We just received the invitation to a friend's wedding. They've been engaged for a hot second (two months?), and the wedding is in October. In Mexico. At an all-inclusive. To the tune of over $400 per night for the two of us.
Now, I know that we got married at Migis and it wasn't cheap to stay and all ($90 pp per night, breakfast included all days, dinner included FriSatSun thanks to us)...but that's still only $180 per couple each night. This is over $400 -- plus our airfare.
Never mind that I have to leave my kids -- while hopefully still nursing -- for four days/three nights...
MH is in the wedding and it's one of his dearest friends, so we have to go.
Here's the kicker: on their website they inform you that you're welcome to stay anywhere else, but if you do it will COST YOU $120 to attend their rehearsal dinner and $180 to attend their wedding reception!!!!!! WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!??! Has anyone ever heard of such a thing?????
Re: Are you kidding me???
That's a lot of money to expect people to pay. When DH and I got married I felt bad just for the fact that we had a few groomsmen that had to drive all the way from NY and one bridesmaid who had to fly from North Carolina.
DH and I rented a house for our entire wedding party and ourselves so none of them had to pay for a place to stay. Also we made sure it was stocked with beer, wine, snacks and food for breakfast each day.
I STILL felt guilty after doing all that for them, because they all still had to pay for gas or airfare (in the case of the bridesmaid and her fiance) and cover any other meals for the weekend (except rehearsal dinner and reception of course).
I couldn't imagine asking the entire wedding party to pay for airfare and that much each night to stay and then possibly having to pay for rehearsal dinner and reception. That's a lot to expect of people.
Jake blowing out the candle at Katie's coming home party
Katie Belle
Kristen, Chad, Jake, Katie & Sadie the Wonderdog, est. 6/17/06
This is a great idea - do you know anyone else going that you could rent a house with?
Jake blowing out the candle at Katie's coming home party
Katie Belle
Kristen, Chad, Jake, Katie & Sadie the Wonderdog, est. 6/17/06
Wow, paying to attend? Not sure about that! That is pretty nuts. I'm not sure renting a house would reduce the cost there that much.
One of my dearest friends just got married on her "home" island in the Caribbean... she lives there but grew up in MA. I tried and tried my best to go but in the end we couldn't afford it. Plane tickets alone were over $700 a piece and then staying at an AI for a few days would have put our whole trip over $2K. I love her to pieces but even one of her sisters couldn't make it. I was so devastated to not go but we couldn't spend that money either.
ITA. I can not even imagine. Wow, just wow.
This, it's included in the hotel stay so if you aren't there you have to pay. Ivay! Yeah, I think that would be one I'd skip and take them out to a lovely dinner when they got back. That blows!
All of the above, with emphasis on the tacky part.
Any chance DH can go and bunk up with a friend and you can just stay home? Mexico is nice and all I suppose, but the sour taste this celebration would leave would make it so not worth it.
I tell you one thing-- if I had to go and pay $400 each to go there, plus airfare, that couple could be sure that my attendance at their wedding was the only gift they were getting. And they had better like it!
That makes me want to puke.
That is insane!!!
I would seriously tell my DH to go on his own. There is NO WAY that I'd go to a wedding that I had to PAY to attend if I opted to stay somewhere more budget friendly.
DH and I went to PR for a wedding in April. It cost a fortune to go. And travel was a nightmare. But we stayed somewhere for $90 a night for the two of us and had most meals provided by the Bride and Groom during the weekend of the wedding. It cost us a fair amount, in the end, but the B&G knew that everyone who went had to pay a lot and tried to go out of their way to make it a good experience for everyone. The whole family (on our side) stayed in a compound together with a pool and everything. So it was like a family reunion. If they had done it at an AI, I know we wouldn't have been able to afford it and much more of the family wouldn't have gone either.
Wow, asking guests to foot the bill to the wedding and the rehearsal dinner (which is suppose to be a "thank you" for those in the wedding") is very rude.
I'm sorry that you were put in this situation.
So excited to meet Peanut this fall!
*Outdated* Wedding Bio
WTF!?! Seriously!! It sucks, but I too would probably send DH alone. I can't believe they would say you have to pay for the RD/Reception. That is craziness.
My cousin is getting married in Jan and I'm pretty bummed cause they decided on Hawaii. Her parents own a pretty fancy winery in CA and she didn't want it in CA because her father would invite too many people. DH and I have been dying to go to Hawaii, but at that time of year the tickets are running about $1K per person. Not to mention the hotel is like $200 a night. Luke would need his own ticket and my family is all going so there is no option to leave Luke with someone here (sorry couldn't handle leaving my kids with MIL). Plus its right after winter vacation, so no way I could get the days off of school, plus the 12 hour flight. So bummed, but there is no way in hella we could afford it. Its funny too, I love my cousins fiancee, but she isn't having bridesmaids cause she doesn't want anyone to have to pay the $$ for a dress, but everyone has to pay for a ticket to the island and the hotel.
I am a little confused about people and manners/ettiquette these days.
YES.
Sorry, but this couple seems bat shiit crazy in my book to expect so much out of their guests- I felt guilty that the place we had our wedding was $90/night per room, and that included two dinners and breakfast. Charging people to come to your RD/Wedding? Totally insane.
You should send them a bill for your airfare.
The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware; joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware. -Henry Miller
http://cookthehumbletable.blogspot.com/
what the what?? Yeah that's a load of crap.
We flew to Puerto Rico for dh's friend's wedding-he was the best man(losing our luggage along the way, the whole trip was a catastrophe) and were then informed that it was PR tradition that the best man PAY FOR THE WEDDING CAKE. I was all "bucka what?!?"
yeah - paying to attend if you don't stay there b/c the cost was included in the stay is like paying the pool fee to visit relatives at a campground you are not sleeping at, only a million times more tacky.
The invite - on a photo card, rsvp via FB
PLEASE go on vacation with us and we will get married while we're there. You are responsible for all expenses in this vacation including all food, drinks, entertainment, lodging, transport, and tips!!
We have a honeymoon registry that we would appreciate you contributing to so we can stay a week after the wedding, or cash is great too!!