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another il frustration...just a vent
When DH was 17 his father co-signed a loan for him to get a BRAND NEW CAR - something my family, or I, would never do. DH was really young and working a lot, but couldn't keep up with the payments on both the car and the huge insurance payments, understandable for a 17-year-old. Well FIL filed for bankruptcy a few years ago and told DH that the car was taken car of in that (car died a long time ago, before I even met DH). In May the bank contacted us and let us know that in fact it was not taken care of and if DH didn't start making payments his wages would be garnished, so we worked out a payment schedule.
(FIL filed for the type of bankruptcy that cleared his name off the loan but left it all on DH and never told him. Nice huh? So now the bank has no legal action against FIL even though he did in fact, co-sign on this loan)
We are working really hard to get DH out of the financial mess he is in (he admits he did it himself and that his parents were never good financial role models for him) and asked if his parents could fund half of the payment and they agreed. So every month since May I have had to call, e-mail and text them to get them to make the payment. DH will call them and they will tell him they're going to do it that day, and I never get the $$. I don't understand how they're not grasping that this is a monthly bill that needs to be paid, each month. It is so frustrating that at 23 I am more financially responsible and diligent about bills than people over twice my age.
I feel like creating form like a utility bill and mailing it out to them with a return envelope and a late fee structure. But I won't...
Re: another il frustration...just a vent
Why are you calling them for the money? If this was your DH's car, why now (that he is of an age when he should be making the payments) are you relying on people who didn't follow through the first time when they first co-signed the car?
How old is your DH? If he's your age (23), why would he not still have that car after it's been only 6 years? Why wouldn't he have been checking his credit report to ensure that debt was indeed taken care of financially when FIL filed for bankrupcy?
If you are indeed "mature" and "financially responsible" as you put it in your post - stop relying on his mother and father to pay for a car that your DH owned and operated. If the payment is too high, try a different bank and refinance the loan. Where is this car now?
Why in the world are you guys expecting them to pay anything on this car?
FIL co-signed, but your DH is the one who is responsible for the car. Yes, it sucks that he now has to pay for a car that is long dead, but expecting people who have made no good financial choices in their lives to make payments consistently on someone else's debt is lunacy.
Let it go and suck it up!
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Like I said, it was just a vent. DH is 29. He was 17 when this all happened which is, in my opinion, not an age that a child should be buying a brand new car. I also said that the car died awhile ago. His dad is the reason he was able to get it and allowed this to happen. Reflecting back now, DH realizes it was a mistake and wishes he had been advised differently. And we're also asking for half of the payment because we are barely getting by right now. We both work full-time but are just scraping by with money, plus to DH's knowledge, this was taken care of before he and I even met! His father LIED to him about it and I'm sorry but when you co-sign on something, you do take on a certain amount of responsibility for that loan. That is why it is called "co-signing"...
I'm not expecting them to be responsible at this point, as I know they aren't capable of that. I just wanted to vent to someone other than my mother who can't stand them.
It sucks- I don't want to take that away. It's sad to see parents who make poor choices that greatly affect their kids.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Yes it does, thank you. I'm teaching DH about budgeting and planning and saving, much like my mom did.
In January a few of his debts are done and we will be taking over this payment completely. Thank God.
On a positive note, DH is in the running for a fantastic job in a larger city near us that would give him more money and give us more time together as the schedules would be similar. (right now we work opposite schedules and it blows)
Gretchen Evie, born 7/8/2012 at 35w5d
i didn't know that 17 year olds could sign for a car loan even with a cosigner (thought you had to be 18 and legally an adult).
that said, i'd be venting heavily too. a 17 year old knows virtually nothing about the world, and even if he did research on his own, i think he was still at an age when he should have been able to count on his parents' guidance. making it possible for your underage child to buy a brand new car is irresponsible parenting, regardless of who was planning to make the payments. of course, since your FIL has since filed bankruptcy, i'd say it's likely this isn't the only stupid financial decision in his past.
I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO SYMPATHY FOR YOUR DH.
It is not as if this happened w/in a couple years. There was TWELVE WHOLE YEARS between the purchase of the car and today.
By your own words, the car did not get repossessed, but ("died awhile ago"), nor did your FIL file for bankruptcy right after the purchase, but "filed for bankruptcy a few years ago". So what was he doing in the interm?
He had YEARS where he was a grown up - where he could have done the right thing and made a new payment plan. He was just happy to let his Daddy take the fall. SELFISH.
And the fact that he never once, in the last 12 years, looked at his credit report...or got a job that did a credit check, or applied for a rental that did not do a credit check, etc...just slays me. He doesn't have ONE credit card?
Even if he father lied (which I am doubting since there is absolutely NO WAY it took the bank years (again you said FIL applied for bankruptcy a few years ago), to come looking for your DH for his share.
Your InLaws have already paid years more on somethign that YOUR DH wanted. Now he needs to grow the hell up and take responsibility. And YOU need to stop placing blame on other people.
I just want to add, that not always are people looking for advice whether it be negative or positive. Sometimes this is just the only place they feel they can vent to individuals that are out of their circle of people.
Is it necessary to make comments that seem to put mile3dm or her DH down, I don't think so. If you feel the need to, simply read the title of her post: "just a vent".
Sorry, maybe I am just having a grumpy day but I think it says it simply enough in the title. Not that I am agreeing or disagreeing with the situation, just wanted to add my two cents about that. Obviously we do not know the whole situation because we are not in it.
Now that I am sure I sound like a grumpy, haha have a good day! And remember: this too shall pass!
I'm sorry, I understand that you are just venting, but your DH needs to step up. When I was 17, I knew that I couldn't afford a brand-new car. I'm 25 and I know that I can't afford a brand-new car.
Bills just don't "go away."
Just an FYI, your FIL's financial responsibility for the car loan was wiped out when he filed Bankruptcy.
Part of being a co-signer is acknowledging the fact that if one person can't pay for the debt, the other person will be responsible for it.
OP, I can't believe your H is expecting his parents to pay any portion of these payments now. Co-signing does not mean you have to make half the payments. It means you are responsible to the bank in the event the primary borrower defaults. Then the cosigner is well within their rights to go after the primary borrower for a full refund.
I'm also assuming your H was very negligent in caring for the car since it died less than 6 yrs after manufacture. I agree it was foolish for your ILs to cosign this purchase initially, but ultimately the loss is solely your H's responsibility.
OMG... please just shutup.
And it stops being a vent the moment you're expecting someone else to fix the mistake YOU made. I could understand if she was venting about how she wishes her H had kept on top of it and it's going to put them in a financial bind blah blah blah. But this post is more about how her H is actively trying to get his parents to pay for it. THEN it's perfectly acceptable to tell the OP "tell your H to grow up! This is his fault, not his parents"
If the father already filed bankruptcy, then he is free of the loan. He has no responsibility to this loan. And, in order to keep the peace, you need to stop asking them for the money. No good can come of that.
I don't know how things are in MI, but most states have a statute of limitations on how long a company can try to get money out of you. If it was a 5 year loan and your husband is now 29, then it seems that time may have run out. Also, sometimes when you pay off a loan, even if you have made arrangements it can still be on your credit report. Besides, why is this loan still under the bank and not turned over to a collection company? I would contact a lawyer about this. Possibly the one who represented your Father in Law in his bankruptcy as they are going to know the laws in this area.
I am with the other poster on the question of how did a 17 year old get a loan anyway, even with a co-signer? He was a minor.
None of this seems right. Everyone makes financial mistakes at one time or another but don't make one mistake over another by not looking into this further.
why are YOU Chasing them for the money? seem like your DH hasn't grow up much since 17. HE can call. HE can get the money from them. it's HiS car and HIS mess. let him deal with parents for it.
but it is HIS responsibility now since FIL filed bankruptcy. your DH and your DH alone.
The fact that your DH was 17 when he signed the loan jumped out at me, too. I'm not encouraging your DH to be a deadbeat about the loan, but can the bank even hold him responsible for the loan since he signed the contract (loan) before the age of majority (18)?
Are these demands for payment coming from a lending institution or a collections agency?
Are the garnishment threates even credible? Did you investigate it?
How long ago did he stop making payments? There are consumer protects in place to prevent old debts like this to come "after you", so to speak. And it may not have been in his best interest to start repaying the loans because is could re-start the date of an outstanding, unpaid loan on his credit history. If this is more than 7 years ago, it wouldn't have even shown on his credit report. Now it probably will.
I am not trying to be snarky, at all. I just wanted to point out that you DO have some possible consumer protections and options here. Including discharging the loan because he was a minor when he agreed to it. I'd hate to see you bullied by a preditory collections agency with half-truths and bold face lies.
I'd post the details of your situation on Money Matters and see what advice you get.
Agreed. My father co-signed for one of my law school loans when I was a kid, but it was MY debt, MY obligation, and *I* was the one who reaped the benefit, so *I* am the one who paid it off.
That's as it should be. I have no idea where you & your husband get off thinking that H's father should owe the two of you anything for a car that was H's. That's ridiculous.
And immature.
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Oh, and by the way, it is legally impossible for a bankruptcy action filed by one person to wipe out an obligation of debt for another person.
Your H was in his 20s when the bankruptcy was filed, not a kid. He should have looked into it (or... y'know... thought logically about it) rather than thinking daddy was still taking care of it for him.
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Wow, I also never said that I was "Letting Daddy take the fall". We are paying it right now.
"Even if he father lied (which I am doubting since there is absolutely NO WAY it took the bank years (again you said FIL applied for bankruptcy a few years ago), to come looking for your DH for his share.
Your InLaws have already paid years more on somethign that YOUR DH wanted. Now he needs to grow the hell up and take responsibility. And YOU need to stop placing blame on other people"
My in-laws haven't paid a cent on this - where did you get that idea from?
Yes, I know there are two types of bankruptcy: Chapter 7 (liquidation) and Chapter 13 (reorganization/debt adjustment). I'm an attorney. Both of those apply only to the person filing the bankruptcy application and not to the debts or obligations of anyone else. In order for your husband to be realeased from his debts, he needed to file for bankruptcy. Daddy can't do it for him.
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I'm sorry; but this is not your fil's responsibility. It's your dh's; and for twelve years he's let it slide? Please. PLEASE.
And now you're handling his issues. Sigh. Yes, that'll teach him how to take care of his finances; badgering his parents to pay your dh's bills HE is supposed to have paid all along.
The two of you should sign up for credit counselling and financial planning; and some marriage counselling besides, to learn how to manage your money and your credit together; and marriage counselling for how to handle life together as two adults as opposed to mommy and baby.
I don't understnad how you could be so greedy and grasping (and infantile) as to badger his parents to pay for your husband's bad debt.
So you are expecting me to believe that in the last 8+ years (generously giving your DH 4 years of payments), there has not been a cent paid on this car, it was never repossessed? That the bank did not start legal proceedings against either your DH or your Father. That the bank just let a car payment slide?
I am having a hard time believing that this happened, kind of like I seriously doubt it took a few years for the bank to start going after your DH after FIL filed for bankruptcy. That just does not happen.