Update on my Situation

ClaireDunphy

So I went to the new counselor last night & I really liked him. It was so much better of an experience than that wackadoo we had been seeing. I went on my own & he & I addressed a lot of my concerns.

Afterward, I called H & told him that I think we need to stop delaying the inevitable & get a divorce. He started heaving & throwing up.. on the phone with me. Not kidding. My immediate thought was, "Way to completely confirm why I want a divorce". Everything has just been so overly dramatic with him & I am so fuuking over it. He blurted out that he'd call me back & he did a few minutes later. He was calm, collected & actually quite agreeable.

He wants to get together this weekend to discuss logistics. I honestly don't really want to see him & since we suck at communicating, I'm going to email him today & suggest we do some of the sorting out via email... that way I'll at least have a paper trail if he starts to be a *** (which I don't think he will).

Thinking about our house makes me want to vomit, so I don't really want to talk about that.

Otherwise, I feel so much relief. I tried. I'm over it. We should've just went with in July, but I don't think we were ready. I was too overcome with guilt, but now I'm ready to be selfish & take care of my own needs.

Thank you all for being so supportive. I really appreciate it.

 

Oh & LLL? Thank you for your input the other day. It really hit home with me & helped me see the bigger picture clearly. I really appreciate your advice.

 

So.... Who wants to get wine?

gullterre

Oh I wish I could come get wine with you all and talk!  I think if I lived closer I could really have some good friends on my hands

CD, just so you know I really thing you did the right thing in getting counseling and trying to see if you could work things out.  At least now you can say that you tried everrrrything to save what you had.  I do not blame you for dreading the logistical stuff, especially the house, that will be a major PITA.  BUT hopefully you now have some peace that the decision is made and you are on your way to happiness again. 

PantsOffDanceOff

Best wishes for you to get through this difficult time.

luckyinlove11902

I'm glad you've found a counselor that you like. While this will be difficult, you are taking the steps necessary to be happy. I wish you the best.

jacmdb

Sorry things didn't work out but you know you made an effort and that is what matters. If my H wasn't working tonight I would love to join you for wine.

duncanpowers

The right counselor is such a major key to sorting out how you really feel and what you really need to do. I'm glad you're on the road you feel peace with.

+jennasue+

*hugs*

I'm so sorry you have to go through this, but happy for you now that you know what you need to do. I don't really know you but I'm always here if you need to talk (or need me to make you a print to cheer you up )

clseale13

I think being at peace with your decision is such a key thing in being able to be strong and move on from this. I think you're incredibly brave for putting in the work to figure out what was best for you and taking the steps that you need to take now that you've figured out what that is. You're going to be just fine and we're all here for you.

Kristin&Kelly09

I'm glad you were able to find a counselor you like and have made a decision you are at peace with. 

LoonyLunaLovegood

I'm glad I was able to help, don't hesitate to let me know if you need to talk more. It truly helps to talk to other people who have gone through this. I'm so glad you were able to find peace with your decision and know that you did everything you could before closing the door. I know that helped me a lot. My best advice now is to definitely stick with emails only. It helps keep everything recorded and also keep y'all from blowing up. Don't worry about anything you can't control, especially other's feelings about your business. Trust me, everyone will have something to say, I always just smiled, nodded, said thanks for thinking of me, and the vented or bitched about noisy people to my bff or my mom. Dont let anyone push you into doing anything your not ready to do or your not ready for yet. Take it one day at a time and you will be fine. ((insert big zombie hugs here))

MaryJaneWatz

Big hugs! I'm sure it's a relief to take control of your happiness.

dollfinn19

I'm sure this hasn't been an easy situation. You guys have clearly put so much effort into making it work. And it sounds like you have come to this decision having put a lot of thought and hard work into it. I think that's very admirable. Sometimes things just don't work out and though it is hard, you know you'll be better off for it. I wish you guys both the best. I'd totally meet you for wine if I weren't on the opposite end of the state! Hugs, CD! You're a strong lady and know in your heart this is right...cling to that on your sad days!

Mrs_W_Pookie

I know this has been a long path that you've come down and I hope that you will be happy as you move forward.  I'll have some sparkling cider with you.  I know that's not as much fun as wine though

mon.petit.chou

You know we're all here for you. And I have 15 bottles of wine ready to be uncorked tomorrow night, but it might be a bit of a drive for you

Temp103605875001677

I'm happy for you taking steps to make yourself happy. If DH wasn't teaching tonight, I would SO meet you for a bottle of wine, or glass, whatever.

navybaby1113

*Hugs*

You know how to get in touch if you ever want to talk.