Family Matters
vjcjenn1
member
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Tigersi
How did it go?
Re: Tigersi
Thanks for asking vjcjenn1!
It went surprisingly well. H was very honest and up front about everything. I made sure I chose a counselor who is well versed in counseling in cases of abuse and I'm really happy with him. Granted it was only one appointment, but it was strange when we left, although I cried like a baby through most of the appointment, I left feeling energized. We rode in the car from the appointment back to work together (his idea, not mine) and I was expecting him to have some hurt feelings and let them out, but we really just expanded on what the counselor said and came to a couple of agreements that I think will help us out in the long run. I was pleasantly surprised! Our next appointment is on the 8th.
The counselor at one point looked at H and said "Anger Management Counseling for you is a must. You will not be successful in your marriage without it." YEAH!!!
We did have a talk after I got home from work later and he said he was really hurt that I thought he might be willing to just give up on us. He felt like I had labled him a quitter and he's not. We were able to actually have a REAL heartfelt conversation without either of us getting upset and with both of us actively listening to what the other was saying. I don't remember the last time that really happened!
I am more hopeful than I was yesterday morning. But still very cautious. This was only one appointment, and there will be many more. Many more opportunities for him to exploit my weaknesses and use them against me, many more opportunities for him to have hurt feelings and get mad. It's going to be a long road for both of us, I think. But no matter what the end result for us as a couple, I'm confident that we will both learn something about ourselves that will help us be better people in the future.
Just mindboggling. After the way he has treated you for years, after the way he was unwilling to do anything to stop being a $hitbag until you threatened to walk, he has the nerve to be hurt that you don't have much faith in him?