Just thought I'd share this with anyone in case you want to try it. It's a writing exercise I just had to complete for my dramatic (play/screen/TV) writing class. Each "Assignment" needs to be about one page single spaced.
Assignment #2 - Go Off On Someone
Pick one of your pet peeves that involves another person, a pet peeve that is activated or committed by someone against or to you. Pick a person you love, respect or admire that is not a family member. This is the person you?ll be going off on. Picture them. Who are they, what do they look like, what are they wearing, where are you, what time is it. Now, have them commit the act that insights your pet peeve. Set up the scene. Tell them off in writing, focusing on your pet peeve. Explain your pet peeve, where and how they went wrong. Go too far, lose it. Go off on their person, what you know about them, who they are, what you see, what they?re wearing, etc. Be unfair and abusive, verbally.
And then, part two...
Assignment #3 - Get Them Back
Bring the person you went off on back into your favor without apologizing. Lie to that person. Tell several flattering lies that become increasingly outrageous until you tell them the ultimate lie. Catch yourself lying (stop yourself). Then admit you were lying and recover with several points or lines of biting truth about them. Finally, admit a painful or embarassing truth about yourself.
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Writing the first one was awesome. It felt really good to just "fictionally" lay into someone who'd been irking me for a while. The second one was tough. I don't like "fake apologizing" or aggrandizing someone just for the sake of making them feel better, but what really got me was making the piece end the way the assignment requires (and still having it all work together as a monologue).