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sleep vent :(
I feel like I have failed in the sleep department as a mother this time around 
Liam has so many little crutches he needs to sleep that I don't even know where to start with sleep training. He is swaddled (well we took that away yesterday), he uses a pacifier, he needs to be swayed/bounced/rocked by me (and only me) to fall asleep, he has a white noise machine, he wakes and wants to eat (or comfort nurse) all.night.long, he likes to sleep in bed occasionally, oh and he naps in his swing......this is all my fault.
I don't even know where to start to help him learn better sleep habits. I used CIO with Grace but she was already a pretty good sleeper she just could not initially sooth herself to sleep and didn't have nearly as many little sleep issues as Liam does. I took away the swaddle last night and it has been awful. I got 3 hours of broken up sleep, acutally the most I have slept in a row since Thanksgiving is 2-3 hours. It is making us all miserable. I will use CIO with him but should I just go cold turkey and take everything he is used to away at once?? or one at a time and then do CIO? ugh.
He has already been up 3 times tonight 
Re: sleep vent :(
And to give you a little perspective, I remember you saying when Grace was around this age about how you had to keep a blow dryer on all night because it was the only thing that would stop her from crying. I know that was miserable too at the time, but she got over that stage and is a wonderful, sweet, almost 3 year old who is a great sleeper now. It absolutely stinks when you are going through it, but it will pass. It is so easy to blame ourselves for everything that is wrong with our children. You are a great mom who loves her little ones and are doing great!
PS: Can't wait to see you so I can hold Liam for a bit and give your arms a break
(((BIG hugs))) sleep deprivation is the worst and it really does affect everyone in the family
(. I used to want to strangle DH for being able to sleep while I dealt w/ it because Jake would go to sleep for no one but me. You're not alone.
I'm sure you've read my posts about how horrible Jake was at sleeping until we finally Ferberized him at 11 mos (I was determined to sleep before his 1st bday!). The bad sleep started w/ teething w/ him around 6 mos, and he'd wake every 1-2 hours every night, and needed to be rocked/bounced/nursed to go back to sleep. He also self-weaned from the paci at this time (which I actually was sad about because it helped so much!). He would fight sleep every time and it sucked. Anyway, I can't remember what my Ferber book said, but my gut tells me to let him keep the paci at least while he's CIO - you may want to Google it.
I would sleep train asap if I were you. Take it from my experience - it only got worse over time and caused so many marital issues and made me crazy - I've vowed to nip sleep issues in the bud with Baby Girl!!
Jake blowing out the candle at Katie's coming home party
Katie Belle
Kristen, Chad, Jake, Katie & Sadie the Wonderdog, est. 6/17/06
:::huge hugs:::
Uh, this is the one thing that keeps me completely anxious about baby 2. It was the worst aspect of having a baby and I'm terrified of round two.
That said, I wouldn't take it all away. I think the pacifier is important in teaching them how to soothe themselves. I would actually allow him the crutches and after he is in a sleeping pattern begin to ween those things away. We never really took Luke's crutches away and although we were not a good case of nipping it in the butt early on, Luke still sleeps with a pacifier and I don't mind at all.
Usually its out his mouth as soon as he falls asleep, but on some nights its a crutch not only for him, but us. Once they get into the pattern of "this is sleep time" then I think they can start to get it without all the other items.
good luck. Remember, the CIO will make it better in the end. I know it is the crappiest thing in the world to endure.
I don't have anything to offer for advice. I'm taking notes though because I'm afraid of what will happen when we try to move Abe into the crib in the nursery.
Big hugs Carly!
First off (((hugs))). That amount of sleep is just painful! I'm almost positive Ferber says you can just go cold turkey and make the change all at once, but I don't have advice on if/when you need to cut the paci and swaddle.
For cutting back on night nursing, Ferber has a section that talks about that and it's a bit different because you don't want to starve them all night long - he says to gradually stretch the time between nursing sessions (add 30 minutes each night). We did this with Lily and there was sometimes a lot of crying, but it worked in a few days.
FWIW, Lillian STILL naps in the swing - she used to sleep in the swing at night too, but we were able to get her to sleep in the crib at night. Not so much for naps :P Oh, and we still use white noise because our house is really loud.
Anyway, I feel like I just rambled and didn't offer any real advice - I'd probably just focus on night sleep and put him down for the night w/out bouncing/rocking him and let him CIO, not bring him into bed anymore, and gradually cut back on the nursing sessions at the same time.
When we were doing this, I was so freaking tired that DH was willing to trade off the monitor with me so only one of us had to listen to her cry and the other could sleep (we slept in separate rooms). If he had the monitor and it was time for her to nurse, he would come and get me..
Sometimes I read these posts and feel totally clueless(I just had to look up Ferber and CIO) but am glad you all have dicussions about it. It's a great learning experience.
I did want to say that I hope things work out for you soon!
Thanks girls!! I do plan to keep the paci. I talked to the nurse at his pedi office today and she said "he is hungry give him cereal" Ok. But he wakes even when he is not hungry......what the heck do I do then? I asked her and she said to sooth him.....? So last night he went down at 6:30 after I fed him and woke up at 7:15, 8:15, 9:15 and then I broke down and swaddled him
and he did a 4 hour stretch. Then woke every 2 hours. I will try the cereal tonight, I have no idea how this child could be hungry since he eats all the freaking time but it is worth a shot!!
MIT~ I was just reading that part of ferbers book about night feeding, I will give that a try tonight. Ideally I would love for him to STTN!! but I don't mind nursing him once even twice if those are the only times he wakes up.
I will update tomorrow.......pray to the STTN Gods for me