Holidays
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
distant holidays
my fiance and i are going to be moving from st. louis to the northwest wisconsin area. He had a job in St. Louis for awhile and his job will be bringing him to Wisconsin. My family is from Sacramento, CA. Both of us are in a bind for sharing some of the holidays (Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years) I keep telling him that since we are a lot closer to his family we can spend Easter and Christmas with my family. He still wants to spend time with his family however on the holidays that we are sharing with mine. IDK if im being too pushy when i tell him that i just want to spend it with my family and not his because we can see them whenever we can, unlike my family.
PLEASE HELP!!!
Re: distant holidays
Holiday are important and I don't think seeing a family alot means that they automatically dont' get to see you on the major holidays.
That being said, though, I'm a little confused - I'm assuming you have to fly to see your family. Is he saying he wants to spend some time around the holiday to see his family, or is he actually expecting you to travel home ON the holiday in order to see his too?
If he's jsut talking "around" that time, I really don't see the big deal.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
How about you reverse this scenario and y'all live closer to your family. How would you feel never getting to participate in a Holiday with your family from here after, because you get to see your family more.
Or better yet, picture yourself 22 years down the line and your child tells you that you won't be seeing them Thanksgiving because you all got together for Aunt Susies birthday in the month of October.
No family gets all of the holidays. And you never should bow to pressure to go to one over the other.
But not putting your partner's feelings on an equal footing (yoru DH does get to see his family too you know), is destructive to a marriage.
You may want to set some kind of tradition now so that you generally have a plan for how you want to do things. Every year my aunt and her family came the day after Christmas so that they could spend the actual holiday with her husband's family, and then the week after and New Years were her family. Easter was a toss up depending on what they felt like doing, and she always had Thanksgiving at her house (which we either did or didn't go to). The fact that they always did it the same every year solved a lot of problems with regards to arguments because everyone accepted and moved on rather than fighting about it every year.
Christmas is a really big deal in my family, so we generally spend it with them, but when we were in NY (we're now in Cali) we had Christmas day at our place so that if the ILs wanted to come, they could too. We're having Easter at our house this year, Thanksgiving we're not going anywhere just doing something small, and Christmas we're going to NY. Probably going to spend a different day the week we're home with a different part of the family. It will be hectic to say the least...
Tea Time for Lulu