Canada Nesties
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Mommies with 2 under 2?
I'm pretty sure I'm pregnat again. And by pretty sure I mean I got a BFP last night! I'm not really sure how far along I am because I have only had one "sort of" period since I quit breastfeeding in July. We were not trying, but not very careful. I guess we took for granted that we would be safe since it took two years and help from an RE to conceive DS. Now I'm crazy scared. How am I gonna be a mommy to a one year old and a newborn? How are we going to afford two in daycare? I also feel very guilty that DS is getting cheated out of being a baby for a bit longer. I'm not ready to have him be a big boy yet!
Re: Mommies with 2 under 2?
I had 2 under 2! DS was 21 months when DD was born. DD was planned, so maybe that was the difference, but I never really worried about it. Don't get me wrong, I did worry about being able to handle a toddler and a newborn by myself all day. But I didn't worry about DS losing out on 'being the baby'. And I'm an at home mom, so we don't have to worry (yet) about paying for daycare.
But what I can say is that adjusting to 2 under 2 was easier than I was expecting! When DD was brand new she slept so much (as most newborns do) that a lot of the time it was like nothing had changed. I still had the time to spend one-on-one with DS. As DD was getting older and sleeping less, DS was adjusting to having her around, so jealousy and balance weren't too much of an issue. In a way, the situation had a very natural balance.
Probably the most difficult thing, though, was for the first 6 weeks DD was pretty turned around, so she was up much of the night. Doing night shift AND day shift was difficult, no doubt. Luckily I can function pretty well with no sleep, and DH did his best to help out when he was home in evenings and on weekends.
Now that they're a little older, I love having 2 of them, and having them close together. DD is crawling all over and chasing her brother around. They play together and laugh together. It's pretty fun now.
Ultimately, you (and LO) will survive the transition!! Good luck and congrats on the pregnancy!
I second what Sawyer said. People kept on saying it was going to be hard, etc, etc, and made it sound terrible. The first 4 weeks were the worst. DS#1 was angry at me and DH and he quit sleeping. But then things slowly got better. Now almost 6 months in, they love each other and it is fun to see them starting to interact.
My DH is lazy most of the time so the hardest part is getting everything done before bed. Like tonight, he left after dinner, leaving me to put 2 kids to bed, dishes, and laundry. He does this 2-3 times a week. So, if people offer help, be sure to take them up on it at first. You will be fine!
Mine are also 21 months apart. DS is now 3 months old. I am super lucky, as he is a dream baby and has been only waking once a night since shortly after he was born. Of course, DD was 21 months, and still wasn't STTN. DD loves DS, but we did have some behaviour issues in the beginning. She was great with DS, but was craving more attention. She decided that I needed to stay in her room in the chair until she fell asleep at naptime and at bedtime, which took 30-45 minutes most of the time. If I left, she screamed bloody murder and did not stop. We tried once and she hollered for over an hour (this was after I sat there for 45 minutes) and she was so upset she was shaking. So, when I was home alone it was difficult to get her to sleep because if I brought DS into the room, he would inevitably make a noise, and disturb her.
The last few weeks there has been noticeable improvement. Not only is she back to falling asleep on her own, most nights she is STTN finally.
If you can afford it, if your first child is in daycare, KEEP him there. Or if he isn't, think about putting him in even a few days a week. DD never went to daycare, but just this week we enrolled her to start going 2 days a week because I don't get anything done during the day with both of them, and I was craving 1 on 1 time with DS.
I am also fortunate that DH works long hours, but when he is home, he is fully engaged and helps out as much as he can.
And definitely don't be shy to accept any and all help that you are offered.
I am on my way to 2u2 and I have been having most of the same thoughts as you! They are only going to be 16 months apart. I worry about taking care of both of them, forcing Charlotte to grow up too fast, and on and on and on. Now that I have had some time to get used to the whole thing, I am getting really excited for baby 2. I don't have any advice for you, but at least we can go through this together!
Congrats!
I'm late to the game here, but my youngest two are 12 months and 4 days apart. Dominic is nearly 9 weeks old and Natalie 14 months old right now - it's doable and really not bad at all:) It takes some getting used to and some organization, but I'm loving it right now!!
I found having Natalie after Olivia was nearly 3 years old more of a challenge than having Dominic 1 year after Natalie. It was hard getting back into the groove of diaper/bottles/everything baby again:)
GL! You'll love it!!!