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Finally Good News!! (And a big long diatribe first, sorry.)
I have been having just a freaking rotten time lately. In November I had emergency surgery for gallstones stuck in a duct and I didn't even have a gall bladder, it had been removed 10 years before! Just my luck that I beat the ridiculous odds for some weird syndrome. So I got a call from my doctor to rush to the emergency room because my liver was failing and a surgical team was standing by waiting for me.
I finally recover from that and I find out that I have very unusual stomach polyps. I go through that whole biopsy procedure, spend three awful weeks waiting for results and find out that everything is normal.
Then in January I found out I was pregnant!! WooHoo, right? No, because I also found out that I had an enormous ovarian cyst that was highly irregular and needed to be removed surgically, big open scary surgery, not the cute dainty easy to recover from surgery. And I had to wait until I was 16 weeks pregnant to have the surgery. So, celebrating being pregnant when I knew that I was going to have a surgery that would endanger the baby was tough to do. But I had to have the surgery because that cyst was so weird.
Turns out the cyst was benign!! WooHoo!! Bad recovery, but still, I can deal because the baby made it.
And then last week the ob thinks I may have low amniotic fluid and I have to wait a week to have an amniocentesis. Long mother week of worry. Low fluid this early is really bad news.
While I am waiting for that awful 10 days, I get into a huge argument with one of the moms in our playgroup and that is also one of CJ's nursery school classmates. A mom that I thought that I was close friends. A mom that I see at least 4 times a week.
CJ was having a tantrum, she asked me if her kid could have the toy that the tantrum was about while I was trying to talk CJ down and I yelled at her for being ridiculous to ask at the moment. Well, she flipped out and started this whole diatribe about how awful I am and how she has spent months in agony trying to be part of the playgroup but how hard it has been because of me. How I insult her kid, over and over, how I am an awful parent because I have cursed in front of CJ on occasion, and all this other bad stuff. And she demands that I apologize to her for yelling at her and calling her ridiculous in front of another mom friend and the kid.
Thing is, this biznatch is moving out of state at the beginning of June, so I am all, I don't care, you are dead to me. But my friend that was there convinced me to be the bigger person and not let a 3 year friendship end that way.
So I send a message and apologize for speaking to her so rudely, I should have been more respectful of our friendship, yadda yadda, and that I would like to sit with her without the kids and work this out so we don't end our friendship so badly before she moves.
Well, she sent me an email thanking me for my apology and then explaining all the things that I have done to insult her and her kid. She never mentioned getting together and patching things up. She also sent paragraphs detailing all the ways that I have insulted her kid. She never apologized for how she talked to me or the things that she said in anger.
This has been so emotionally stressful, dealing with this crud from her while waiting to find out if my baby was going to live. And she knew what situation I was in.
Awful, awful past few months!
But.....
I went in for my amnio Friday and they checked my fluid levels and THEY ARE FINE!! THE BABY IS FINE!!! So they did the test and I am waiting results, but really have no fears about the results, the odds are like 1 in 6,000.
And, I found out........IT IS A GIRL! (Okay, that part scares the snot out of me, I am not a girl kind of person, but I will figure it out.)
Sorry for the rant, it just poured out before I could stop myself.
Re: Finally Good News!! (And a big long diatribe first, sorry.)
That does sound like a lot to deal with, especially in such a short period of time! Yikes!! And that friend of yours sounds reaaaally delightful too! Good for you for being the bigger person, but meh, if she wants to end things like that, that's her problem!
I am so happy to hear the baby is fine though. And how awesome that it's a girl! They're so much fun!!
Bubblegum Explosion
ooh crap...I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time lately. =( You're not the only one. I'm always dealing with some BS drama from people, but my solution is just to get you out of my life. I've decided, if you bring me down, then you aren't worth being around...see ya! I don't have time for people and don't really care what they think...and you shouldn't either.
Congrats again on your baby girl...don't worry...you'll be fine with her!
I am so sorry that you've had to deal with so much. Thats really alot to deal with and Im so glad for you that you came out on the other side of it, and all is well. So happy for you.
As for the friend, dont allow her to rent more space in your head honey. We as humans are always evolving and growing, and friendships ebb and flow. Accept the flow of her leaving your life and know its meant to be.
But in better news, CONGRATULATIONS on your baby girl on the way.
yay for a healthy baby!!!
Emerald Nuts Midnight Run (4m) 1/1/12
Coogan's Salsa, Blues, and Shamrocks Run (5k) 3/4/12
Colon Cancer Challenge (15k) 4/1/12
Purple Stride NYC (5k) 4/21/12
Run to Combat Autism (5k) 4/29/12
RnR Philadelphia (Half Marathon) 9/16/12
Thank you all! I appreciate your congratulations. I am so relieved that things finally took a positive direction.
I am trying not to stew about the situation with the other mom. It just was so incredibly awful that I apologized and she then went on with her laundry list and didn't say any sort of apology for the other things she said. But like you all said, she is gone in a couple of weeks and no point stressing about stupid people that add no value to your life.
Pokey, so sorry that you've had a rough patch of things. But, hey, it seems like you are finally on board the Karma Train. Yay for girls! All my friends say that it's kind of amazing how different girls are after having a boy, but that it's nice. And I am sure your little girl will kick ass in the same Pokey style of things.
As for the other mother, you said your piece... if she can't handle it, then let it all go. As you said, she's moving so there's not a lot of reason for you. FYI, I for one think that if my future potential child should be able to string together a sentence with a noun, verb, and subject utilizing a curse word by the age of at least 3. (Ask me about the shoelaces story sometime.)
Wow a lot of emotions for a week, especially being pregnant. I'm unfortunately not the one to ask with how to get along with difficult people. Congrats on the baby girl! You'll do great. I think girls are more versatile and have more options. I'll let you know in a few weeks.
That's a lot to be dealing with.
Congrats on a healthy baby girl!
Our New Home! Renovation Underway! The Law Nest
TTC Journey
7/2008 - begin TTC
7/2009 - began charting
9/2009 - Dx Endometriosis
10/2009 - HSG/SA (Normal)
12/2009 -6/2010 - Lupron #1 & 2
Sep-Nov 2010- Clomid Cycles #1&2 = BFN
Dec 2010 - Clomid Cycle #3 = BFP (1/11/11);no h/b (2/10/11); D&C (2/23/11)
5/11-6/11 - herbal tea regime = BFN
7/24/2011- herbal tea regime = surprise BFP
That sounds awful. Sorry that you have had to go through so much. I am not liking that lady too much. I have always found you to be nice and funny...so there. It seems like she just wants to blame, so I would probably distance myself. You extended the olive branch. I am very happy that you and the baby are doing well. And...don't worry too much about the little girl on the way...there are many types of girls not all of them require the princess stuff. That was what I was worried about too but I can't imagine having a boy now.
Congratulations on the baby girl! I am thrilled to hear that she is doing better. J I hope the next few months are smooth and happy for you and the fam.
Oh Pokey, what a long saga! Pregnancy stuff made me feel so helpless, so I can only imagine how you felt!
As far as the other mom, now that I have B., I have found that I absolutely do not have time or patience for drama in my adult relationships. I am a working mama with a kid who barely sleeps, and if I am going to have to work that hard for your friendship, frankly I just don't give a damn. A co-worker/mommy friend of mine has been a bit odd recently, basically giving me the silent treatment. She can bite me. I don't care.