Trouble in Paradise
hindsight's_a_biotch
member
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Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Trista - I'm lazy
And I missed out on that thread from the ground floor so you can come over here and indulge my laziness.
Did he flat out tell you he no longer wanted to sleep with you? Please tell the exact phrase he used.
And what exactly did he say about your legs hurting after the hike or whatever it was you were doing?
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Re: Trista - I'm lazy
I can't relate. We're a joking family and most people run backwards so they can maintain conversation and encourage you. I need some expounding here. I want to know what the jokes were exactly.
Because there's a difference between whew, you're getting really winded. We're gonna have to get you an inhaler if you're gonna make it and OMG, look at this fat ass trying to run, keep it up, thunder thighs!
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What was said was. I've lost my sexual desire. I asked why. He said I'm just not attracted to you anymore. Everytime I think about you I think about when is it going to end, when will you stop putting on weight. I asked him if he was disgusted by me and he didn't reply.
We took a bike ride on Sunday with the boys, the youngest is 6. We have a bike trail by where we just moved and we biked down the road to the trail that we had never been on. We went pretty far down the trail and I was fine and talked about what a beautiful day it was the whole time. We went further and I suggested that we turn around and start heading back. We did, When we got to the road it was all uphill from there. He went further ahead with the oldest, but the youngest was struggling so I stayed back with him. The youngest was telling me how hard it was to get up the big hill and I joked that we would take a taxi next time. When we got to the house everyone was hurting and complaining. I said "man my legs hurt." That is it. I went about trying to set up my studio while they rested on the couch. Then they went out to play kickball (which I normally do play) and I didn't go because I was trying to get my office set up so I could start booking clients again.
Yesterday when we were arguing he brought up how he wants to be able to do all this stuff but I always complain. He brought up the bike ride. Even that I wanted to turn around, until I pointed out that we had a six year old that had to make it back to the house. Really this was the part that pissed me off, because he talks about wanting to do all this stuff to help me get in better shape, but I am out of shape, so I'm not going to act like it was the most fun I have ever had, The point should be that I am doing it and making an effort.
We are a jokey family too, but he knows that it was upsetting me. I don't even know specifically what he was saying now, but it really pissed me off.
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Any man who says, everytime I think about you, I wonder when you'll stop getting fat and then I don't want to fuuk you is a jerk. No two ways about.
So I'm team Pedantic.
YWIA!
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I'm wondering if you are just so down on yourself that you see any comment about physical activity and weight as someone insulting you. I'm not saying that what your husband said was right, but it seems like you take a lot out of context and turn it around to be a negative jab toward you.
Is it possible that you DO complain a lot and it's sucking the fun out of going for a bike ride because your husband knows it's going to be a complainfest when you get home so he just beats you to the punch with his comments?
I guess I don't know because as well as these activities being "fun" they are suppose to be "helping" me get healthy. So basically, he is taking his overweight out of shape wife on "activities" that are suppose to be getting me in shape. So even if I complain a lot (which I don't think I am at all), I'm doing it and he should be seeing that as a step in the right direction.
You know, you are pretty lucky that your husband is encouraging you to do physical things by doing them with you! Let's go for a bike ride, let's go for a hike, let's play some kickball is 100X better than suggesting someone go to the gym or get on the treadmill.
He seems like he is trying to encourage you by modeling some healthy activity, not to mention having the enjoyment of sharing that time together.
That is why I was saying he really isn't a bad guy. Just said the wrong things and really pushed my buttons.
Really? lol this is a comical response. She's lucky her H is a douche. ooookay.
Yeah, her husband is being a total douche by inviting her to do active things. What is he thinking?
Well, considering she said last time her husband invited and she participated it ended with "...The while time he was mocking me by running backwards and making jokes about how I am so out of shape, does that sound like an enjoyable experience to you?"
I'm going w/ the idea that inviting her along isn't helping.