Caribbean Nesties
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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"If you wait 'til you can afford it, you'll never have kids!"
I've been told this by no less than 4 different people.
My excuse when people ask (joking or not) when we're having kids has always been "When we can afford daycare!" Mainly because people my parents age have no clue what daycare in 2010 costs (especially in this area). So what is that "advice" supposed to mean? Should I just have a kid and *hope* that we'll win the lottery or that my parents will move here and babysit for free? Because that extra $1600 a month for daycare? It's not there, folks! And we have no family in this area! And I'm pretty damn sure we don't qualify for any sort of aid!
No point to this really, just wanted to rant.
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
Re: "If you wait 'til you can afford it, you'll never have kids!"
I hate this advice so SO much. I know I've ranted about this before. The whole, "There's no such thing as a 'right time' to have kids." Yes, but there is definitely such thing as a wrong time to have kids.
I can see how this can be even more frustrating for you since you live in the city with the highest cost of day care (based on average salary in the area).
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
I agree, it's super annoying. We have a couple we're friends with and they used to tell us the same thing. My response was always, well, if we lived in a house owned by our parents paying them $500 a month and had an other parent to watch my kids I could afford two kids just like you. that pretty much shut them up.
not that I really wanted another kid anyway, but that they just couldn't even begin to comprehend.
I frequently have this argument when it comes to #2.
Their answer? One of you can stay home. Ah, yes, we both have been working all this time because we just love it so much.
For less then ten cents a day, you can feed a hungry child.
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
I think there is some truth to this statement (as in, you will always think you need to save more before you will be comfortable with baby expenses, or at least I feel that way). But that does NOT apply to freaking day care. That's insane.
My mom said something last week about my cousin's kid spending so much time in daycare and how sad it is. I asked her if she realized my hypothetical kids would also be in daycare a lot of the time, and she said, "Can't you get a nanny?" Sure mom, if you want to pay for it.
The nerve!
House | Blog
This. I'd say that if you're trying to wait for the *perfect* time when you've paid off all debt and are sitting atop your financially stable perch, you will never have them. But, yeah, waiting until you can afford the basics of childcare w/out starving is a good idea.
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
Where the hell do you live again?? I kinda agree w/ you though. I live in a LCOL area, make a good bit more than the avg person in this area, and still pretty much just manage to pay bills and mortgage w/ a little spending money and savings left over. Our house is inexpensive, we drive cheap cars... It's not like we're over here living it up and a lot of ppl around here earn less than we do. It's cookey. Life is f'ing expensive.
I also doubt my parents will be dropping everything to come help me as I recover after giving birth. I'm surprised at how many people's parents do this. I think my parents are broken, y'all.
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Yes.
Oh, I forgot about my dad's comment:
Dad: Don't worry about daycare.
Me: Oh, so you and Mom are moving here and watching my kid?
Dad: No, you move here! Wait, I don't think South Carolina has libraries...
Don't worry???? WTF? (His last comment made me lol, though)
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
My MIL wanted to keep Liza for us, but then I would've had to (a) talk to my MIL daily; and (b) have a kid who said things like "plaskit", "wal-marts" and "warshington".
No thanks.
I love daycare.
Your problem is that you're being honest about your reasons. You should try going with "We're waiting until Mr. Bobloblaw loses interest in cunnilingus since having a baby will do irreparable damage to my vagina, and he really really loves my hopscotch just the way it is."
They'll probably stop asking.
And also, you could just move to South Jersey. We have libraries, and I'll give you a discount on the daycare I start when you pay me to stay home and watch our babies.
3 out of 4 dead babies agree! pepsi is better than coke! - EdithBouvierBeale
Lordy. Grow some balls and stop lurking. It's like stealing from the internet. Jesuschrist. -- AudreyHorne
I hate love and marriage. I got married so I could destroy these things from the inside. - NoisyPenguin
It's a good thing my circle of trust is as giant as my vagina. That only leaves a couple people out. - Cali
Bob, my mom also thinks I should move to where they live in order to get free daycare. Next door to them, even!
Except I wouldn't be able to find a job in my field, so she suggested I become a teacher. So I'll take a paycut and then build a freaking house to get free daycare. This is a money-saver for sure.
The nerve!
House | Blog
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
Oooh, I'd love for you to watch my kid! S/he would have excellent taste in television.
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Yeah, don't worry about it, just get knocked up. Worst advice ever. I hate the thought of daycare. We budgeted for our house with daycare costs in mind and we don't even have kids yet.
On the cost front, are you open to in-home daycares? My kid will have to go to one because centers are too damn expensive. Have you seen this site? http://www.eec.state.ma.us/ChildCareSearch/EarlyEduMap.aspx. Daycare provider search and a lot of them list rates.
Claire Elizabeth 12/31/2011
Married Bio
We have libraries in RI.
For less then ten cents a day, you can feed a hungry child.
Oooh, I have not! Thank you!
I bet her FUPA's name is Shane, like the gunslinger/drifter of literature.--HappyTummy
You sit on their foffing waiting list, because that's how long it will take to get in.
Re: "Can't you get a nanny?" How on earth is that so much better? I love the structured nature of the daycare and the socialization it allows/requires.
I also don't get how people pay $1600/mo for daycare. How do service industries even exist in those areas? I think an infant around here is usually around $150/wk and that's even probably too much to make sense for people who make around minimum wage.
"That chick wins at Penises, for sure." -- Fenton
Off the books, unlicensed, in-home daycare is an option if you have crazy awesome references. My close friend's mom did that and I would consider it an option if she was still taking kids (even though my kid would probably become a holy roller in the process).
I agree, though, parents have no idea what daycare costs. A good reason/excuse I used to use was "waiting to find a new job with better mat leave/benefits and I can't get the job I want until I have a few more years of experience under my belt."
"As of page 2 this might be the most boring argument ever. It's making me long for Rape Day." - Mouse
Seriously. I should've put myself on a wait list the day we conceived.