Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
It's so funny...
how things look from the other side of a wedding...!
I'm co-hosting a shower for my cousin in honor of her wedding. It's a lingerie shower, and so I assumed that the guest list would be intimate in accordance with the intimate nature of the party, like 10 people tops, you know?
Well she sent me her guest list (as I requested) and it has 27 names on there, all local guests. I was shocked! I mean, I'm not poor, but I'm not rich, and a party of that size is not what I felt capable of throwing, (at least not of the quality I was aiming for) which is why I didn't offer to do the bridal shower, which is typically that size or even larger.
I guess I should have specified how many guests I was comfortable hosting, but I also just wouldn't expect someone to not even consider what they are asking someone to undertake when compiling a guest list. I was SUPER conscientious myself.
It'll be fine, and fun, and we're still going to throw it of course, and make it great. But at first I was like WhoaWhoaWhoa, that's an excessive amount of people to me for what is usually a really personal thing. I wished I had had recourse for this surprise number initially. I guess it's all relative; her wedding will prob have like 200 people there or more. But still, right?
Re: It's so funny...
Sounds like your cousin doesn't really understand the concept of showers too well, especially lingerie showers.
I know you weren't asking for advice, but is it too late to ask her to whittle down her guest list? At the same time, I never take those guests lists as a strict guideline. Maybe that's bad of me. I am of the opinion that the guest list is a list of people the bride would like to see invited, but nothing's set in stone, especially since I'm the one forking out the money. I've told brides (friends) point-blank that I couldn't accomodate that many guests and asked if they could knock some off the list, especially if there was so much overlap in guests to different showers.
Different strokes for different folks, but I'd be a little embarrassed to have that many people at a lingerie shower. And that's A LOT of underwear. I didn't have a lingerie shower, but my mother offered to buy me some before the wedding. I said no way.
At least if 27 people are invited, not all will accept the invitation probably. Even with cloes friends, I might not be comfortable buying them undies. You never know what guests will do! I'm sure your cousins closests friends/family will attend the shower. Good luck branz!
Do the creep.
Yeahhhh, you know I am sure I could technially say something, as it's my house my pocketbook. And now you mention it, I think the words she used when she emailed me were "preferred guest list" so maybe she never really intended that I ask everyone. But how would I discern who gets cut?
And it IS a lot of panties lol
I'm sure you're right....and me too!
My girls did that theme for my bach party and it was fantastic! I still have yet to use some of the 'gifts' that I received....including a few gift certs for La Senza.
I think I had about 15 people on my guest list, knowing that not everyone would attend (but I didn't want it to look like I was 'not including' certain people). There ended up being around 10 of us, which was perfect! Unfortunately my MOH wasn't even able to be there...but the rest of my girls were and that's what mattered!
Here's hoping that not everyone will be able to attend!
I love the way you put that!