Annual Holiday Battle

A.Hoyt

I dont know if anyone else has this situation going on in there home every year but we sure do ! White lights vs colored lights on the tree. I grew up with having white lights to decorate for Christmas. My H gerw up with colored lights. The past couple years we have been alternating the lights we put on the tree. This year, as we were decorating the tree ( my year = white lights) my H made a comment about when we decide to have children we will just be using colored lights.......Okay back the truck up here, this is a whole new ball game we are talking about. I think it is weird enough we alternate every year but the thought of only colored lights for our children -hell -to the No !

I would love to hear how other couples get around this holiday issue !

TIA

kaederose

We have this!  We bought a pre-lit tree with white lights, but H grew up with white, red and green lights (weird, I know).  So our compromise is that he gets red lights in addition to my white.  I hate the green so those are just a too-bad-so-sad for him.  I figure I can try to eventually do a bit of a holly or peppermint theme with the bigger things like tree skirt, etc., that will bring out the best in the addition of color.

getitdone

Ugh - I totally get it! DH loves colored lights and I like white lights, so we do 2 trees. The tree upstairs is white lights and so are our outside lights. I decorate a tree in the basement (or as DH calls it - his man cave). The tree downstairs has colored lights and manly ornaments (sports, cards, nascar, fishing, etc).

festivegal2008

LOL I don't think the kids would care as long as there's presents for them under the tree! But in all seriousness, I grew up always having colored lights and my mom still to this day only uses colored lights. Luckily my H agrees with me that we like the clear lights better so that's what we go with every year. If it were up to him we wouldn't have a tree (he loves to say "bah humbug") so I get to decorated it any way I want. I'd say keep the tradition going the way you are now by rotating every year.

happylady5

just my opinion, but I think you're making a bigger deal out of this than it really is.  However, that said...I do understand the importance of tradition and I agree with you on using white lights vs colored.  I'm just not sure if it's worth the energy you're putting into it.

Is it possible for you to do two trees?  Maybe you could check out after Christmas sales to see if there's any tree deals.  That'd be my suggestion.  If that's not an option, just stick with the alternating colors from year to year and when kids come around, keep it that way too.

 

EastCoastBride

I dont' see why having kids stops the rotation.  Why does he get to trump you?  If he wants to stop the rotation, thats fine, but then he needs to make it white lights.....

tnrb

When the kids are old enough to pick, let them decide!  We did white some years and colored other years.  

Dyork

Me and H decided to have white lights on our tree, and we used multi-colored lights for the decorations. We figured the ornaments on the tree are already obnoxious colors, so white would probably tone that down a little bit.

NikiLynn

I don't like multi-color lights but H doesn't like only white lights.  To "compromise" in our living room (where guests would be) we have my beautifully decorated WHITE LIGHT tree and in our family room in our basement I have a 4 ft tree with multi-color lights and all the ugly/fun ornaments.  My reasoning and argument is that H and I spend majority of our time in the family room so he can see "his" tree most of the time.  I am "responsible" for decorating our house so I think it is up to me to decorate as I please.  That pretty much ends the arguing.

Disneygeek77

This is how my family handled it growing up.  We had two trees.  We had a pretty fancy tree in the front window with white lights and themed ornaments.  In the back of the house was our real tree or the tree where we put our presents.  This tree had the colored lights and all the homemade kid ornaments and other hodge podge ornaments that we collected over the years that wouldn't look right on the fancy tree anyways.  The fancy tree was real and my mom got it for a discount close to Christmas and the back tree was fake. 

Lilou902

I vote two trees.  This is what I plan to do when we have kids.  I have a tree that is my ONE very specific decorating that I do all year.  I only do white lights, red and gold balls, gold ribbon and a bow.  There are no special ornaments.  No first Christmas together, etc.  Just the red and gold balls.  Of course kids will make/recieve ornaments for a tree, so I plan to have a "formal" tree and a family tree. I would do the same with your DH.

ConyersHoney

Our compromise is White lights in all other decorations, but colored lights on the tree. When I grew up we had the huge bulb colored lights, H always had small white twinkle lights. So now we have small twinkle colored lights on the tree. 

sarahdtobe

DH and I agree on white lights, but we like the big colorful lights too!  Our tree is prelit though...white lights for us, for now.

jenniann87

Yup we just went through this the other night. We both grew up using colored lights. But last year I went out and bought white lights for our tree with blue ornaments. I wanted a "classic" look. Well this year when we were putting our tree up BF wanted to do colored lights but I wanted the white ones. I eventually won since we didnt have working colored ones for the tree. So we have white lights on the tree and colored ones outside.

AugustBrideCO

We used to have this fight. One year it got pretty nasty in the christmas aisle at Target lol. At some point he gave up and I now get my way every year (white lights). Anyway, in your situation I would recommend 2 trees: one pretty, perfect tree with white lights and matching ornaments and one "kid's tree" with colored lights, mishmash of handmade ornaments, tinsel, three stars and two angels, the whole enchilada. The family I knew who did this had the white lights tree in the living room and the kid tree in the finished basement. If we decided to have kids and do this, I'd have the white light tree in the dining room (there's a pretty bay window which is a beautiful spot for a tree) and the crazy tree in the living room.

trigal

The white vs. colored lights debate is one of the most absurd things I've ever heard.

I also think it's ridiculous that people think that colored lights are tacky.  Personally, I'm sick of seeing white lights all over town - can't people be more creative?

trigal

A.Hoyt:

the thought of only colored lights for our children -hell -to the No !

What if your kids only want colored lights?  Will you make this face to them?

hunnygirl

My dad did his tree this year with both white and colored lights. I like it that way!

Mrs.Rad888

happylady5:

just my opinion, but I think you're making a bigger deal out of this than it really is.  However, that said...I do understand the importance of tradition and I agree with you on using white lights vs colored.  I'm just not sure if it's worth the energy you're putting into it.

Is it possible for you to do two trees?  Maybe you could check out after Christmas sales to see if there's any tree deals.  That'd be my suggestion.  If that's not an option, just stick with the alternating colors from year to year and when kids come around, keep it that way too.

 

I'm really really not making fun of you, but am I the only one who sees the contradiction in these 2 statements?

DH and I use many many strands of lights--white, colored, twinkling, flashing, chasing and steady. Something for everyone!

A.Hoyt

Thank you for the advice. In addition to alternating lights we decided last night that if this year the tree has white lights then our outdoor lights will be colored. Then vice versa for the next year.

As far as when we have children we will let them decide b/c the holiday is more "magical" for them.

side note: H went out after this convo to purchase his colored lights and he came home with the big retro colored bulbs.......I just had to shrug and laugh !

 Again thank you for sharing, it is great knowing that  this battle is not just being fought in my house and yes I do know it's a kind of crazy topic to be writing about but I did learn many way to get around this situation.

Sagenhaft

Wow, I didn't even realize this was an issue. I change my mind a lot and I'm not 100% convinced that DH knows there are white lights and colored lights, so I just put up what I want. I'll count myself lucky on this one.

puppyluvr

Can you compromise with a set of mono colored lights? Our tree has 6 strings of blue lights on it. I love them!

mrssisler

Sorry, I had to LOL when I read this.

This sounds like DH & I. We argue all the time over stupid stuff like this, but for us it's real tree vs. fake. I always grew up with a real tree and he always refused, so we had to get an artificial one. 

We moved in June & got rid of the fake tree because we wouldn't have anywhere to store it. We got a real tree for that reason. SCORE!

I did a little happy dance as he was cutting the branches off the bottom secretly hoping it wasn't a PITA so we could have another one next year. 

We also argue over how to fold t-shits, so I'm not going to be much help here. 

My only suggestion would be to pick something neither of you grew up with...

mommalovex4

I think what you guys are doing now is fair and not sure why it would have to change once you have kids? have you ever thought about using a certain color on the tree and then the opposite on the outside of your house?

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ChristyDM82

We have two trees- one white and one multi.  Our outside decorations are a mix of both.