Holidays
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Christmas gifts...
Just wanted some others input on this one..
Back story> My sisters and brother ( and spouses) do a Christmas name drawing, so that way we only have to get one gift and a gift for each of the kiddo's, and will get together at someones house and do the gifts, my bother and his wife ( married a little over 1 1/2 yrs) backed out of the drawing this year do to budget issues, she has 3 kids (14&6&4) from a previous marriage< Question: there not going to show up to the gift exchange this year, Would YOU still get the kids gifts and make the extra trip out to there house? guess I'm trying to deiced if I'm being selfish by not wanting to do it....
Re: Christmas gifts...
Call me Cheap, I call it growing up!
Can you all adjust the name drawing to accomodate the budget issues? For example, homemade gifts this year or $5 gifts? Amazon always has $5 mag subscriptions, etc.
My sister had hard times one year so we scrapped the gift exchange all together (except one sister who has a ton of money bought for all the kids without telling us). I think it is about the people not the gifts, so I would make every effort to include every member of the family, even if that means altering the usual gift exchange.
Here's the thing- if they aren't even going to come to spend time w/ everyone, that tells me that they are going to feel awkward because they know that peopel will give theirkids gifts and they probably also dont' plan on getting any other kids gifts themselves.
To still get their kids gifts and go to their house- it may still put them in the uncomfortable spot of feeling they 'have' to reciprocate.
That's why I might say dont do gifts at all.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
As a general rule in our family, if you don't come then you don't get gifts. Now some members of the family are closer than others so some will still get gifts for certain people who don't come but that's not very public because those gifts are delivered - not opened in front of everyone.
I think it all depends on how close you are/want to be with these kids. But from what you've said, I wouldn't get gifts.
i think everyone understands that budget issues are a reality, but it seems like a shame that they are not even going to show up. i understand it might be awkward if they are not exchanging gifts...but as much as i like gifts (i definitely do!), i feel being with family is very important. as someone else mentioned too - perhaps there could have been an adjustment to the exchange, like a lowered spending limit.
at this point, i would still get something for the kids, maybe something little (inexpensive) yet special. i'm sure they will appreciate the gifts. if their house is far away maybe you could wrap and mail the gifts or even send something directly to their house from wherever you order it (a couple month month membership to netflix for the family, or send cookies, brownies, etc.).
however - if you don't want to do it, i don't think you are selfish. you have a right to decide who you buy gifts for, and how you spend your holidays. hope it all works out!!
I would also do a family gift. Either a movie basket, or "Game Night", or if you know they have a video game system- you could do something fun with that.
And then I would just hang on to the gift until the next time you saw them. Or ship it to them if they live far.