Pity Party/Vent-Tell Me I'm Overreacting

GermanGirl2007

Ok, ok I KNOW that I am overreacting, but perhaps I am just a bit emotional, so I am going to vent.

I haven't seen my husband in 36 days (but who's counting?), and it will be another 3 months until we are living in the same state again.  I realize that in the grand scheme of things, this is really not a very long time, but it still sucks.  I still get lonely, and I am now doing all the same things that need to be done for a household, but without the help of my DH.  Plus, I am dealing with all that is involved with a major move accross country, by myself.  Packing, home repairs, apartment hunting, forwarding mail, etc. I'm doing it by myself.  I am going to go ahead and pat myself on the back because I am doing a pretty good job.

I have been really amazed by the number of people that have offered to help.  Many people that I never even expected. This means SO much to me, and I am definitely taking people up on their offers.

However, I feel really let down by my family right now.  None of them have called me to see how I am doing, ask if I need help, etc.  My dad is awesome and has been helping me, but other than that, if I didn't call them, I don't know that I would ever hear from them.  My sister just had a baby a couple of weeks ago, so I know that a lot of their attention is focused on her, but I wasn't getting a lot of offers for help before that, and now I honestly feel like everyone but my dad has forgotten about me.  I have called ALL of them, and had phone calls un-returned.  And these are NOT even phone calls asking for help. They are phone calls asking to hang out because I am lonely. I guess I am just surprised that the people that I am closest with have been the least interested in spending time together in the few months before I leave, or have even offered to help.

And yes, I probably sound whiney and spoiled. I am just feeling a little emotional and let down. Now go ahead and tell me to relax.

Janell's Nest

I can completely relate to this since my DH travels about 40 weeks a year for work...and it is hard to manage a whole household (and two dogs and a kid for me anyway) by yourself.  We've struggled a lot because of it, just because he's gone so much and I learned to be self sufficient sometimes he feels like I don't need him because I know how to do everything and get what needs to be done done...even though I really really need him!

Perhaps your family is just bummed about you leaving and don't know what to say because maybe they'd like to change your mind but know it won't happen.  I wish I knew what to tell you on that front other then just being honest with them, but if they're not returning phone calls its hard to do.

 Sorry you're going through this and know you aren't the only one!!

anitalynn

I can see how you are bummed.. at the same time, I think you just need to be direct and tell them how you feel. They could be busy - they could be 'in denial' that you are leaving - they could be clueless about your feelings. Until you just directly talk to them, you won't know.

*hugs*

GermanGirl2007

Janell's Nest:

I can completely relate to this since my DH travels about 40 weeks a year for work...and it is hard to manage a whole household (and two dogs and a kid for me anyway) by yourself.  We've struggled a lot because of it, just because he's gone so much and I learned to be self sufficient sometimes he feels like I don't need him because I know how to do everything and get what needs to be done done...even though I really really need him!

Perhaps your family is just bummed about you leaving and don't know what to say because maybe they'd like to change your mind but know it won't happen.  I wish I knew what to tell you on that front other then just being honest with them, but if they're not returning phone calls its hard to do.

 Sorry you're going through this and know you aren't the only one!!

It sucks that you are in the same boat....I have 2 dogs too, and I don't think people necessarily understand the stress that can be involved in that.....especially when one of them has severe seperation anxiety.  It just adds a whole other layer of stress.  I should probably just talk to my family about it.  I am sure it isn't intentional, they aren't those kind of people, but maybe they just haven't given a lot of thought to how I might feel. I think it is harder because I really hate asking for help....I LIKE to be self-sufficient.  If my family offered to help or checked in on me, I guess it would be an easier way to admit that yes, this is really hard on me.  But that is my own stubbornness, and I am definitely having to get over it.

Thanks to both of you for the encouragement. It really really means a lot.