future, or have little ones now? NA
For those of you fostering children how hard is bed time? NA
And for all of us collectively, what will be or was the first book you read to your child/ren? Hmmm, this is a great collection. We have quite the kid's book collection (and growing) and I fully expect to read to our babies in utero and when they're newborns. I haven't thought of the actual book though. I'll have to think some more about this one.
Sorry - it's a crazy day at work. I think until I go on leave it's going to continue to be crazy :-(
I am sorry it is so hard.
Advice? Hmm...even when it is crazy and hectic, take a second to stop and enjoy the smell of their heads, the way they nuzzle into your neck, the little sighs and coos they make. Take lots and lots and lots of pictures. Don't forget to be in the pictures. Find someone you trust enough to leave the babies with and have date night once in awhile. Accept help. Ask for help. Sleep whenever you can. Buy diapers in bulk. Buy wipes in bulk. Don't beat your/her self up about BFing - anything they get will be beneficial - but not at the risk of mental health. Formula feeding works too and is fine. Keep an eye out for post partum depression and nip it in the bud. Listen to other people. Take advice. Read books. And then do what works for your family.
I have no idea what the first book was. L read to the babies all the time in utero - but can't remember what the first out of womb book was. FWIW by favorite children's book is Time of Wonder. It doesn't have bright kid friendly pictures or cute rhymes - but I love the melodic rhythym of it and reminds me of my summers I spent in Maine. My kids love it too - they must find it very relaxing (or boring!) since they almost always fall asleep quickly when I read it.
I think me and TWB should post this on the refrigerator! Thanks!
For those whose DW is carrying or will be carrying your child/ren what do you feel your biggest fear will be once the children have arrived? I agree with the financial security thing. We're good right now but I knw that children get expensive. I just want to be abole to provide my child and wife with EVERYTHING that they will ever need!! Tha'ts the main reason we havent started TTC. I'm a little freaked out that I will be a sucky provider. We will have a 2 person income but I always feel like everything is my responsibility. I guess that makes me a control freak!
For those of you carrying or plan to carry you and your DW's child/ren what is or what do you will think you need from your DW? I know for sure that I'm going to be a difficult pregnant lady!! I'm already difficult at times and K is a SAINT for being able to deal with me and put me in my place when needed. I think what I'm going to need more than anything is ATTENTION!! lol...
For those of you who already have children what is the best advice you have to offer those ttc, want to conceive in the future, or have little ones now?
For those of you fostering children how hard is bed time?
And for all of us collectively, what will be or was the first book you read to your child/ren? Not sure yet! Open to suggestions
stupid blocked nest. i saw this post pop up in my reader but couldn't get to it since i can only get to the bump.
my biggest fear in terms of the baby was that she would connect to him more because she was BF and because she actually gave birth to him, and that i would get jealous. and...well, i do. sometimes. not often, but it happens. but, the reverse is true, too, and she says that sometimes she's jealous of the way he just smiles and smiles at me when i come home from work.
i think what i'll need is for her to understand that i deal with things and feel things differently, so just because she didn't have morning sickness or food cravings doesn't mean i won't. and that when i don't feel good i can be needy, and i'll probably need her to just go with it.
the first book i read him was goodnight moon, which i have vivid memories of my mom reading to me over and over when i was little.
and also, 2brides? i love you. that is the awesomest advice.
For those whose DW is carrying or will be carrying your child/ren what do you feel your biggest fear will be once the children have arrived? Not being able to help with feedings - especially overnight. I can see how completely exhausting it is for BFing moms and i'm worried about A feeling overwhelmed and not helped enough.
For those of you who already have children what is the best advice you have to offer those ttc, want to conceive in the future, or have little ones now? Everything 2brides said
and to reiterate: ASK FOR HELP. I've said it before, but no one benefits when one parent tries to be super mom. we all need help and help is available if you look hard enough to find it. Also, dont waste your time trying to compare yourself to other moms. Perfect the smile and nod...everyone loves to give thier opinion on babies and kids, but the bottom line is that you know your child best and what you say goes. Keep your confidence up and dont doubt your abilities and knowledge. Dont forget about your marriage. As we are teaching our children about brushing teeth and letters and numbers, we are also teaching them what it means to be a spouse - they watch and know and feel everything so be just as kind and patient with your spouse as you are with your kids. Get a babysitter. Pick your battles. Dont worry so much about your house being clean.
For those of you fostering children how hard is bed time? In the beginning it was he!! with Sprout - bed time would take hours. it would include screaming, crying, tantrums, and lots of fustration for all of us. Rinse and repeat multiple times a night due to his frequent night terrors and wakings. Fortunately as his behavior issues got under control overall, bed time also became a ton easier. Now its a nice routine for all of us. As for Rosebud? Piece of cake. We are so, so spoiled by that baby.
And for all of us collectively, what will be or was the first book you read to your child/ren? Is it bad that I have no idea? We started reading books as part of our night routine from the very first night, but he chooses the books and I dont remember what his first was! I suppose there was so much going on that first day, what book we read was the last thing on my mind.
Blogs: Our Growing Family - CT Working Moms
Ctbride08, not bad at all. As a person who came from parents who never read to me, I am just trying to see what are some of the books that children may have read to them. I love the fact that you have read so many books to them that you do not remember! I have only read one book so far and that is "Guess How Much I Love You." I really like Little Nutbrown Hare
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