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help..(long sorry)
Hi! I am new to this board...and I have a concern. DH and I have been married since June, and have only had sex once. Before we got married the last time we had sex was....well a while before that. The reason being sex is very painful for me. DH is the first person I was ever sexually involved with, and when we first started dating we did it like rabbits...after the newness wore off we still did it a normal amount, and it was still very enjoyable. Then after a while it felt kind of annoying, then started being painful...I don't know if the decreasing amounts of times we were having sex caused it to become uncomfortable, but now every time we try we have to stop because its hurts too much. It is very frustrating to both of us. I get wet enough (and if there is any doubt we try lube) but once he's in it feels like sand paper. Its awful! I have never had a pap smear done, so I am concerned. I have a dr. appt. tomorrow (its a new patient appt) so I plan on scheduling a pap and discussing the issue with the dr. Just wondering if anyone on here has had a similar experience and what the outcome was?
TIA!
Re: help..(long sorry)
Have you seen a physician? You could have a medical concern that's causing pain during sex.
When was the last time you had a physical exam of any type and why haven't you ever had a gyn exam? That should be a standard and a given once you get your period. So you're probably about 10 years overdue the very least.
If you don't like that doc's opinion, get another.GL.
An STD? Where are you getting that info? Is there a prior post from the OP that may indicate it?
Soreness when having sex do you have other symptoms?
It could be as simple as something small like a yeast infection, this could cause it to feel almost like sandpaper.
You could I suppose have a STD but I don't think I'd jump to that conclusion.
Really just go to the doctor and get a Pap (you should be getting them once a year anyway!) and be open and honest with the doc about what you're feeling and symptoms.
I am sort of in the same boat as you. How big is your H?
It is very uncomfortable for me during sex because my Fi is very large. 7 inches + actually. He may even be 8 inches. I am half asian, so I a petite girl. We have to use a lot of lube, and I often feel him hitting my insides, and I get dry and chafed very easy. This makes me not want to have sex. I have had many bacterial infections and yeast infections from sex with him. I have had to take antibiotics due to the bacterial infections.
I laugh when some girls say " If im not in the mood I just do it anyway". Its hard for me because it is so uncomfortable. I am always soar for a few days after sex.
This used toI am sort of in the same boat as you. How big is your H?
It is very uncomfortable for me during sex because my Fi is very large. 7 inches + actually. He may even be 8 inches. I am half asian, so I a petite girl. We have to use a lot of lube, and I often feel him hitting my insides, and I get dry and chafed very easy. This makes me not want to have sex. I have had many bacterial infections and yeast infections from sex with him. I have had to take antibiotics due to the bacterial infections.
I laugh when some girls say " If im not in the mood I just do it anyway". Its hard for me because it is so uncomfortable. I am always soar for a few days after sex.
I am sort of in the same boat as you. How big is your H?
It is very uncomfortable for me during sex because my Fi is very large. 7 inches + actually. He may even be 8 inches. I am half asian, so I a petite girl. We have to use a lot of lube, and I often feel him hitting my insides, and I get dry and chafed very easy. This makes me not want to have sex. I have had many bacterial infections and yeast infections from sex with him. I have had to take antibiotics due to the bacterial infections.
I laugh when some girls say " If im not in the mood I just do it anyway". Its hard for me because it is so uncomfortable. I am always soar for a few days after sex. Hi
I am sort of in the same boat as you. How big is your H?
It is very uncomfortable for me during sex because my Fi is very large. 7 inches + actually. He may even be 8 inches. I am half asian, so I a petite girl. We have to use a lot of lube, and I often feel him hitting my insides, and I get dry and chafed very easy. This makes me not want to have sex. I have had many bacterial infections and yeast infections from sex with him. I have had to take antibiotics due to the bacterial infections.
I laugh when some girls say " If im not in the mood I just do it anyway". Its hard for me because it is so uncomfortable. I am always soar for a few days after sex. Hi s
7 or 8 inches is a bit above average, the average being about 6 inches. Perhaps it's his girth -- and even still, vaginas usually come in one standard size for women, no matter what your height or build.
anitaeric: try voiding before and after sex and also take cranberry pills daily. It'll do wonders for your urinary system.
Go to an OBGYN immediately. Do not pass Go, do not collect $200.
Since you were previously able to have intercourse with your husband without difficulty, this pain could indicate a variety of medical conditions. You could have developed endometriosis or vuvlodynia or a host of other treatable conditions. You know that a fulfilling sex life is possible with your husband -- why have you not explored all options to get back to it?
She said sex went from normal to annoying to painfull. I suggested she should see a doctor because there are many different medical issues that can cause that. Anything from a cyst to infections to trich to herpes and other issues can cause graual increase in pain durring sex.
With some STD's, most men never have symptoms. You may not have an STD, but it is a possibility.
I am 23. I just got health insurance when I got married. I am not currently on BC but I was a couple years ago through the public health department. They did not require paps if you were younger than 23 or had not been having sex for more than 3 years and at the time I fit into neither category.
Full checkup. Talk to the doc absolutely honestly about the pain, when and how it happens. There are many different reasons for the pain medically.
Position makes a difference. Also if you are now stressed and anticipating discomfort it could become a self fulfilling prophecy. No slight meant to you or him- it would be a normal response to anticipate discomfort.
So talk to the doc very frankly about when the pain is, if things go 'dry' during sex, if there is a particular position that seems to trigger it. Don't worry about being embarrassed. Doc is your friend- Doc wants you to be healthy and happy in your marriage bed!
I half suspect its the horrid "self fulfilling prophecy"- only because I do anticipate the pain at this point and I get very anxious when we go slow to start out. There have been a few occasions where either I had a few beers, or (as awful as it sounds) I was COMPLETELY distracted and we were able to successfully make love. I am just paranoid hypochondriac. These few instances were a while ago (6 mos or more) and we have not been able to achieve it since. So I guess we will find out soon enough
Can I just tell you that I am HORRIFIED that pap smears are not required? That is ridiculous. There are a host of medical problems that can be detected with a thorough pelvic examination that need not involve sexual contact. I also think that the likelihood that a woman might lie about her sexual experiences before the age of 23 is high and that the public health department is truly failing the women of your state by not requiring a pelvic and pap smear.
I am off to send more money to Planned Parenthood.
I completely agree. I have a friend who was diagnosed with cervical cancer at age 17. She had never had sex before that and it was caught thanks to a pap. Gynecological issues do not start once you start having sex. Gynecological healthcare should not start when you start having sex. It should start when you start getting your period.