Going off BC

brie&drew

I'll be honest- I've been writing and then not posting this for days. I'm totally hung up on a conversation that Drew and I had two days ago. Like can't really focus on other things lind of hung up. Maybe TMI- but my sex drive is basically nonexistent. We were talking about it the other day because it is starting to be an issue- Drew's very physically affectionate and needs it in return- not necessarily sex all the time but at least cuddling and being close, and we're not really doing that very much either.

So we were thinking about things we could change that might make it better for both of us. (And let me totally AW my hubby for having a calm and rational conversation about a super-sensitive subject. Love him.) One thing we talked about was me going off BC. I've gained weight, which makes me feel less sexy, and it's really dropped my drive. We were planning on me going off at the end of the year anyway, so it's just bumping it up a bit and using condoms for a while to continue to prevent pregnancy. I expected him to be against it, but he's totally on board with it.

I'm sure I'm overanalyzing and stressing for no good or reason. We're driving into Cleveland today to visit Drew's family so we'll have a good 5 hours to talk more. I think we're going to try it, see if it helps at all. I know stress is a big factor for me as well, and that won't necessarily go away by going off the pill. But maybe it's a start. That and I think I actually need to plan time for things that will help me relax: working out more, maybe a massage or a pedicure.

That got really long, if you made it all the way, thank you! Am I worrying over nothing?

aleesh19

Sorry you are having those issues =( I know how you feel though. I went off bc looong before we were thinking about TTC because I had the same problem with the same hubby who needs physical affection in order to feel loved. It didn't solve things 100% but it definitely helped. Working out and taking time to relax will also be a big help too

PlumCallaLily

aleesh19:

Sorry you are having those issues =( I know how you feel though. I went off bc looong before we were thinking about TTC because I had the same problem with the same hubby who needs physical affection in order to feel loved. It didn't solve things 100% but it definitely helped. Working out and taking time to relax will also be a big help too

Everything Alicia said.

I know EXACTLY how you feel.  Although I do think BCPs REALLY messed me up, I now know that a lot of it has to do with my thyroid.  I did get a libido back after going off and was happier.  I will NEVER go back on BCP.

FutureMrsNAH

Ditto the other girls, I'm sorry you're dealing with this but love that you and Drew are talking about it and figuring out ways to resolve.

I will never go back on BCP again either. It was actually Nick who said he didn't ever want me to be on it again. It didn't make me gain weight but we think it affected my mood and it definitely affected libido (not that it is amazing off bcp) and then there's all kinds of other risks. We aren't thrilled to be using condoms but my health is more important. Hope it all works out! You're a busy lady so hopefully you do get to take more time for yourself!

PlumCallaLily

FutureMrsNAH:

Ditto the other girls, I'm sorry you're dealing with this but love that you and Drew are talking about it and figuring out ways to resolve.

I will never go back on BCP again either. It was actually Nick who said he didn't ever want me to be on it again. It didn't make me gain weight but we think it affected my mood and it definitely affected libido (not that it is amazing off bcp) and then there's all kinds of other risks. We aren't thrilled to be using condoms but my health is more important. Hope it all works out! You're a busy lady so hopefully you do get to take more time for yourself!

To make some light of the situation.....if y'all were infertile like me, you wouldn't need condoms   That is one positive, I suppose

ETA: Not that I wish that on anyone walking this earth.  Except maybe crackheads.  And whores.

shelley1002

I think going of BCP and finding time to help you relieve stress will be a big help.  It probably won't fix the problem 100% but it should help some.  Good luck.  Glad you have a DH who is willing to listen and have conversations about this in a calm and rational manner.

FutureMrsNAH

PlumCallaLily:

FutureMrsNAH:

Ditto the other girls, I'm sorry you're dealing with this but love that you and Drew are talking about it and figuring out ways to resolve.

I will never go back on BCP again either. It was actually Nick who said he didn't ever want me to be on it again. It didn't make me gain weight but we think it affected my mood and it definitely affected libido (not that it is amazing off bcp) and then there's all kinds of other risks. We aren't thrilled to be using condoms but my health is more important. Hope it all works out! You're a busy lady so hopefully you do get to take more time for yourself!

To make some light of the situation.....if y'all were infertile like me, you wouldn't need condoms   That is one positive, I suppose

ETA: Not that I wish that on anyone walking this earth.  Except maybe crackheads.  And whores.

Lol you're right .

And yes, definitely wish it on the whorebags.

Mitzzi23

Good for you! I have the same problem with a similar husband. We are too far out from TTC for me to feel comfortable going off. Good luck and let us know how today's conversation and the actual process goes.

moviesprincess

I think this is a good decision on your part. Like the other girls said, I was in the same boat as you and could not wait to go off of BCP. I think it really messed with my system and will never go back on them again. Goodluck!

mrsbaecker101108

I'm in the same boat as Mitz with it being too far out from TTC to seriously consider it.  But I cannot wait til we get closer so I can.  Though my BC does really help with regulating my mood and anxiety (PMDD).  But my sex drive has tanked.  I feel so bad for DH, between a low sex drive and living at my parents, it's really hard to get anywhere.  But we've both been putting in more effort recently since right now that's all we can do. 

I hope your talk go well today, and you are able to get a productive outcome.  Good Luck!

lolabright

I'm glad you and Drew able to have a good talk about this all. I hope everything works out for you and that you can start finding ways to relax more.

brie&drew

We talked about it in the car, and he's on baord 100%. I'm already so much more relaxed just having the decision made. Thanks for your input! It really helped me to know that not only have others dealt with this issue, but that a simple change can be a big step in the right direction.