Vent

katiebabie8686

I've had a really rough day today.

We are somewhat near the end of DH's submarine deployment. Things are hard because we cant communicate right now, at all.

My best friend came to visit me the past two days. Her DH is in the Army, and just moved to Korea (2 weeks ago). She is moving there to be with him in less than 2 weeks.

While I understand that yes, she misses him, complaining to me about it just doesn't seem right. Then this morning after complaining about feeling SO disconnected with him, she skypes him with me sitting right there.

I had to get up and leave the room because I started to cry. I just feel like she was being super insensitive. Of course, I didn't say anything.

Am I wrong for feeling like this?

MrsOjoButtons

She may be acting insensitively, but maybe she feels like you are too.

On one hand, she'll learn.  It's only a matter of time.  On the other hand, she doesn't stop being married and missing her own husband simply because yours has been gone longer.  It's not a pissing match.

katiebabie8686

Thanks for your reply. However, I never talked about it being a contest. I just meant I felt like she was being insensitive to do it in front of me, not that shes not allowed to miss him. 

 

NSL

She's your houseguest--where exactly is she supposed to go when she's missing him?

margotmacomber

You are being too sensitive.  PP's already covered it, but I just felt like saying it again.  I miss my H when he's gone for 2 weeks.  I missed him when he was deployed.  We missed each other when were both training in different locations for 6 months.  Why do you want her to be miserable (by not contacting her H in front of you) for the sake of your own misery?  That's unfriendly.

AlouetteBeans

MrsOjoButtons:

She may be acting insensitively, but maybe she feels like you are too.

On one hand, she'll learn.  It's only a matter of time.  On the other hand, she doesn't stop being married and missing her own husband simply because yours has been gone longer.  It's not a pissing match.

SoftSpot

You're the insensitive one, not her.

Smudges*Mom

I'm sorry that you are frustrated with your BFF, but I think you are either overreacting or over thinking this.

The first week or two when my DH left were of the more difficult for me. Settling into a new DH-less routine was a challenge. Your friend is doing that, traveling to see you AND getting ready to move to Korea. That is stressful and scary, IMO. Plus, your BFF likely feels that you understand how she is feeling because you're in a similar situation.

Focus on enjoying your BFF before she moves to the other side of the world. And, get yourself ready for your DH's homecoming!

Brandienee85

margotmacomber:

You are being too sensitive.  PP's already covered it, but I just felt like saying it again.  I miss my H when he's gone for 2 weeks.  I missed him when he was deployed.  We missed each other when were both training in different locations for 6 months.  Why do you want her to be miserable (by not contacting her H in front of you) for the sake of your own misery?  That's unfriendly.

I agree with this.

Just let it go. She isn't trying to rub anything in your face. Live and let live.