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OK to give 3 and 5 yr old nieces money for xmas?

My DH's brother has two daughters, aged 3 and 5. We never see them because they live in another state and also because his brother is kind of a jerk and doesn't really associate with anyone in the family. I send them gifts every year and we've always attended their birthday parties. The thing is we don't really know these girls at all and feel like we are just invited to things for the gifts. His brother and wife never come to anything we invite them to or they say they will and don't show up. Anyway, because we don't know them, I have no idea what the girls are into or need. This year I have a 6 month old and I'm barely able to juggle normal life things, nevermind christmas and I'm running out of time. Would it be ok to throw some money in a card and be done with it? TIA
After almost 5 years of ttc, 2 miscarriages, one lost tube and IVF, we were blessed with an amazing little boy!! Pregnancy Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker imageimageimage

Re: OK to give 3 and 5 yr old nieces money for xmas?

  • I'd put dh in charge, personally.

    Money is ok - - I'd tell dh to buy a savings bond or gift card to Target.

  • Money is fine.  But you could also try a Build a Bear gift card or Disney Store gift card.  That way, it is more than just cash- it is something they can look forward to later!
  • I personally don't think it's a big deal. But I'm not a person who thinks that money/gift cards are impersonal (I know some people on these boards feel that way, which is fine).

    Another option ... maybe a gift card to Toys r' Us, the movies, Cold Stone Creamery, Build-a-Bear, etc.?

    image
  • Ditto putting your dh in charge this year.  I'd give money, a bookstore gift card or a couple of books each.
  • I agree. Put DH in charge but a gc to a kid friendly place would be really nice. Disney store, kids clothing, build a bear, or something of the sort.
    image
    imageBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Thanks, a gift card would be a good option. They live in the middle of nowhere but I'm sure I could find something.

    After almost 5 years of ttc, 2 miscarriages, one lost tube and IVF, we were blessed with an amazing little boy!! Pregnancy Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker imageimageimage
  • I would give a savings bond.  If I wanted to be extra sweet, I might get them each an outfit from Target or Gap (putting the gift receipt inside) to go with the bond.
  • While I think that money and giftcards are perfectly acceptable for teens and adults, I think it's weird and a lazy cop-out for young children. Send some coloring books or something.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • I would say a GC to build a bear, or Toys R Us. That way since he is a jerk the money goes towards something for them and not something possibly for him. Some people think like that.
  • As a Mom, I would appreciate it.  The cash would go directly into their college funds.  If they are like my kids, they already have all the toys and clothes they need and really don't need anything else. A gc for a special activity like pp's suggested would also be nice.

  • Send a good children's book to each girl.  Start building a small library of classics and award-winners.
    "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means." Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
  • There's nothing wrong with money.  Not as much fun for them (especially if it gets put into a college/savings account), but usually appreciated by the parents since kids have so many toys (especially if it gets put into a college/savings account).

    Kids that age love gift cards.  My 4 year old is getting one to Target, her favorite store in the world, from my parents this year.  The look on her face when I tell her she gets to shop there will be priceless.  Now, for a while, whenever we go there and she asks for something, I can tell her that she can get it if she wants to use her "credit card". 

    And, as a pp said, you can never (at least not in my opinion!) go wrong with books.  No kid can have too many of those. 

  • a gift card is fine, but i would probably just go by the dollar store and stock up on stuff they'd like.  coloring books, crayons, fun pencils and erasers, books, princess dress up stuff, etc.  my niece is 3, and i recently bought her a tiara, a feather boa, a pink purse, some stickers, some art supplies, sparkly bracelets, etc., to put in her christmas bag.  
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  • I think gift cards are just fine.  When my youngest was six he got a gift card to DairyQueen and he really got a kick out of treating the entire family to ice cream.  Any of the stores mentioned above would be great, as well as a fast food restaurant.  Sounds nasty (the fast food, I mean), but my in-laws give the kids cards to McDonald's for birthdays, and it is pretty cool.  I hate spending money at places like that, yet kids absolutely love it!
  • I give a book or books and a gift card to Barnes and Noble.  These are two small children 3&5 that love books and that I know very well.  Their parents would rather them have books than more toys:)

    Last year they each got a Eric Carle book (seahorse one and hermit crab one) and a stuffed seahorse and hermit crab to go along with it.  They also got a small B&N gift card since they like to pick their own too.

    Cricket's Cadence
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I would do a gift card to a child friendly place rather than cash.  Simply because if BIL is as big of a jerk as you say he is, then I would be concerned about him taking the cash.  If it were GC to build-a-bear then you know the girls would enjoy and BIL wouldn't spend it on himself. JMO.
    Blog: Not to be Koi

    Sara, Friend?
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    glove slap. I don't take crap.
  • I think money is as long as you think the kids will be able to buy presents.
  • Reading the thread title before the actual post, I was giong to say my personal opinion is no money for little kids because I'm sure they'd much rather get toys or something they can unwrap.

    But to answer your question, I would also opt for the gift card for Toys R Us / Build a Bear / Borders. That way you know the gifts are going towards the KIDS and that SIL/BIL aren't spending the money on something they need for themselves. KWIM?

    My H always insists on getting a Toys R Us gift card for his great nephew (also his god son) but he's only 2 1/2 and his nephew lives locally.  I always argue H that the kid would probably much rather unwrap a present as opposed to a gift card, which IMO, are much more appealing to teenagers than toddlers.  But my H hates shopping and says, "B&M can use it for what they need." Last year they used it for diapers - how is that an actual Christmas present for the boy??  Personally I don't think it's fair, but it's his family so I guess I just have to sit back and keep my arguments to myself.

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  • imagecarolineh:

    As a Mom, I would appreciate it.  The cash would go directly into their college funds.  If they are like my kids, they already have all the toys and clothes they need and really don't need anything else. A gc for a special activity like pp's suggested would also be nice.

     I agree. Our little ones have MOUNTAINS of clothes and toys. My family has started giving money to put into their education funds, or to be used towards something that makes the most sense. For example, we're moving this year so some of their Christmas and b'day money will likely go towards a playcentre at the new house...that sort of thing. Just something other than more stuff.

  • We see our neices and nephew ALL the time and we are getting them saving bonds and a small gift just because they already have way more than they would ever need!
    ~basquing in the wedded bliss~
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