Holidays
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
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Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Mother's Day gift-giving
Is it just me, or are lots of holidays becoming gift-giving events lately? Don't get me wrong- I love my mother and MIL! I'm not trying to withhold gifts from them for Mother's Day. But my dad called me today to let me know that my mom had "mentioned" to him that if were "at all thinking or planning on a gift" for Mother's Day, then here were the things she would like. I'm not necessarily put off by her comments (we usually ask one another for suggestions/wants/needs during birthday or holiday time anyway), but rather by the fact that EVERYTHING seems to be a gift-giving event nowadays. Heck, we were even asked to contribute to a gift for Administrative Professionals Day for the office staff at work and for Nurse's Day next week! What ever happened to a heartfelt card? Can't I just take my mom and MIL to a nice breakfast? You know that whatever we spend on one, we have to spend on the other, and we both still have grandmother's alive and well who live nearby and deserve some acknowledgement, too. Then father's day is around the corner, and soon Flag Day.... now I'm just being silly 
Re: Mother's Day gift-giving
For mother's day, usually there is a tradition in your household. Did you never give your mom gifts, and now she is asking for one?
When I was growing up, we always gave gifts to my mom and grandmom. In our house, we spent the most on Christmas, second most on birthdays, and then we gave a token gift for mother's and father's day (plants, a scarf, earrings, etc.). So giving a gift to "grandma" is nothing new to me, and neither is giving a gift to my mom. I am not spending any more on my mom just b/c I am making more - - her days of active parenting are done!
You can always do what you want, even if everyone else is giving gifts. It may feel strange to "buck the trend," but if DH's family spends $100 on a Mother's Day gift, your mom gets a $20 gift, and you are out of money, you can tell both moms that you aren't in a position to give big gifts, and write them a card, do something home-made, or buy them flowers.
I get what you are saying. I am not an huge gift giver. I think it's the thought that counts. My mom is not that way at all. She doesn't make a lot of money but every holiday has to be a big show of generosity. She says it's because she "loves" us. I hate that. It makes me feel weird when openning her gifts that are way too much. My MIL on the other hand is not at all generous(which is totally ok with me.) But she herself is a mooch and likes to get big gifts. She is the type to tell you what someone else gave her and it always feels like a gift comparison. She will kinda make a face if she doesn't like a gift or something. She also makes little comments if she doesn't like where you take her out to eat.
For Mother's Day this year we had only planned on taking them to a really nice brunch, but no gifts. I have had a lot of preterm labor problems, so I have been on bedrest for the past 7 weeks. Mother's Day will be my first day out without restrictions. Too bad my mom decided to already give me an early mother's day gift and now I feel out gifted. And I'm technically not even a mother yet... guess I am the worst daughter ever.
I think that taking them out for a nice brunch or dinner is a good plan - in place of a gift. I think it would depend on what the person would enjoy. I always ask my mother what she would like for Mother's Day. Last year in place of a gift we, my sister and I, opted to take out the family for brunch - about eight of us total. This year we are opting for gifts, both joint gifts. She is putting in more for our mother and I am putting in more for our grandmother.
I think it all depends on the dynamics of the family. My sister's in-laws would prefer to go out to eat than receive gifts.