Son doesn't want to go to his dad's

2carbuffs

Seems like there is something going on in every area of my life right now. First, my YS hasn't been wanting to go to his dad's since summer started. At first, I thought is was just b/c H's son was here, but he still doesn't want to go since AJ left. He says it's b/c he doesn't have anything to do there. At first, I didn't really think much about that. Kids say that all the time. But as more details came out, I realized that he literally doesn't have anything to do. And his dad is on the computer all the time, so I think he's feeling ignored. Yesterday was his dad's bday & he still didn't go, which made his dad pretty upset at me. (Of course, it's all my fault) However, ex missed YS's bday the last 2 years. I don't think the kids should have to go over there & be miserable when his dad doesn't seem to really care about this problem.

charitylynne_1979

I agree. If your ex isn't willing to interact with you children while they are there, they then should be able to make the decision if they want to go or not.

BTW, did you get my message about your Facebook being hacked?

2carbuffs

Yes, & I did change my password. Thanks!

gvsubride05

That is a tough situation because you don't want to force your son to do something, however this is a critical time for your son and his father's realtionship. A skipped weekend here and there can quickly get to the point where there is little to no realtionship.

The only thing is it sounds like the father doesn't give a care or is even trying.  Have you approached your Ex on this?  Would he be open to meeting him at a location and doing something with him and then you pick up your YS after a few hours.  It is sucks though, because then your Ex pretty much gets to avoid the daily responsibilties of parenthood and just gets to see YS at the "fun time."

2carbuffs

I have spoken to ex about it & he blows it off just like everything. It would be hard for him to just spend a few hours with him, since ex lives an hour away. But, it could be done if he really wanted.

gvsubride05

He reminds me of someone in TH's family. He nows has no realtionship with his daugther. He gave it up for his wife, whom he is getting a divorce after only two years of marriage.

He always had her sleep on the couch when she came to visit for the weekend, even though there were two extra bedrooms. His GF moves in with her kids and all of sudden they are painting the rooms, buying new bedding, etc. to make it their rooms.  And he wondered why she never wanted to come visit for a weekend. They would always have her babysit her kids and the child they had together.

jillianmb

Ugh what a tough situation.  I feel so badly for your son.  Sounds like you can't make your ex care about doing things w/ your son so in your shoes I think I would just do my best to make sure he has other positive male role models or mentors in his life.  They can't replace his dad, but boys need good male influence and if he's not getting it from his Dad I'd make it my job to make sure he's getting it somewhere.