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2 housewarming parties?
I am usually lurking the baby boards, but I was hoping for some advice over here please.
DH and I moved into a new home in December, and now that summer is here, we would like to have a housewarming party. We live in a mini-home, so we have limited space, but we do have a new 8' x 22' deck and a realitively good sized yard. We intend to do a BBQ/potluck; Nothing fancy.
My issue is guest list. My husband is involved in Narcotics Anonymous and would like to invite some of them to the party. I am friends with these people as well. However, he ONLY wants to invite these people. He does not want to invite my family (his are in another province) or my (limited) friends, as he does not want to have to explain his recovery, or have the issue of people talking about alcohol, etc. I understand where he is coming from, as they are definitley a different group of people, but does this mean we have to have two parties all the time? We mixed some of these people at a wedding with no alcohol, and there was no issue. The other issue is my mother, which is a whole other can of worms to explain this to her 
I guess my question is, do you think this is reasonable for my husband to ask? I try my best to respect and encourage his recovery. TIA. Sorry so long.
Re: 2 housewarming parties?
For this issue, I would have the housewarming(s) on the same day. Just have the NA people come from 12-3 and the rest from 4-7. That gives you a break in between but you won't have to set everything up multiple times.
However, you can't always be separating guests lists. I would tell your husband that this time it is fine but in the future you'll have to mix crowds. I'm not familiar with those kind of groups and their procedures but I would think owning up to your past and learning to live with it and not be ashamed would be part of the deal. Maybe have him address it at the next meeting?
I love the idea of having the 2 parties on the same day. Maybe invite your more conservative family/friends over early in the day. More like a lunch... and then have your party friends over in the evening (and maybe request that your DH invite their wives also) . That way you could accommodate 2 different types of people.
And really I wouldn't stress about this... some types of people just don't get along... And really that's Ok. So just do what works for you/ your hubby/ and your friends.
Everyone has different groups of friends and even if they do get along, you don't invite everyone all the time. For big stuff like a housewarming, have two parties. But for general entertaining, our tendency is to invite a group of friends over--our college friends, my high school friends and their husbands, his family, my family, etc. Only at the big stuff is there much mixing.
Point is, I think separating groups of friends/family is totally normal. Have the two parties in one day and then leave the guest list TBD for future events.
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I agree with PP that if your DH feels so strongly about this, have both parties the same day and separate by time slot. I plan an event every year and the guest list is so big guests are given a time slot. Like PP said, have his friends come something like 1pm-3pm. I would give yourself and 2 hour window before you have the next batch of guests, just to make sure all of the previous guests leave and give you time to tidy up.
But in realtiy, you cant be doing separate parties the rest of your lives.