April 2010 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
A FB question... since it's slow
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why?
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why?
What is your opinion on unfriending?
Re: A FB question... since it's slow
To answer my own questions:
The only person I've ever unfriended was "crazy Jane" - remember the thread I posted about 6 weeks ago about the girl who flipped out at my friend's wedding and was telling people my husband was in love with her?? Otherwise I would probably just block people from seeing my stuff before I would unfriend them. In her case I was intentionally sending a message.
I have never been unfriended that I know of. A couple times my friend count dropped but I didn't notice anyone I'm close to go away or know who dropped off, so it was probably someone who dropped off FB or cleaned out their friends list to include only those they know well.
I think with the way FB handles privacy settings now, a lot of unfriending is unnecessary. It's mostly done to make a point like I did with crazy Jane. When I hear that people do it because they don't like a political statement someone makes or something, I just roll my eyes. I have a few people blocked on my feed because of stuff like that but they're still on my friends list.
TTC #1 since 4/10, Dx: MFI IVF planned for April/May
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why? No I don't think I've ever unfriended anyone.
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why? Yes I have been unfriended once or twice. I think its happened with people I haven't spoken to or contacted.
What is your opinion on unfriending? Eh I guess its not a huge deal.
Every few months I go thru my Facebook friends and figure out when the last time I talked to them was and if I care about what they post or who they are.
I don't really care when people unfriend me. I probably didn't want to be friends with them in the first place!
Tales From a Kitchen Misfit
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I defriended some people on FB if: A) it's not someone I'm close to or it's a frined of a friend who added me, I accepted then changed my mind;
it's someone I haven't talked to in forever and they never update their status or comment on mine; or C) I have a falling out with hte person.
I have been defriended and defriended someone else due to a falling out. The defriending on my end was to some people whom I had no beef with, but there would have been a conflict of interest stemming from this falling out.
My opinion on defriending is this - I don't base my life around whether or not I'm friends w/ someone on facebook. I have a LOT of former co workers, classmates from college and high school, neighbors, friends of friends, family of friends, etc....I don't talk to or see a lot of the acquaintances on a regular basis so if someone I hardly ever hear from threw me off FB I wouldn't slit my wrists over it. Defriending by someone I am close to, it may bug me a bit depending on the nature of the deleting.
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why? No, I have not. I do have some people's posts blocked kus they post obnoxious things that annoy me.
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why? Yes I have noticed a 3 specific people, and maybe a few times I have seen my number of friends drop, but it had to have been someone that I do not really interact with at all. 2 of the 3 that I noticed were only because those people were constant posters, not good friends. The first girl I think added my by mistake in the first place (there were 3 Courtney's in my high school graduation class, and I had never hung out with this girl before). The second was a guy that initially added EVERYONE that he ever knew, and probably just did a clean out. The 3rd was the wife of a friend at my gym, and while they were going through a really nasty divorce (she was putting all the details all over Facebook) she defriended everyone at the gym that was his friend.
What is your opinion on unfriending? I guess that it is not a big deal, it can be a bit hurtful I guess, but in all 3 cases of me knowing that someone defriended me they were really only acquaintances from the past that I never knew that well anyways, well and then the ugly divorce girl, but that is its own thing.
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why?
Yes - I defriended a couple of girls that I had no business friending in the first place. They were "friends of a friend" who friended me shortly after I became friends with a former co-worker that I was close friends with. I just thought - if they are friends of hers, and they want to know me, then fine. I don't post too personal stuff anyway, and I removed my colleges and work information from my page (it just felt weird having all that out there in one place. Not that someone couldn't find it if they were super motivated, but I figure why make it easy for some shady character?).
But then I was chatting with a girlfriend who was saying how she had these friends who didn't even interact with her, so why did they friend her in the first place? To grow their numbers?? Well, that got me to thinking. Not only didn't I know those girls, but they never said hi, or otherwise interacted with me. So I went to their pages, and posted a short "Hey" comment...and neither responded. They both also had like 1500 or so friends, so I felt that I was just a number, and so I defriended them. They probably never missed me! LOL
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why?
Yes - By a third person who I should never have friended also! hahaha...Remember my "off" second cousin by marriage from NC who "defriended me" and went off on me because she did not see my response to her birthday wish that she sent me on FB? She thought I didn't respond to her, but responded to everyone else. Sent me a nasty message, and cut me off. My response? Good Riddance!! That also reinforced that I don't friend anyone anymore that I don't interact with and communicate with. I like it that way, 'cause my group is small, but cool :-))
What is your opinion on unfriending?
I don't think about it too much. I also see my numbers go up and down, but like you - the folks that I communicate with are there, so I don't pay it too much mind. But in general, it would take a lot for me to unfriend a person who is really a friend (not strangers like the three mentioned above). I have folks who are extreme in their views (political, religious, etc.)
If it gets to be too much or too annoying to look at daily, I just "hide" their comments from my feed, and I don't see them anymore. They are not blocked, and they are still my friends. In fact, they never know that I can't see their daily posts!
This! Exactly! In college I friended SO many people and I had to purge that after I graduated (probably 200+ people), so that I would have a newsfeed of people that I know and care about.
Post-Wedding Life Blog!
A10 Siggy Challenge: Next Vacation Destination: San Francisco!
I only unfriend people when I see them pop up and I honestly do not know who they were. I had way too many friends on there for a while (people from class in college and stuff), and I decided that I would rather focus my attention and my news feed on people I was actually friends with.
I don't know if I have been unfriended, I assume that I have, because I am sure people have felt the same way as I do above.
I think unfriending is necessary, people cycle in and cycle out...it just happens.
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why? Yes...a prior knottie...
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Yes...by a prior knottie....
Do you know why? What is your opinion on unfriending? No big deal (yet). Their lives didn't affect me so it was all hunky dory!
Shmel's Blog
I try to only friend people that I want to interact with on some level...and I do notice that it's a cycle - some go through phases where they post a little, a lot, or not at all. I still like knowing that they are just a click away if I did need to ask something, or just to say "Hi!"...
I have always been notoriously bad about the phone. I've never been one to spend a lot of time on the phone chatting to anyone (except with my Mom - but that's different!) - so I really think FB is great in that I can just write a quick message and keep up with folks that w/o FB I probably would never call...
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why? Yes, I went through and purged people. My friend list had skyrocketed to 400+ people, and I realized I didn't really know/care about all those people. The impetus was when someone I hadn't spoken to in YEARS posted something nasty about my alma mater before a big game, and I was all, "Who are you, and why are you allowed to post mean things on my page?" ::delete::
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? The only one that I really know for sure was a friend. We were superclose when we both lived in Chicago, hung out all the time, and then I moved to Iowa and she moved to Arizona. We didn't talk as much (obviously), but still kept in touch on a weekly basis. I even asked her to be a bridesmaid, and she agreed. Well, four months before the wedding she backed out of being in the wedding, and then two weeks before the wedding she emailed and said she wasn't coming at all. We haven't really spoken since (I've reached out with little or no response), and I recently noticed she defriended me. No clue what happened. I kind of miss her, but it's her life.
What is your opinion on unfriending? Apart from the above situation, I really couldn't care less. I'm not really friends with 80% of the people on my "friends" list, and I find I use FB less and less over time.
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why? Only a couple of times, always because I hadn't talked or interacted with them in years.
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why? I really have no idaa...
What is your opinion on unfriending? People who would defriend my probably don't need to be my friends on their anyway, and to be honest I don't think I would even notice. I guess my opinion is, it's just facebook who cares.
Have you ever unfriended anyone on FB? Why?
One specifically because we had a major falling out. But we have recently become "friends" on fb again. I am still unsure how I feel about this. I accidently unfriended a couple knotties (sorry girls!) when I was cleaning out my friends. I felt pressured to accept requests from a bunch of girls who were joining my old sorority and got so over it that I went through and deleted anyone whose name didn't immediatly resonate with me. They don't know me and I don't know them so I felt it was no biggie.
*If I deleted you on accident find me and we can be friends again
Have you ever been unfriended on FB that you know of? Do you know why?
Not that I know of, but my feelings would not be hurt if it was someone from way past or someone I barely know cleaning out their friends list.
What is your opinion on unfriending?
Like a few of the other ladies mentioned, I too think that it's necessary to clean out the friends list from time to time. I only want people who I am friends with or have a sincere interest in what is going on in their lives...or if they have an interest in what is going on in mine (like friends of parents). If someone is doing it spitefully I think it is immature. Granted, I deleted someone intentionally bc of a falling out, but that was bc I didn't (and still do not) want anything to do with her. It was a horrible, horrible situation where there was no recovery from. Sorry, but if you cuss out my parents who have done many, many nice things for you such as co-signing for you when your own mother would not..there is no return.
This! I did the first clean out about a month ago- most of the people were people I could say I never had a conversation with- just a hi how are you in passing from growing up in the same community.
April 2010 Siggy Challenge: Next Vacation Destination