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hosting - is this bad form?
So my husband and I decided to host a party for some of my coworkers. Out of the people we are inviting (only 4), only 1 has a child - a 6-year-old ball of energy.
Now, normally, I love kids, however - our apartment is VERY small (about 650 sq ft. total), we have a lot of glass (tables, low-set wine glasses and caraffes, etc..), and the meal we will be serving has open flames (fondue).
I want to make a blanket statement "I'm sorry, but out apartment is not child-friendly" - which, even if it is a blanket statement is obviously aimed at this one person, because they are the only one with kids. But it's true, I just wouldn't feel safe having kids in our apartment, especially with a lot of people there, and open flames around!
Is this bad form? I feel bad, but I'm not sure what else to do...
Re: hosting - is this bad form?
A good guest would ask if children were invited but we all know not every guest is a good guest.
I'd bring it up just to the parents--pull them aside one day and let them know your concerns--don't say "I think your kid is going to break all my stuff" but "I'm wondering if you were planning to bring little Charlie--our home is not very child-friendly and I'm not sure what to do to entertain him or feed him."
If your co-worker takes offense to this, that's her problem. It shouldn't be offensive to be concerned about what to do with one kid.
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I would be direct, but address it with the parent individually as it's obvious that it's directed at her and no one else in the group.
I would just say "We're hoping to have a relaxed gathering with adults only"
I wouldnt say the above because it opens you up to the parent saying "Oh Charlie is really well behaved and he loves all kinds of new foods!"
I agree with this. Esp about little Charlie being good and wanting to try new foods. Ugh, some parents are so clueless.
"Jill, we were really hoping to make this adults only, I'm hoping you don't mind. We've got a glass coffee table and lots of breakables - our house is just not child friendly and it's SO small."
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hehe - the parents might be clueless about "Charlie" being well-behaved (I've only met her twice, and she was not bad, just high-strung both times), but I'd probably laugh in her (coworker's) face if she told me "Charlie" liked to try new foods...I've seen this kid eat, she's the pickiest eater I know!
Thanks for the suggestion, I'll talk to coworker
This. If I said anything, it would be a casual statement to DH's co-worker along the lines of, "I bet you're looking forward to a nice night out without the kids, right?" Guys can say things like this to eachother.
Also, please don't mention your coffee table, the size of your apartment, or breakables, I'm not that sensitive, but would be insulted.
oh no - I'd never mention the reasons I didn't want kids there (except the safety issue of open flames - which I think is a legitimate concern).
I'm going to wait and see if she's even available to come that evening, and then I'll talk to her.