West Coast Florida Nesties
Baby Macy is here!
12/09 - Macy (daughter) | 4/10 - Began TTC Baby #2 | 12/10 - Chemical Pregnancy | 1/12 - Miscarriage at 14 weeks | DX - PCOS & Hyperthyroidism
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Moms to toddlers, I have a question
How do you handle tantrums (and please don't tell me that your child is perfect and never had one!)? Lately, Macy has been a pill. I keep scratching my head wondering what happened to my sweet baby.
I have tried hugging her (but I am questioning if this is positive reinforcement), getting down at her level and calmly talking to her, flat out telling her to stop (in a non-yelling way), walking out of the room, you name it. I am hoping this is a phase.
Also, what sort of activities do you do with your toddler? I think I need to shake things up around here. We need new things to do! I have tried Googling ideas but the ideas I did find weren't winners.
Baby Macy is here!
12/09 - Macy (daughter) | 4/10 - Began TTC Baby #2 | 12/10 - Chemical Pregnancy | 1/12 - Miscarriage at 14 weeks | DX - PCOS & Hyperthyroidism
Re: Moms to toddlers, I have a question
First of all, I can't believe all of her teeth! She looks like such a little angel in that picture.
Secondly, you're not alone. Alana has been testing me lately as well. I know she's just trying to exert her independence and test how far she can push me, but I'm not sure what to do either. I've tried everything you've mentioned plus just ignoring her when she does that. Reasoning doesn't work because well, she's 14 months, affection sometimes works (but like you said I wonder if I'm reinforcing), and ignoring her sometimes works. I'm frustrated too and don't know what to do!!
Several people have told me to put her in a "time out". I haven't done it because I don't think it would be effective for a 14 month old, but how would I know, right? I'm hoping it's just a phase too...
Good luck! I'll be looking at the responses too.
Distractions.....if Ava wants something she can't have or it isn't a good time, we usually offer up something up else equally appealing to her. If that doesn't work and she wants to throw a hissy anyway we get her attention, tell her to "look at us" (eye contact) and calmly talk to her. She's pretty good about understanding and I think instilling the eye contact for us has helped with discipline. At home if she is just being tired and cranky we just ignore any fits she has unless she's throwing things or hitting, then we go back to square one.
Activities - I color with her, run around the yard, go swimming, do crafts, go shopping, go on walks in the neighborhood. She's also in gymnastics twice per week and Gymboree one day. I schedule something for every day so we're getting out of the house too.
First off...awesome siggy pic! She's just too cute!
As far as the tantrums go I have always been told to ignore them. Cameron is the worst with them. He usually only does them when we are at home (Thank God) and he does this screaming thing so I just don't look at him, let him work through it and usually when he is done he will come over to me and want a hug. Then I can talk to him somewhat rationally and try and explain why he got in trouble and what he did wrong. Not sure if it's working but it seems to be the best thing for us.
This age is very challenging. They are really testing you and seeing how far they can take things and it makes us mommies crazy!
From day one, when DD wasn't listening or wanted to throw a tantrum, we've made her sit. She knows that if we tell her to sit, she has to plop her tush on the floor immediately. Sometimes she cries more when she sits, but more often than not it (1) stops the behavior we don't like and (2) makes her regroup. I don't make her sit more than 2 minutes, but they usually help her focus on the prize - getting up and playing.
When she is done crying/whining/whatever, she knows she gets a hug and we can go play.
Time out were working really well for us, never did you have to be there X number of time, just the, are you ready to do xzy now? and if it was yes then he was out, if it was a no then he stayed, and if he went back to doing whatever got him there in the 1st place it was back in the corner. More of a break from the bad behavior than a punishment
It worked for about a yr and a half and now that he is just about 3, it's not working so great so we are trying to come up w/ new ideas. ugh.
Max 4-08-08 and Michael 2-03-91 (19 years olds)
Baby Macy is here!
12/09 - Macy (daughter) | 4/10 - Began TTC Baby #2 | 12/10 - Chemical Pregnancy | 1/12 - Miscarriage at 14 weeks | DX - PCOS & Hyperthyroidism
Amen! Mine are just starting to throw little tantrums, especially when one steals a toy from the other or wrestles the other to the ground.... oh the joys of twins!
My child is a DRAMA QUEEN, so I can sympathize.
As a younger toddler, we found distraction/redirection to be the most effective. Things have changed drastically, and we're in full-blown timeouts/in your room stuff now. Yuck.
Generally, I've had the best luck in trying to get cooperation (getting dressed, diaper change, etc.) if I can make a game of it and be silly somehow. Like sometimes I'll let her try to put my pajamas on me, and then it's much easier to put hers on.
Activities....mostly the stuff that others have mentioned. Art stuff is great - crayons, play doh, paint, etc. All washable versions, of course. We go to the park a lot. She loves to sing and dance so we'll do that sometimes, too, now that she's a little older. (She's about 2.5) She loves singing 5 little monkeys, itsy bitsy spider, ABCs, if you're happy and you know it, etc.
Right now, she's really into pretend everything, which I can use to my advantage a lot. Like when we go to the grocery store, we pretend to find birds flying around, then they land on us, we talk about what color they are, and then they fly away. Stuff like that. Or if I want her to get in the car with me, I'll give her her pink binoculars and tell her we're going on a flower safari, and we drive wherever looking for flowers. She forgets about that about 10 seconds after we're in the car, lol, but it gets her in the car and that's what I wanted.
My silly Lily is almost 4.