Starting Over
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
lenght of marriage?
How long were you "together"
How long were you married?
How long was it a good marriage?
me: 12 years, 7 years, & 1 year
Our marriage was really good for the first year then after our son was born StbX began to emotional check out, I kept thinking it would get better until the rapid decline this past year.
What about you?
Re: lenght of marriage?
3 years, 23 months, 3 months
ETA: He accused me of cheating before our plane touched down on our Honeymoon...that was probably the beginning of the abuse.
together 9 years
married 5 (well, technically 6. our divorce was final the week after our 6th wedding anniversary)
The first 2.5 years were good. Then his depression hit, and as I recently found out, he started cheating
How long were you "together" - 10 years with a few break ups in the first year of dating.
How long were you married? - 8.5 years
How long was it a good marriage? - Not sure it ever was. We had a lot of good times, but I always suspected he didn't really want to be married (even though he denied it), so I always felt like I was waiting on the other shoe to drop. He said he didn't believe in divorce, so I guess I just settled in for a life of knowing that he was never going to love me as much as I loved him. The "I don't believe in divorce" thing went away with the last affair he had - he totally believes in it now since it means that he can do as he pleases.
Together 9 years, married 3 1/2 years, the last one I'm not sure about... it probably depends on who you ask. We had a lot of happy years while dating, but once we were married I'd say we were pretty happy for a year, maybe a year and a half -- my ex checked out LONG before we were divorced.
At the end he actually told me "I've wanted a divorce for 2 years" - I was completely shocked as that was right around the time we decided to start trying to have a baby, so all that time I was taking my temp every day and we were having strategic sex, he wanted to leave me? Really?
How long were you "together" - Just shy of 4 years (including now...waiting on the divorce)
How long were you married? - we're still technically married, but by next Friday when the divorce is final, it will be just short of 2 years
How long was it a good marriage? - I don't know if it ever was....I thought things were one way, but as it turns out he had a girlfriend the entire marriage and from what I gather was flirty/inappropriate with her even before we were married.
11 years, 5.5 years, total of maybe 1 year off and on.
We had problems within the first month, but we just said it was stress, the hours I was working, etc. Boy was I wrong.
married 3 years.
together 6ish years including marraige
How long was it good? While we had "good moments", I'm not quite sure I can say we were happy for "X" amount of time. I think I kept waiting to get it off the ground and it just never really took off...
Together 15
Married 13
Good for about 10
Together: 5 years
Married: 2 years (one of those we were separated though)
We were never good. We had good moments that never added up to any amount of time. My xh and I are closer now that we are divorced than we ever were when we were married. We were always meant to be friends.
How long were you "together": 4 years
How long were you married? Just shy of 2 years
How long was it a good marriage? Probably for the first three months of it.
7 years
4 (we're actually still married, so it will probably be closer to 5 before the divorce is final)
1 (the sex was okay for one year before it went downhill, we got along well for the first 3 years or so though).
Together 4.5 years
Married 3 years (spent the entire 3rd year separated/getting divorced)
1 year of "good" marriage
How long were you "together"? 9 years
How long were you married? 2 years
How long was it a good marriage? it was never good. The alcohol and drug abuse has always been present but after a 4 year hiatus of not drinking but still smoking marijuana, H's dad died and the slow progression started soon thereafter. About several months before we got married, I noticed it happening almost every night and it never stopped - it would slow down on occasions but as soon as an argument or a disagreement would start, he would go straight to the bottle instead of dealing wih the issue. We've been though 1 1/2 years of counseling and nothing has changed...I'm moving out of our house on Dec. 3. *sigh*
How long were you "together" 9 years
How long were you married? 6 years
How long was it a good marriage? 3+ years
Together: 6 yrs
Married: 2.5 (including the year we spent seperated)
Good marriage: 8 months?
Together 7 years
Married 4 years, but lived together for less than half of that time because he was in and out of jail, including spending the majority of my pregnancy in jail, and the last year we were separated.
Good? The first 2 years of marriage, then the OW was much more fun to be with as she stroked his ego and didn't "nag" him about getting a job, tell him to stop spending money we didn't have, to stop driving without a drivers license, blah blah. Ironic that he wanted the pregnancy test to be positive even more than I did each month we were trying, all the while he led his double life. Looking back, the entire relationship was incredibly emotionally abusive. Hindsight is 20/20.
How long were you "together" 6 years
How long were you married? 5 years
How long was it a good marriage? Um, 0? I was one of those girls who knew exactly what kind of hell I was getting myself into, but got married anyway because I was going to prove everyone wrong about XH.
Together- almost 3 years
Married- 7.5 months before separation, technically 2 years total (most of which we were going through divorce)
Good- Well, I thought is was pretty good until he was arrested. Of course I see things now that I would never stand for today. Overall though I was pretty happy.
Now I know that a lot of this was a lie. I was part of his "normal front". A game piece to throw people off and make it seem like he was a family man. My therapist says it is most likely that he did love me and want to be the person he pretended to be... but he was to sick to be that person.
This is fitting for today since it would be my anniversary lol
Together 8 years
Married for 3 1/2
How long was it a good marriage? Um, never I knew when I got married it wasnt right...but we had a baby and a house..it was what we were supposed to do
Ditto to this: "I was one of those girls who knew exactly what kind of hell I was getting myself into, but got married anyway because I was going to prove everyone wrong about XH".
Together 7 years pretty much on the nose.
Technically married for 2 years 11 months.
Good 2 months, I clearly remember that day I noticed a change but couldn't understand why. Although it was actually a very slow drawn out downhill path to making the decision to divorce (2 1/2 years later).
Ugh. Me too. WHY do we do this?
Together= 26 years
Married = 24 years
Good = in retrospect never. I was also the original I can save you and prove everyone wrong. I only wanted to be a wife and mother. If I did everything perfect it would work. It worked for me okay until the kids grew up and I had nothing left but a mean husband that took me for granted.
Together: a little over 4 years.
Married: Separated after 16 months. The divorce almost took a year to finalize, though.
Good marriage: For almost a year until he changed employers, then things went downhill pretty quickly.
ETA: Although, when I say "good" it was definitely nothing to brag about, in any way shape or form.
They see us rollin'...they be hatin'.
Together for 6 years
Married for 3 years
I would say maybe the first year of marriage was "good". Although long after the divorce I heard rumors about him cheating on me before we were even married so who knows....
3/12 5 mi -- 49:22 Pace: 9:52
5/1 Half Marathon -- 2:11:22 Pace: 10:01
5/22 10k -- 56:29 Pace: 9:00
5/24 3.6 -- 29:03 Pace: 8:18
7/10 15k -- 1:44:46 injured Pace: 11:14
10/29 5k -- 28:24 Pace: 9:04
How long were you "together" Together 16years
How long were you married? Married 13years
How long was it a good marriage? I thought it was good but he had been a compulsive cheater the entire marriage and even before. The first time I found out was after being married for 3years. He was an amazing con hence my taking him back, even became an ordained Minister to hide his other life, it was pretty sick. I checked out 2 years before we split when he had an affair with our babysitter and best friends daughter. At that point I didnt care anymore and was just there so we could pay the bills.
Together for 6
Married for 1 year, 3 months
Good? Not good from 2 days before the wedding, to about a month after (He did some really awful things at his Bachelor party). Then it got better for a few months, but was in a complete downward spiral by Christmas. Our divorce was final in June.
Together: Feb 2003-July 2011 - 8 1/2 years
Married: Oct 2007-July 2011 when I left (divorce not final yet) almost 4 years
Good marriage: Up until Spring 2009 when I talked to him about having a baby. All down-hill from there. First time he put his hands on me in 2004 I should have listened to my gut! Grrr...