September 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
I judge....
Grandmothers who wear leggings.
I know leggings are a split topic on this board, but I love them. However, when your kids have had kids, it's time to give it up. I have a co-worker whose fashion choices makes me look like this 
at least 3 times a week. When it's warmer this same person wears spaghetti straps. 1) This is an elementary school, following a dress code. 2) I hate to tell you this, but you're sorta old.
What do you judge? We haven't done one of these in a while.
Re: I judge....
I judge mom's who are condescending toward women who don't have children.
For example: They'll say things like "Oh you don't understand because you don't have kids..." "You can't be that busy! You don't have kids yet!" - Yes, these are things I've heard IRL.
I also judge people who post those damn statuses on FB that are like "I'm a counselor, a doctor, a chef, a teacher, etc, etc, I'm a MOM and that makes me the best evarrrrr!" Ok I exaggerated the end, but that's the impression I get when I read something like that. It just annoys me I guess...I don't really know why!
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I judge people who put TMI about their kids on FB. For example, an acquaintance (sp?) of mine keeps posting about how her 1 year old son has an undescended testicle and needs surgery but they don't want to put him through it. I"m like HELLO! In 20 years, people are still going to be able to find the crap that you posted online about your kid's testicle.
On a related note, I judge people who can't afford to have one parent SAH, but do anyway. The same person I was talking about above is a SAHM to two kids, a 6 year old girl and a 1 year old boy. The dad makes about $28k per year (which is a decent income down here for one person, but not enough to support a family of 4.). They are on WIC, the kids are on government health insurance, the parents don't have health insurance. They homeschool the girl and plan to do so with the boy as well. The reason I know all this, and the reason I judge, is because this person posts all this on FB, and constantly complains about never having any money, how they're always broke, how they need more WIC assistance now that the 1 year old is eating more. Um, hello? Get a JOB.
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I also judge people who put too much info about anything on FB. My BFF made a remark this morning like "whoa, to show hwo tired I am, I just put my thong on backwards!" I know I've confessed here to doing this, but I woudl haev never put that on FB.
I judge people who refuse to learn how to cook even the basics. I know not everyone wants to learn to be an expert, nor do I think everyone has to learn at that level. But I judge those who refuse to learn to follow a recipe to cook for their families and just eat fast food and take out all the time. Learn to provide healthy food for your family FFS.
I agree with judging the TMI Facebookers. I'm friends with far too many of those.
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I judge a lot of things people do- especially for attention.
I judge people who jump headlong into decisions without even thinking it through.
I judge people who waste money on things like manicures, wine and going out to dinner or on trips (even to see family) when they can't pay their bills. You can cut out ALL of those things. I don't feel bad for you.
Stand up for something you believe in.
THIS! Except I'll have to change it to pot, beer and electronics/video games. One of Joel's friends cries broke ALL the time, he doesn't even have a car! I don't understand where all his money goes because he's a single guy, in a non-expensive apartment with no cable, no internet, heat & electric are included in his rent, no credit cards, no car so no car insurance or payments...I don't get it. He's 28, GROW UP!
I am right there with you- dont tell me how to feed my child, just worry about yours. I dont think I would last in a LLL meeting. I know I am far too opinionated for them.
on the legging topic- I judge those who thing they are pants... not just under things but actual pants. I have witnessed 5 people in the last week of all shapes and sizes wearing them as pants with a short shirt. I dont care what your figure looks like- its not acceptable.
I also judge people who dont speak up for themselves. I spent from 7:30 am until 11 am this morning trying to talk to groups of people about their happiness in the workplace (just one of my lovely hats here at my job) and they all didnt feel they could voice their opinions. well then dont b*tch. I cant help you if you dont want to help yourself.
:Blog:
My MIL bought a pair of jeggings and was telling me how much she loves them last night. She's not grandmother yet- but she will be any day. She's also 6' and 130lbs, so she can pull them off. And she only wears them with long shirts/ coats.
I judge her more for the Avril Lavigne brand shirt with built in vest and tie she likes to wear.
Stand up for something you believe in.
hahahaha.
yeah, I have nothing to add, that just made me lol.
- also people who say they are broke yet get their nails and hair done. ESPECIALLY if these people have children. you cant offord stuff for your kid but you can get your hair cut and colored?
- people who gladly push work off on others yet take credit for it anyway
- people who practice open marriages and polygamy
- people who swear at their children, especially in public
I'll be honest, and this is going to make me widely unpopular I'm sure...but I am kind of guilty of this judge...BUT only when people choose not to breastfeed because they think its "yucky" or they don't want it to ruin their boobs, and never even give it a try for those reasons. To me that screams immature and selfish and makes me question if they're ready to have a baby. I totally DO NOT judge women who cannot breastfeed due to low supply or other medical issues, had issues with latching which was causing too much stress for both mom and baby, or just tried and decided they wanted to do formula instead. I guess the difference to me is at least they tried or wanted to try. But I totally agree with you on the older breastfeeders too...anything over a year to me just seems weird, IMHO.
I also judge people who choose to have a c-section over a vaginal birth, the first time around. I know its because they think it will be easier than labor or they don't want their lady to be forever changed, but seriously, its a full on surgical procedure that comes with its own special set or risks and recovery and I just don't understand why someone would purposely subject themselves to it unless they truly had not other choice.
ETA: I should add though, with the breastfeeding judge...I would never actually tell someone that I think they should breastfeed...this is one of those silent judges that I keep to myself, because I know its my opinion and no matter what I think I don't need to impose it on someone else
I get that BF judge. I want to BF and I'm working really hard to make it so we can do just BFing and no formula because I did NOT want to use formula at all. However, given our circumstances, mostly due to Alex being three weeks early and being so tiny he couldn't afford to lose any more weight (as it was he lost a little over a pound). BF is exhausting but I feel like it's well worth it based on all the studies done of all the benefits.
As for the c-seciton. I also do not understand choosing to schedule a c-section when it's not medically necessary. However, having just had one, I don't know if I just have a high pain tolerance or if keeping a positive outlook has helped or both, but honestly the recovery has been a breeze. It is major surgery and prior to having it done I even posted about how terrified I was about the possibility of having to have one. Now granted, I've obviously never experienced vaginal birth, but the c-section was really easy and having to take it easy has been the hardest thing for me. This does NOT mean I will schedule a c-section for our second child (even though they're going to push for me to do so), I'm definitely committed to trying a VBAC, especially since my OB took the extra time doing special stitches to give me the best possible shot of a VBAC which I was thought was amazing of her.
However, that being said, I feel like I was robbed of the delivery I wanted since a c-section is basically the exact opposite of an all natural med-free vaginal delivery.
ETA: Despite not having the delivery I wanted, I am really happy that my lady bits are still intact
Just trying to find
all the little silver linings in the situation 
I strongly agree with this!
While we're at it, I also judge:
-people in open relationships.
-people who homeschool. (sorry I know that's flammable)
-people who stay at home once their kids are in school. Being a SAHM is great. Once they start kindergarten, get a freaking job.
I totally agree!
UGH.
I judge people like my BFF - work under the table, make more money than we do, have less bills than we do, and gets free health insurance and government assistance because technically, she doesn't make any money. Why the hell isn't the government telling her to get a job?!
I judge people who bury their heads in the sand. My mom's company has no retirement package, isn't paying her as much as they should and screws her over, in general. She needs to stop thinking about everybody else, think about her future and get herself a better job/company - will she do that? NO. Not even when I find her the jobs myself. Like, what's her long term plan?
I also judge moms who judge other moms. Why don't men do this?
I judge people who are sexist, racist, homophobes ALWAYS.
Oh, and going with the whole grandma and jeggings thing - I totally judge people (particularly older women) who dress far far younger than they are. Like..say..my 54 year old mom who dresses like shes 20. Seriously, I'm 29 and I don't dress like I'm 20. I mean, you don't have to dress in muumuus or anything but a belted mini dress, tights, and knee-high boots...really?
I also agree with this one! SIL is like this and it drives me crazy. She's 36, has 2 kids, and she never ever cooks. They eat take out or make "paninis" (white bread, ham, and cheese smushed on the George Foreman) every night.
I also judge people who let their kids being extremely picky eaters. A little pickyness is understandable, but some family friends let their child subsist on peanut butter and vanilla pudding for 5 years (not exaggerating). SIL's daughter is 9. I've never seen her eat anything that wasn't white or yellow. Ever. When we go to the beach for a week and all cook, she eats cereal and maybe a roll.
ooooh yes! Good one. There is no such thing as a picky eater. That only means that there are pushover parents who don't know how to say "nope, this is what's for dinner."
I will say, I disagree with this sometimes, because sometimes the kids have issues that you can't see. For example, my sister is autistic and she has serious issues with texture- she is a vegetarian because of this.
My mom didn't cook for her desires for a while, but eventually, when it became clear this was a life choice and not a phase- she started either making 2 meals (I'm a total carnivore) or making things that she would eat. 16 years later, she's still on that kick, so I'm pretty sure it is going to stay.
Stand up for something you believe in.
see now that I can understand. but I think 99% of the time, this is not the case.
Agreed. Just not ALL parents are push overs because of they cook to their kids' eating habits.
Stand up for something you believe in.
fair enough. I stand corrected
Agreed - mostly. Like Mary said, there are exceptions.
Is she married? Does her husband cook?
If he does, then problem solved.
If he doesn't, then why aren't you judging him? Why shouldn't fathers have to cook?
I disagree.
The only thing I judge about polygamy is when they use it to defraud the state - welfare fraud. Other than that, I think polygamy can be very healthy and beneficial for the children. I firmly believe that you can not get ALL your needs, both emotional and physical, satisfied by just one person. Having sister wives, or multiple wives, or multiple mothers, allows more of these needs to get met. It also makes sure that the children are well taken care of (multiple moms) and they have a big family to grow up with.
And, open marriages - just like homosexuality, if it doesn't affect you than why does it bother you?
I agree with the TMI facebook judging, and the totally righteous "You're not a MOM so you don't GET IT" comments.
I also judge people who abuse the health care system, which I see just about every day I work. And the people who are conveniently allergic to every pain medication except the really strong narcotics.
And I judge the people who come into the ER to be seen for nausea and vomiting or abdominal pain, and they're eating a cheeseburger and drinking Mountain Dew when we check them in. It really makes your argument that "I haven't been able to eat in three days!!!" seem a little less plausible.
Congrats to both my TTC buddies, Amberley18 and sb2006 on their beautiful babies!