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Party Etiquette ?
DH is turning 30 next week. He doesn't want a big party, so we are planning to go out to dinner at Brasa (a Brazilian Steakhouse in Raleigh). I want to surprise him by inviting some friends to join us. The idea is they will all be there when we show up.
Here's my dilemma. The restaurant is on the expensive side ($38 for salad/appetizer bar and all you can eat meat and $27 for salad/appetizer bar). Is it rude for me to invite our friends out to this type of restaurant and expect them to pay? I can't change to a less expensive restaurant since DH is so excited about it.
I'm going to include the prices in the evite, along with a link to the restaurant so they understand what they are getting into. But do I need to specifically state that everyone is expected to pay for themselves or is that understood? I also was trying to find a nice way to say I understand if they cant come due to the cost. Any ideas?
ETA: Here's is what the invite says as of right now.
DH requested to celebrate his 30th birthday with a nice dinner at
[brazilian steakhouse]. The thing he doesn't know is that I'm inviting you guys to join
us!
If you've never been, [brazilian steakhouse] is a brazilian steakhouse that
specializes in rodizio: 13 types of fire-roasted meat. There are two
dinner options: their enormous salad and appetizer bar ($27) and the
salad/appetizer bar with unlimited rodizio meat (13 types) ($38). The
problem with unlimited meat is that it tends to get pricey, so I
completely understand if this isn't your thing and you prefer to not
join us.
The reservations will be for x:xxpm and I plan to arrive around x:xx with the birthday boy!
Absolutely no presents please! Surprising DH will be the perfect gift!
Re: Party Etiquette ?
i don't think that my friends would expect to be paid for, so it doesnt seem like a big deal to me all. maybe you could buy (some restaurants even let you bring) the birthday cake/dessert. i would revise this to something like
I'm buying the birthday cake, but please bring cash for your meal.
I dont' really think our friends would think this either, especially since we have been in supper club with most of them where each couple pays their own way. I just wasn't sure if the scenario changes since it is more of a bday party type of thing.
Last Race: California International Marathon - December 4, 2011 - 3:29:18, 7:59 pace
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I agree, I think your invite wording works great.
I had this same problem for DH bday even though I ended up just having pizza here at the house. The advice that was giving to me is that if you're inviting like one other couple, it's 'nice' to pay for their meal, but if it's multiple people, then it's usually understood that they're responsible for paying their way.
Either way, if our friends every invited us out. . unless they said "our treat", we'd expect to pay our own way.
Good luck!
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