Phoenix Nesties
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Jenn's post got me thinking....
Will you tell your children the truth about who & when you lost your virginity if they ask?
I remember asking my Mom if she had only had sex with my Dad and she said yes. I can see where we were when I asked her, we were at a red light right by the mall. I couldn't believe it but I thought it was awesome.
Well, years pass and I ask her again and she said, "oh God no, Stacy." haha I said "so you lied to me?" and she said "well, what did you expect me to say?"
And now that I think about it, I don't want to tell my kids when I lost my virginity as I think it's too young even though there are kids doing it WAY younger than I did.
So, what will you do???
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Re: Jenn's post got me thinking....
That is a great question, I don't really have any regrets to when I lost mine, and you know except for age differences... I was 17 and the guy was 26. That part I would more then likely leave out. I can see my self telling them that I thought I was emotionally and physically ready and I had enough knowledge on how to protect myself and what the possible consequences of my actions would be... thanks to Biology Class! hahaha
I think since CJ lost his a little older then I did it would give them a good perspective on when each individual feels they are ready.
Does any of that make sense hahaha
ETA: I should probably say that I wouldn't just put this informtaion out there for them but if they ask then I would truthfully answer the question
Sure, I'll have no problem telling them at an appropriate age. It was DH on our wedding night and I think it will be a good example for them that it is possible to be abstinent until marriage.
Funny story, I remember being in 4th grade and asking my mom if she was a virgin. Obviously I really didn't understand what it meant and I didn't know much about sex. Then only things I did know at that age it was good to be a virgin and it wasn't appropriate for us to see anything sexual on tv. I remember feeling so disappinted in her.
hahaha i think i would say what your mom said stacey lol. i wasnt a slut or anything but my 1st time wasnt too special hahaha. alex was a bit of a wild man whore(!!) and we are better off saying we lost our virginity to each other. haha.
I always tell anyone the truth if asked a direct question... my kids will not be an exception to that. I will expect my kids to respect me enough to be honest with me, so they deserve that as well.
I agree to a certain extent. I don't lie nor do I like being lied to BUT sometimes stretching the truth is better for children.
Totally agree I wouldn't lie because i wouldn't wnat to be lied too. but I would censor the information a bit...
Click Me
I would tell my kids the truth. But my truth is squeeky clean
This : ) My hubby is my one and only! So, I will be happy to tell them that!
That is a scary thought! lol
Yes, I would tell her. I wouldn't lie to her. Especially since I caved to pressure when I wasn't really ready, and regretted it. I would probably focus a lot on that aspect of it, and maybe it would help me come from a place where I sound less like "Do what I say just because I know best"
ETA: This could vary completely depending on her age when she asks me this. lol But if she comes to me at like 12 or older, I am pretty sure I would want to have that heart-to-heart to her about it, especially if it seems like she is using at as a round-about-way to get some guidance.
I will have an honest and open answer ready that is also age appropriate. I don't understand lying or hiding the truth. If you did it and regret it, talk to your kids about that. If you are proud of the decisions you made, tell them that.
My sister was married at 20 and pregnant at the time. Her oldest thinks she's been married a year longer than she has. I personally think that is so silly. Talk to your kids about the decisions you made that have shaped your life... they'll get a lot out of it.
Trust me... kids don't make decisions to be more like their parents. ha ha. They generally want to do just the opposite of what they're told.
That's exactly what I meant... but stated a lot better. LOL
I completely agree. And I would never want to hide anything or lie about anything and have my kids find out somehow later, and things always come out at one point or another. I don't ever want my kids (or anyone for that matter) to feel as though I've not been straight forward with them.