kind of personal

chrissie3416

DH lost his brother very suddenly on Father's day.  He is having a very difficult time with this loss.  Im struggling as to what I can do to help him.  Has anyone been in this situation that has advice?

MoxyMissi

I am so sorry to hear about your brother in law.  That is a very sad situation.  I don't have any experience with it, but the only advice I can offer would be to find a grief counselor for your DH to talk to. 

SeptemberBride'08

MoxyMissi:

I am so sorry to hear about your brother in law.  That is a very sad situation.  I don't have any experience with it, but the only advice I can offer would be to find a grief counselor for your DH to talk to. 

I'm so sorry to hear this. I would second going to a grief counselor.

ArcticFox

I'm so sorry, that has got to be really tough

You might want to look up the stages of grief to get an idea of what to expect, since they seem to be surprisingly accurate..  when I lost my mom I was basically like a zombie and I was in a haze for a while, but it is normal.  There is grief counseling and grief support groups, which might help if he wants to talk things out.  Is he working or does he have other distractions?  I don't think I really have any advice, but it does help to stay busy.  I had such demanding job, I went back to work and I was so busy, I think it kept me sane to not be dwelling on everything.  I was lucky to have great friends and family.. I think sometimes the little things can be so wonderful, like cards, little care packages, someone to keep me company, etc. 

GlenLakeLove

I'm so sorry...

I also think that if he'd like to speak with someone, a grief counselor might really be helpful for him.

tjmartin07

GlenLakeLove:

I also think that if he'd like to speak with someone, a grief counselor might really be helpful for him.

So very sorry...and I also agree about him speaking to a grief counselor.  I hope it helps him.

abba916

I'm so sorry for his loss and losing someone suddenly can be such a shock..I lost my mom suddenly in 07 and it took awhile to feel normal and even now I can smell her perfume or something and it reminds me she isnt here...I went to counseling and it helped some but the first 2 I went to wanted to medicate me..and thats just not my bag so I had to fnd someone who i could just talk to- and that made me a little depressed having to retell the story a couple of times...

honestly, for me at least, I needed time and although it never fully goes away- it does get better a little each day..

I also wrote letters to my mom for a while in the beginning...that helped some- especially while I was pregnant..

Good Luck to you and your husband- losing someone is never easy. 

abba916

oh and I wanted to add when my mother died it was on thanksgiving day and the first year after I wasnt much into celebrating..we had dinner with friends but the thought of making dinner like I had before was too much and thanksgiving is my favorite holiday after my birthday...so this coming father's day dont be too put off if your DH doesnt seem into it..even though its his day as a dad it's still a reminder (even though its not the same date.)