July 2009 Weddings
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Please Diagnose My Party (vent)

Because it sucked... bad

We live on a range road, and so we're several Kl away from our nearest neighbours, and rarely see any of them unless our cows are out. This summer our cows were out more than normal, so I figured we would thank everyone and get to know some new people on the road with a neighbour night party.  

Instead of calling everyone which people would normally do (around here anyways) I made up really nice invitations and took Wyatt with me and went door to door inviting everyone out. Just about everyone said they were free that night and intended to come out, so I planned to feed about 30 people.

I spent the whole week fighting with Wyatt trying to find time to prepare the house for everyone coming out, and had Lance reschedule a mandatory course at work to stay home Friday to help out with Wyatt. I cooked a Turkey, stuffing, pyrogies and home made cranberry sauce, set up a kickass bar (complete with a pumpkin ice box for beer) and had my house perfectly spotless.

To make a really long story short, 10 people showed up and everyone was gone by 8:30. They pretty much came, made a mess eating and then left. We were really happy to see the people who came, but I couldn't believe that we had spent so much time and effort for a party that ended in less time than the average funeral luncheon.

Afterwards when we were left alone to clean up Lance just said 'well that fvcking sucked'... then we called his cousin and stayed up until 3am with him getting drunk (well not me, but they did).

has anyone else ever hosted a party like this and had success? I don't know what went wrong. 

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Re: Please Diagnose My Party (vent)

  • I'm so sorry, I don't have any advice. I'm still sad for you that it didn't work out like you had hoped it would! Sad (HUGS)
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  • That sucks! I don't know what you could have done differently. Sometimes it's just the dynamic of the crowd. What exactly did the invitations say? Did people maybe think it was just for dinner and were trying to get out of your way after?
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  • I'm so sorry! It's such a pain when you go through so much work and effort and things don't pan out the way you wanted them to. Could it have been the timing of the party? I know you said that everyone was gone by 8:30, are most of your neighbors farmers too? Is it possible they all go to bed really early because they have to get up really early? Clearly, you'd know more about this than me, but just a thought.
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  • What was the average age of the people?
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  • The average age (not including us) was about 35-40... but they were all people who we had seen party until 2am before (branding for instance). A couple people had young kids, which is why they left early. Lance and I are starting to think that maybe people just weren't in the mood to stay out late? I don't know, but I do know that I won't be quite so eager to host it again lol

    here is the invite I went around with:

      image

    ETA: this was the rough draft, when it was all done it said BYOB and 6pm instead of 7 

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  • Do the neighbors typically have parties together? If people don't know each other that well, they may have felt uncomfortable just stopping by. 

    Also, when I hear potluck dinner, I assume that I need to be bringing something for the meal. Maybe people got lazy and didn't want to cook so they skipped out? You could always try a different party that's just drinks and dessert. 

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  • 1.) it wasn't you

    2.) I think that by the time Friday came around, people usually just want to go home and veg. I know I do :S

    I find big dinners(where the people may not know each other well) usually work better when there is something to do to break the ice-Bunco/cards or something.

    I think neighborhood stuff always works better outdoors. They could have been intimidated by your awesome invite :) The women usually gather while the guys play washers or something.


    I would have come!

     

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  • reenie: I think you may very well be right. I never thought of it that way. Most parties out here are potluck, but next time I think I'll start the party later and just have drinks and snacks... maybe that will encourage people to stay longer?

    Cristin: Thanks for the suggestions! I should just host for all the nesties! lol... who wants to come aaaall the way up here for a party? lol  

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  • As someone else mentioned, Friday nights can be tough at the end of the work week. I know I am usually exhausted come Friday night. Maybe next time have it on a Saturday? And I agree on doing just snacks and dessert. I think someone else also mentioned this, but when there is something to do it also encourages people to stay longer, a sporting event on TV or a game of some sort?

    It definitely wasn't you. And if you are up for it and want to try again, I say go for it.

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