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I feel kinda bad for H

 

That's normal right?


He doesn't seem to be taking this separation very well. I think he thought it would be a big party living with his friend without Aiden and I around but instead it is proving to be very lonely. Every time he talks to Aiden on the phone he starts crying. And since the 4th of July he keeps telling me how much he misses me and wants to start working on things so we can get back together eventually if it works out. I'm not against trying to work on things later on, but for now I just want to focus on Aiden and myself. H even texted me last night to say he wanted to go to Orlando one weekend in the next month or so with Aiden and me. This kinda bothers me bc he can't pay me child support until August but he is already trying to spend money on a weekend away. This was one of our issues, he has no concept of saving money. Ugh. This whole thing makes me feel so confused sometimes.


I love my crazy child!
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Re: I feel kinda bad for H

  • I don't have anything nice to say, so for once I'll shut my mouth.

    Are you on summer break right now?  Are you doing any fun things with Aiden?  Is he loving living at grandpa's? 

    imageimage
  • I'm sure it will be confusing for a long time, but at least you have your priorities in order. Just keep on doing what you're doing and everything will work out for you. Either he will get his mess together or he won't, but you and Aiden are going to be just fine.
  • Meh.

    Of course he is lonely. You aren't there to do everything for him. You, and he, need more than 10 days apart. (Sorry, I don't have much sympathy for him..he put himself in this situation).

    You don't have to go to Orlando have a wknd away. There are plenty of places locally that you could go - if he has to go away.

    http://lifeisbeachykeenblog.wordpress.com
  • I agree with all 3 PPs.  Yes, it is normal to feel confused but that is because at one point you did make the decision to marry him.  When those confusing moments come up just remind yourself why you made this decision and how much better off you and Aiden are and how much brighter your future is now.  And I definitely wouldn't go to Orlando with him (or anywhere else for that matter) on a trip.  There is no reason for it.  He had his chance.
  • imagenicoleg1982:

    I don't have anything nice to say, so for once I'll shut my mouth.

    Are you on summer break right now?  Are you doing any fun things with Aiden?  Is he loving living at grandpa's? 

    I wish I was on summer break! Next week I will be though! I see the light!

    I havn't had mush money to do anything too fun with Aiden but I did take him to go see Zookeeper yesterday 9thank you Visa giftcard lol). And we had an adventure at the McDonalds play place. I think he likes living here bc my dad has a yard for him to play in. lol


    I love my crazy child!
    image

    My Bio

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker college mom
  • He could make his own play-doh  http://www.instructables.com/id/How-to-Make-Playdough-Play-doh/  -- That's fun, right? lol.. I think it's fun.

    http://lifeisbeachykeenblog.wordpress.com
  • imageStingShark425:

    He could make his own play-doh  http://www.instructables.com/id/How-to-Make-Playdough-Play-doh/  -- That's fun, right? lol.. I think it's fun.

    My mom always made homemade play-doh for me! I loved it.

  • imageStingShark425:

    He could make his own play-doh  http://www.instructables.com/id/How-to-Make-Playdough-Play-doh/  -- That's fun, right? lol.. I think it's fun.

    Making play-doh is totally fun!  You can also make papier mache creatures using strips of newspaper dipped in a mixture of flour and water or glue and water.  Use inflated balloons, crumpled newspaper and plastic containers as a mold to give your creature shape until it dries.

  • I think you have the right idea about focusing on yourself and Aiden right now, Liz. In the meantime maybe you can get H to go into counseling or something. I'm not sure if you're still going, but maybe you two can eventually go together in the future. That is, if you want to work things out. I always feel sad when I hear people getting divorced even if it's for the best. The romantic in me tells me that you once loved that person enough to marry and spend the rest of your life with them so it's worth a shot to try. The realist in me tells me that sometimes people are in a toxic situation and are truly better off apart. Only you can decide what is best, but small steps are the way to go I think, in whatever direction you choose.

    I agree with pp about not going to Orlando anytime soon, just do something local. If you don't feel comfortable doing anything, then don't be afraid to tell him that. GL! We're always here for you!!

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  • I agree with all the pps too. That's great that you have your priorities in order. Don't rush into any decisions right now. Did you ever explain the living situation to Aiden? Does he say anything about his dad crying? Keep staying strong, you have so much going for you right now.
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  • I, too, agree with all the PP's - it's a situation he created. I can't imagine how confusing it is for you though. I'm glad that you're focused on yourself and Aiden - he needs to focus more on taking care of his soon too!
  • I know how you feel. This is probably a hard and confusing time for both of you. As you know, I left for 6 months and then went back for 6 months before leaving for good. Honestly, I should have never went back. Things got worse and I was thrown across the room (not saying that the same would happen to you) when I caught him cheating again and confronted him. 

    You have to hold your ground on what you believe is right, even if you feel lonely or he puts on the waterworks. 

     

     

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