Family Matters
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Hypothetical....maybe. Free house w/mother.
What would you guys do? After I graduated college, my parents' house was put in my name. It will remain mine always with no mortgage or anything left to pay. The catch....my parents will live there too. My dad is not around much, so that is no big deal, he has a house in AZ. My mom lives here though and is somewhat dependent/sick a lot/self-pitying. We pay all the utilities, taxes, and even everyone's cell phones. Basically, there is not one bill other than their own charge cards to pay. Lately, though I am wondering if it was worth it. I just don't want to part with the house and 30 acres it is on. It was part of the large amount of dairy land my grandpa bought. Hmmm... thoughts? Am I being ridiculous and this seems like a fair trade?
Re: Hypothetical....maybe. Free house w/mother.
Do you have to live there?
If you're looking for an out, move out. Go get an apartment. The house will still be in your name, you won't be getting rid of a future home, but let mom and dad live there. THEY pay the utility bills if they're living there.
ETA: I gotta ask because I'm curious, not because I have evil intents. Did you have to sign a contract (or other legally binding agreement) saying that you would let them live there?
I don't know--it would work for me because my mother is easy and fun. I think in many cases this is a bad idea, because not only are you living with family, you've got this weird agreement.
I think that on the one hand, it is not fair that they live there too yet don't contribute at all to the house. However, I assume that they did pay the mortgage for 30 years until it was paid off?
If you have 30 acres, is it possible to build another house on the property?
What would happen if you said it was not worth it? If you moved out? Would they stay in the house or would they move? This seems like a strange, complicated situation.
I would never....there is always a catch!
I'd live in an apartment.
This was my question. DH and I have a couple that we're friends with that are in a similar situation. They technically own (thanks to inheriting it from the grandparents, but the parents had refinanced it and were paying off the refi-) that one set of parents lives in. Theirs is also on 20+ acres of land. Since their parents were paying on it still, our friends decided to build their own house on the same land. It gave them their own space, but they still get to enjoy their land.
Well, the house is mine, we do live there too. If we didn't I am sure they would stay there for as long as possible, as long as they could come up with $ for bills. I legally own the house, with my brother as co-signer for anything so that I couldn't turn around, sell the house, and leave my mom (mainly) on the streets:)
The story is rather complicated in that my dad built the house, owned several other houses in Milwaukee. He sold all the properties, paid off anything owned on now our house, and bought a place in AZ. My parents are together legally, but it has always been a weird relationship (ie don't sleep in same bedroom). My dad is rather old, and hates wills, so instead of writing in a will I get this house, it was transferred to me now. Plus if something outrageous happened they wouldn't lose it.
So, I feel that it is somewhat ok that my mom stays there w/o paying bills, but sometimes it drives me nuts. Like when she has fans on and it is 40 degrees outside. Really? And when she gets sick and I am stuck taking care of all her dogs, when I have my own to worry about.
It seemed like a good thing a few years ago but lately I am about to jump ship sometimes. But really, what would you put up with for a free house?
this.