Trouble in Paradise
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
What's the TIP advice for divorcing a cheater?
I'm a regular on the bump, lurker (but ocassional poster) on TIP and other TN boards.
My FIL announced this week that he has a five year old child with another woman. I feel like we've fallen into bizzaro land. MIL and FIL have significant assets - an inheritance from her parents. FIL has left their home and is now residing with his SO. MIL is in shock.
So what's the drill? Call a divorce attorney, stay in the house and what to do about the $? I think she can safely move half out of their savings account right?
Sorry, I'm not really thinking too straight. My family is the messed up one, not DH's family. This is so messed up.
Thank you!
Re: What's the TIP advice for divorcing a cheater?
She needs to get a lawyer, like now. Did she have a pre-nup?
No to checking the accounts (although I told H to have her do that ASAP) and to the prenup. They had nothing when they married 30+ years ago but her parents house was sold at the height of the market in a ridiculously HCOL area so that was the inheritance. Totally not anticipated and I'm worried that since it happened so late into their marriage that it'll be considered community property.
The craziest part is that my H thinks he dad doesn't even have a debit card. Apparently MIL handles all the finances. I don't know. Hard to imagine him pulling the whole second family bit for so long without money somewhere.
Hmmm, not necessarily. It depends on the laws in your state. She definitely needs to call the bank and credit card companies to freeze the accounts. Oh, and run a credit check on herself.
When she inherits doesn't have anything to do about if it becomes community property. If she inherited the money and kept it in an account in her name only he would have no claim on it but probably she comingled it with joint assets. If that is the case he would be able to claim half of it most likely. I would definitely have her call a good lawyer ASAP. She needs to talk to a lawyer before she does anything with the money otherwise she could hurt her case. Most divorce lawyers can get you in super fast since they know they need to be very proactive.
She should be calling the lawyer to line up protection for her assets, if nothing more. And sooner rather than later.