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Quilt Trouble.
My mother-in-law is too sweet, and she loves me too.
To cut to the chase, she is making us a quilt (a wedding present). She'll be done by Thanksgiving, and we thought it was very thoughtful.
We are getting extremely strong hints now that she wants us to have it as our bed spread. (ie "you should start picking out your color palate for your room"). From what I've seen of it, it's best used as a "keep warm blanket when needed", not something I would have on any bed in any room, with any color palate.
This is something my H feels he should handle, but he doesn't know what to say! We already have a whole bed set we bought with some wedding money, and there is no way we are going to toss all that to the side (that got pricey..).
H suggested putting it on our bed when they are here..
What do we say, and how do we keep the peace?!
Re: Quilt Trouble.
H suggested putting it on our bed when they are here..
This seems like the simplest solution.
Thank her for the quilt and then use it (or don't) as you want. She'll get the message in the end. And BTW, no one has to "deal" with it at all (your H doesn't have to call, IMO). Just use it as you want to use it and don't make it into a big deal.
And when she throws out her redecorating comments, change the subject.
I don't see any reason why your H has to handle anything. When you get the quilt, say 'Thank you!' and leave it at that. If you feel that you have to specifically tell her you will not be using it as a bedspread I think 'Thank you- this is perfect for us to snuggle under on the couch' is a fine response. And if she presses you to use it as a bedspread, just tell her what you told us- you spent a lot of money on bedding and would prefer to use the quilt in another way.
An American Girl's Travels
She can assume whatever she wants but since it's a gift to you its up to you and DH to do with it what you want. not her. if she comes over and asks why it's not on the bed tell her the truth. 'we love the quilt and keep it over here because we like to use it while watchign tv, reading, etc...' how much you spent on a bedding set (in my mind) has no bearing on why you dont want to put it on your bed-what IS important is that you like the bedding you have on your bed and aren't going to change it. the most important thing to express to her is how much you appreciate all of the time and effort she put in and how much you love seeing it on the couch/chair etc.. and how you love to curl up in it on a chilly night.
My mom has a quilt that her MIL (dad's mom) made for her, she hangs it on the back of her chair. She sits in this chair in the evenings when she is reading or watching tv. She told me that she wasn't a huge fan at first but she says that over time she loves it. (it was a gift for their bed spread as well)
We were discussing this when my MIL was asking about bedroom color for a quilt that she wanted to make us, and I wasn't that happy about it. My MIL is not a crafty person at all and decided that her time was better spent doing somwething else then making us a quilt. lol.
I don't think that your H needs to say anything. Plan your bedroom the way that fits your taste and use the quilt however you want to use it. I wouldn't even go through the trouble of putting it out when she comes over. If she notices that you aren't using it for your bedspread just tell her "it's great to snuggle up with on the couch when we are watching tv" or whatever. If she brings it up in the meantime just tell her that it was nice of her to take the time to make it and you're looking forward to seeing the final product or just change the subject.
I don't think that I would want something that reminded me of my MIL on the bed that my H and I share... but that could just be me.
Is it pretty enough to hang? My mom has a quilt that is actually used as a wall hanging, not on the bed.
You might also consider buying a quilt rack and putting the quilt on the rack. That way it is on display, and you can use it when it is extra cold, instead of keeping it in the closet.