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Dear...
BIL,
Although I thought that the email you sent tonight announcing your son's Christening was hilarious in its curt and strictly factual nature and its lack of invitation, I'm not sure how I should feel now.
You both talked about the importance of family when nephew was born, and since you obviously didn't choose us as the godparents, after discussing it with us, I'm kind of wondering who you did choose... and whether we should be insulted. Perhaps SIL's brother who is a bouncer a P Diddy's club in Atlanta would make an excellent role model? Or SIL's sister the welfare mom? Or maybe SIL's other sister the teenager? Maybe a lawyer and a political strategist weren't up to snuff compared to the pool of other applicants? H is the only married sibling between the two of them, and we're a little more stable than all of the aforementioned people.
Since he sent the email at like 11pm I know he did it on purpose. I just can't wait for the phone call one of us will field from MIL tomorrow. It is going to be fireworks of explosive anger.
Anyway, thanks for the heads up. I'll be at home on my couch waiting for that call tomorrow and attempting to recover from whatever is in my lungs, so at least this will give me something to do.
Love,
SIL and your really exceptionally angry brother
Stand up for something you believe in.
Re: Dear...
Oh, and SIL,
Regardless of your hippie nonsense parenting classes, sitting your child in the same room as the TV does not actually cause autism. Do some research, you've got 3 Ivy League degrees, I know you're smart enough. Austism is not caused by proximity to any sort of electronic device, and I'm pretty sure he's getting whatever "energy" you're worried about anyway since you use your iPad when you nurse him.
Trust me.
Stand up for something you believe in.
Dear new next-door neighbors,
It's lovely that your bedroom window is less than 12-feet from ours, but when you left last saturday for two weeks - it would have been nice had you turned your alarm clock off. Not that I don't love hearing it every.single.morning from 6:30 a.m. until I go to work...
Dear neighbors on the other half of our half-double,
Could you please NOT potty-train your completely naked two-year-old daughter on our shared porch, right outside our kitchen window? There's a room in your house for that and I don't really want to hear talking about their "poo poo in the potty" while I'm trying to enjoy my dinner.
Dear
Lowes delivery guys--Please bring me my dryer quickly. I've been awake for the last hour and I have a headache and I probably slept about 3 hours last night. I would like to go back to bed please.
Danny--please stop elbowing/kneeing me in the back. You always do this when you go to bed before me then you complain when I hog the covers. I have to hog the covers to cocoon myself against your boney extremities. You are the reason I only slept about 3 hours last night.
dear
diabetes- you were supposed to go away... you didnt I am pissed and your messing with my nerves. This is also messing with my milk supply
milk supply- please stay despite my stress. I promise I will relax soon.
Charlotte- please nap... its best for everyone involved that you sleep sometime during the day.
Dear Niners,
What the f*ck is going on here?? You're supposed to keep me entertained during the day, but now the board is slow and I'm being forced to ... *gasp* ... work! I don't like it.
Love,
MB
updated 10.03.12
agreed, it's been SO slow! Where is everyone?
Beth brought it to a grinding halt by picking me for interview of the day!
Boooo!!! I got picked the one day this week I was out of the office by 1pm and not home again until 11:30pm and then picked you on the day you have meetings. Not cool!
I know, that was a bummer cause it was kinda fun answering the questions. But what can we do? Our timing sucks!
My bad! I forgot you were going to be leaving early until after I picked you. It was still funs though, right?
And I'm still waiting for a pic of your new bag!
I am super glad you picked me
) Thank you!! It was definitely still fun.
Oh right! It's not very exciting. I was hoping the Outlet would have better tote-size options but they really didn't. However, everything was 50% off and then 30% off of that, so I got one anyway. It's big and brown with little brown "c"'s. I'll try to remember to snap a picture later!
I am limited on time online except for the iphone. I havent figured out how to post from my phone yet so for now I am stuck passing by a few times a day. Charlotte doesnt nap she is wired from the time she wakes up until the time she is winding down for bed. She will sleep if we are out... which makes me a total liar when it comes to saying she doesnt nap.
I promise I will be on more as we wind down on my maternity leave.
Go to Safari in your Settings and turn off Java.
updated 10.03.12
Or, click the hmtl button and open up a new little pop up (thanks ipad for all of your helpful mac-y learning curve).
Stand up for something you believe in.