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mini vent
My H is friends with this couple that I can't really stand. They are selfish, stuck up, judgemental, and not very nice.
Since my H is friends with them, I try to be nice to them.
H called me last night and said he had something to ask me that he knows I am not going to be happy about. He said that they want me to take their family pictures tonight down by the lake. Then he said "They must think you like them." lol.
#1. I suck at taking pictures. #2. I don't want to, at all.
They said "We figure if they don't turn out good, at least we didn't pay for them."
So #3. They want me to do this for free. I don't even want money, but I have done this for them before, and I don't even think they said thank you. That really annoys me.
Thanks for letting me vent.
Re: mini vent
Ew!! That does suck!!! gosh, I don't have any advice for you on this one. Sometimes you have to grit your teeth and "take one for the team". Easier said than done I know! Is there any way you could take advantage of something THEY could do for you for free in return?? You don't suck at taking pictures either. Watch your lighting - get the light in their eyes and if it is too bright, put them in the shade looking towards the light.
something kind of similar happened to me last year. DH's aunt got married and asked me to take pictures. This was in the fall when I was BEYOND crazy busy with pictures. She is kind of drama/manipulative/etc so I always take a lot of what she says with a grain of salt and it just irritates me that I have to be on my toes with her and have to play games to communicate. Like, can't things just flow naturally? Of course she expected the pix right away and I didn't ask her to pay for them. Although she has given me a ton of clothes for Maria plus DH says that she paid for all of our flowers at our wedding (which I thought we did).
Thank you for the advice. I still remember that advice about the light ever since I was complaining about that picture I took of Noa that would have been sweet if she would have been looking toward the light.
And yes, the only reason I said ok was to essentially take one for the team, to keep things smooth between my H and them.
They have nothing they could do for us...not that I can think of anyway...and even if they did I would NEVER ask them for anything.
They do lots of things without me! I love it that way. I hate when it comes time to do "family" things together...but at least now I have Tennyson to focus on while there!
I play that card sometimes too :-)
Can you be "busy"? Can you tell them you just don't feel comfortable and aren't going to be able to do it?
I understand that sometimes you just have to do things you don't really want to do in order to keep the peace. This sounds like a situation where I just wouldn't care and would tell these friends that I'm not going to be able to do it. Maybe that makes me a bad person, but with working full time at a job that sucks, my personal time is way too valuable to give it away for people I don't even like.
Oh heck yeah - babies are a free pass to ignore everyone sometimes lol
GL with the pics
I used that card when she asked me to take pictures of her newborn. That was when I was stressing about not being able to get pregnant (you all remember that I'm sure.)
I think they were taken aback by it when I bluntly said "No way!". Hahaha.
I wish I was more like you. Unfortuntalely my bluntness has caused more drama in my H's life than I would prefer, so I try really hard to be accomodating for him now.
If I would have had more time to come up with an excuse for why I was busy, I was definitely going to go that route.
I had to go to their house a few weeks ago. I played with T the ENTIRE time. It was awesome.
I get that and think it makes you a good wife that you're willing to do this for his friends. Just tell M that he needs to make it up to you somehow--maybe with a spa day or something.
Absolutely!
That will work. I am about 6 months overdue for a pedicure! Eww.
I
Jodie at Salon 297. She gave me the best pedi ever last year.
I think maybe your H should start telling them no for you. If they are his friends, then he should field these requests.
Them: "We want Molly to take these pictures for us."
Desmond: "She only takes pictures for fun. She prefers not to have that pressure."
or
Them: "Come hang out with us this weekend."
Desmond: "Molly is busy, but maybe Annoying Husband Friend and I can go to the bar."
I am going to tell him to start doing this. Thanks!
I totally agree with LVila, though. Having your H field the requests could be your golden ticket.
I thought of one more thing: You could totally use your working mom status as an excuse, too.
"Molly works full time and really cherishes her time with T. Right now, she's not up for any extra work. She does suggest using Such&Such Photographer, though."
Ugh, how frustrating! It sounds like you got some good advice though for dealing with this.
That reminds me of MH's friends who asked him to take photos of their entire family (he's friends with two brothers, and know the parents quite well). Afterwards they bitched about the pictures and how much they sucked. Um, MH is NOT a professional photographer, and they wanted pics inside, we do not have a professional camera. Hire someone to take your picture next time, assbag cheapskates. I'm not exactly sure what they were expecting.
Holy ungratefullness, Batman!!! WTH. That would be the last time I would ever try to do something nice for those people. That is so mean and wrong. And indoor pictures are SO hard.