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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Re: am I crazy (no, for real)?
Babywearing for a 2 y/o boggles my mind. Will is 35 pounds. No.
We went out to eat with some people Lorne works with/has worked with when we were up in Monterey, and a couple with a child a little older than Will joined us. The mom carried their 2+ y/o everywhere. I couldn't understand it; Will would have wanted to walk (or RUN RUN RUN). The kid wants to walk everywhere unless he's dead tired. But she also nursed him at the table, so I think we have radically different views on parenting.
ET make more sense.
I believe by putting their babies in the other room, shutting the door, and turning off the monitor.
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Cali! I don't know if I should faint in horror or call CPS.
I'll call CPS first, then faint. That'll learn ya.
I'm beginning to think Dr. Sears is a total quack. All the scary issues they "cite" (read: fear monger) to oppose CIO (basically, that you're going to turn your child into a little sociopath if you let him/her cry) are based on studies that actually have nothing to do with CIO. Weird.
Mucho likes purple nails and purple cupcakes
Aah. I've ruined E. I didn't read a book, I don't the difference between Dr Sears and Dr Ferber. At 8 mo, I decided I had it with the lack of sleep. I put him in the crib and he went down fine, but would wake a few hours later. I turned on his sound machine, my sound machine, closed both bedroom doors and turned the audio monitor off and the video on. So, I could see him but not hear him. Took 5 days of screaming in smaller increments, but he slept. And sleeps fine now. But I totally get if some people can't do CIO. It's not for them. Great.
I hate the AP board. And the girl with the 5 carriers & carrier business cards makes me crazy.
Lindsay, most of the studies are actually watching the stress reactions of infants who had recently been orphaned by the war. I KID YOU NOT. They're using WWii studies of infant separation anxiety in extreme situations to talk about how children will turn out. I'll see if i can find the study for you. It's unbelievable.
Then again, MC has the look of a serial killer in that photo so maybe, just maybe we're both wrong.
There are a few pictures on the babywearers blog of her child's arms wrapped up. Jo would rage. She loves to run, and when she's tired its a piggy back ride for a .2 second rest or a stroller. She likes to lay down in her stroller and pass out to sleep. Its her space. She's freak if I tied her to me.
And I love TSD even more now!
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If I were a man (or fitty) I'd totally call my penis THE WIZARD - HappyTummy
I really have nothing of substance to add here. I just find it beyond comprehension how these women do it. Between the babywearing, the BFing, and the co-sleeping, when are you ever you? And when is your kid ever its own person.
I neeeeed my own space. My kid neeeeeds his own space. I find absolutely nothing wrong with that.
When Andy was an infant, he would fuss up a storm. The only thing that calmed him would be to chill out in his crib. In there, he was able to move his legs and arms, and figure out WTF those things did. I seriously wonder if these women ever give their kids the opportunity to do that.
I am a bit disappointed. I hoped all the mothers on here would want to do a music video spoof with me.
Like this one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PU84rDbdu8Q
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
I wish you could have seen the reaction on J's face to this video. Oh it was fabulous.
Lanie, I got into it with a couple APers on 3-6 last week:
http://community.thenest.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/39430773.aspx
Mucho likes purple nails and purple cupcakes
Thank you for sharing that post Lindsay. It brought joy to my morning.
"siting"
I like that people should just "google personality defects in CIO children" in order to make the 'right' decision, but you presenting an article by a person who is not anti cio is just silly. Clearly you're not a mother unless you are googling CIO horrors! Dont' google anything else!
Jacksonsmom is a bit of a tool it seems.
Also have you ever seen the baby wearers instructional videos?
Yeah. Wow.
This is the bullsh!t speaking in circles that I can't stand. The written word is "Whatever's best for your baby" but then the silent litmus test of the "right" choices are applied. But none of them will own up to the fact that there are "right" choices! It's like the Skull and Bones of motherhood.
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
it's a classic case of wanting to have their cake and eat it too. they want to maintain that they are not nuttier than a shithouse rat so they stress all these principles that to me seem like "no duh" common sense.
Yet they also seem convinced that anyone who hasn't joined Dr Sears' cult in a blood ritual is simply a dangerous ignoramus who should never be left alone with a child. The stories that are told on that board-about the posters' own parents and in laws!- are comically toe curling, as i'm sure you might guess.
A friend of mine maintains that people with older kids who are still anti-CIO just happened to be lucky and have decent sleepers. Most people I know eventually "give in" and start letting the kid CIO. And, you know what? All those kids have become decent sleepers.
And I don't espouse the whole, "whatever works for you" mantra because I judge hard core APers, I judge parents who refuse to let their kid cry and as a result have toddlers sleeping with them in the 'family bed', and I judge anyone who is still bfing when the kid has developed a basic command of language.
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
Score one for linds! Love how she didn't even respond. Gah. I get into it w/people over on the 12-24 spin off board daily. They're nutso. I swear, most people would put their kid in a giant plastic bubble suit if they could.
YOu know what is a hoot? Asking about what they do when the baby cries in the car.
You're on the highway, your baby is screaming, what do you do?
You get a lot of "well that's different!" How? Your kid is facing backwards away from you, and in a vehicle flying down the highway, this is not scarier than a cradle in their own room? Splain please. You pull off the highway and baby is asleep. She cried it out.
SUCKS FOR YOUR NEGLECTORINO! YOUR BABY CRIED IT OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT.
Of course you do get the occasional whack job who never drives anywhere and sits in the back seat of the car when her husband drives in case of this type of situation, but most just have no explanation for why 5 minutes of crying in a car is different than 5 minutes of crying in a bed.
No Lanie, it's different because you can still use your voice to soothe them and reassure them that you are there and that you'll help them as soon as it's safe. When you're at home and you've locked them in their cribjail they're all alone in their room and in the world and they know you're never coming back and you're taking every bond they have with you and ripping it apart and then peeing on the open wound. Duh.
I just read a post like this....that is NOT CIO, Lanie!
I also stumbled across one where everyone had the same problem, that their kids kept pinching them. They would say, "Ow, that hurts mommy, gentle touches instead," but the kids kept pinching and the moms just COULD NOT stop them.
I think I heard about a similar post once before. Jesus, your baby is physically hurting you and there's nothing you can do about it. ?????????
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
Oh, we read plenty with E- just no books by doctors or about sleeping and not at 2, 3 or 4am.
He screamed bloody murder in there, but I could mostly only see him standing. Eventually, he'd just slide down the side of the crib in exhaustion I guess. 60 min, 45 min, 30 min, 15 min, 5 min- ZERO.
But, I'm sure I'm the worst mom ever according to the AP'ers. Oh well.
I don't know anyone in the BW'ing "movement" in real life.
Yes fenton, hitting our mother warrants merely a warning about gentle touches.WHAT THE?
No. Hitting in our house means immediate reaction. You do not hit. You do not get warnings about hitting. You get warnings when you get too close to a glass of water or the television. You do not get warnings about hurting people. Sorry kid. you choose to hit mom, mom is going to react FAST. Luckily my babysitter is on side. She reacts quickly too.
I'm very blessed with a girl who doesn't try that anymore. I'm sure she will. BUt she has never bitten or slapped my face or tried to hurt me since she was old enough to understand. When she was like 8 months or something she'd squeeze you or pull your hair but even then it was "ok down you go."
LOL. Every time they try to explain how its different I laugh. EVERY time. "they sense your presence." Uh huh. Whatever you need to tell yourself but fact remains YOUR BABY CRIED IT OUUUUUUUUUUT! And will probably be schizophrenic. Way to go attachment parent.