A very dear friend's mother passed away yesterday after a long battle with cancer. The viewing is Wednesday and the funeral is Thursday. I really want to go since she was there for me when my dad passed but the services are in Maine. My options are take off work on Wednesday, drive 11+ hours, come back Thursday or Friday (but at that point I could make a long weekend of it and visit another friend on the way back who is going to be at their weekend place in maine). Fly and pay an obscene amount for a ticket (at least $520 according to kayak) and have to rent a car (so probably $1k with flight, car, hotel). Or send flowers and make plans to spend some time with her later (she lives in NYC).
My mom said she would go with me if I decided to drive up. I know the next week is going to be a blur for her. I am leaning towards sending her flowers and having some quality time together later but I also feel like I would be letting her down in way this week. I also have never met her family, so in a way I would feel like might be intruding. I know when my dad was sick all my time was spent between work and my parents, the same has been true for her. Sorry for the novel, this is the third really bad thing (hopefully last) that has happened this weekend so I just feel frazzled. My cousin had a brain aneurysm - she had surgery and is going to be ok (thank God) and my mom's little community had an awful awful loss.
Re: wwyd?
Denise, I am so sorry to hear about everything that has happened this past weekend. I can only imagine how hard things are for each of these families. My heart truly goes out to them during such a rough time in their lives.
Do you have the time to take off of work? Do you think she would expect to see you there? Its a tough decision. I think I would base it off of whether or not you will regret your choice if you decide not to go. A long weekend might be a nice break for you with everything you've had going on this past couple of months. Time with your Mom and time visiting with both of your friends might be nice.
I agree with Jen. If you can afford the time off, time away might be good, and you won't question your decision as much. I think your friend would really appreciate the gesture, too, even if she's in too much of a whirlwind to spend any time with you. A roadtrip is always a good time to take a step back and recharge, too.
Sorry to hear about everything that you have been going through lately. Thinking about you...
TTC since Jan 07. Dx with PCOS Jan 08
Thanks everyone. I think I am going to stay home and plan for a visit later. Stupid day job, why do I not have an unending supply of days off (and money)?
If it was closer I think I would be more up for an impromptu road trip, but it just doesn't make sense to travel 24 hours in a car or spend $1,000 on plane tickets for both of us to spend a few hours at a service. We are going to make plans to get together soon. I know after my dad passed there was this sad sense of freedom because all my free time was not consumed with his well being.