September 2009 Weddings
Dear Community,
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Our tech team has launched updates to The Nest today. As a result of these updates, members of the Nest Community will need to change their password in order to continue participating in the community. In addition, The Nest community member's avatars will be replaced with generic default avatars. If you wish to revert to your original avatar, you will need to re-upload it via The Nest.
If you have questions about this, please email help@theknot.com.
Thank you.
Note: This only affects The Nest's community members and will not affect members on The Bump or The Knot.
Biggest Differences?
The marriage is hard poll got me thinking. What are the biggest differences between you and your DH? Besides things like interest/hobbies, what are your fundamental differences?
Re: Biggest Differences?
One of the biggest things is that he's content to stay in the house all weekend long and just sit, whereas I need to be doing things and crave human interaction, even if it is shopping alone and store clerks.
Relatedly, I am a go go go person- I want to finish things before relaxing and he can just stop at any time. We're getting better at compromising on this.
Stand up for something you believe in.
The biggest one and the one that causes us the most problems: When mad, I don't talk. Robin, however, says everything that crosses his mind.... then apologizes later.
Other things:
He wants to keep EVERYTHING. I want to throw everything away.
I'm much more of an extrovert than he is.
He thinks he's a gangsta, and I still act like a school girl.
ETA: I thought of more:
I like to plan. He procrastinates about everything. (Like he can't for the life of him figure out why you'd want to do Christmas shopping before like Dec 20th.)
He also likes to stay home, and I like to go places.
I'm the type that can sit on the couch all weekend and watch movies but Ryan needs to get up and do something. Most of the time he wants/needs to hang out with people, which I'm fine with, sometimes not every weekend. So we are trying to compromise on that lately.
If I'm in a bad mood I like to be left alone and not talk while Ryan likes to talk things out.
I like to be on a timeline and he is more go with the flow
He is okay with messes. I am not.
I like to have vegetables with my meals. he does not.
He likes to play video games. I do not.
I am a worrier. He is not.
Otherwise we're a lot alike in that we have the same dry sense of humor, we like the same music and tv shows (except that I like country music and he does not), we like the same activities.
I am super tidy and organized - Josh, not so much.
I always worry about money - Josh doesn't.
Josh gets tired of things very quickly, like his car, our tv, etc. and wants to replace them faster than I would ever dream of.
He likes to do things last minute - I can't stand that!
My clothes last me forever, Josh manages to destroy his the first time he wears them:)
I keep things forever and rarely loose anything - Josh looses things quite often!
Josh is much more of a people person than I am. He can get along and have a conversation with pretty much anyone.
Josh is an expert at traveling...directions, driving, airports...you name it. I'm terrible with that stuff.
He's laid back, I'm not at all.
I'm sure I could keep going!
<a href="http://s65.photobucket.com/albums/h205/adia83/?action=view
These too.
Also, he freaks out if he has under a certain $$ in the bank, even if we have plenty of money in savings. Super weird to me, not bc I like to spend all of my $$ but because it isn't that big of a deal to have $400 in the bank the day before pay day.
Stand up for something you believe in.
I am a planner. He likes to fly by the seat of his pants.
I'm a spender. He's a saver.
He doesn't mind messes. I'd rather clean them.
ETA: Another --
I like making plans and I don't mind being busy. He would be more comfortable at home without any obligations or human interaction.
updated 10.03.12
These too. I don't know how he destroys clothes so fast. Every pair of pj pants he owns have a hole in them somewhere. I bought him a new pair for our anni. Already have a hole. (shakes head) He'll take clothes out of the dryer and they have these mystery stains all over them. He says "our detergent sucks." Really, because my clothes never have stains like that..... also PRETREAT!
He's always on his own timeline. I call it "Scott Time." He has absolutely no concept of time. He says "I'm getting ready to leave work," which means to me, "I'm packing up now, leaving in like 5 minutes." Scott Time, that means "I'll be here another 20 minutes or so." He's late to EVERYTHING because he thinks he can shower and get ready in like 10 minutes and that it takes only 15 minutes to get anywhere.
He's a spender. I'm a saver. He can look at the amount in the checking account and think we have all this extra money, with no concept of our mortgage payment coming out next month. He sees it in there, and thinks it's there to spend.
He's way more laid back than me. He can be anal about certain things, but I'm way more of a planner than he is. Although he's made me way more laid back over the years.
This is our big one. We've had to learn how to find some common ground communicating when we're upset. I'd say he's made a lot more progress there then I have.
Other things:
He's a lot more social than I am. And I mean that in an all encompassing way. He likes to go out more, he's more easy going, he's less awkward...all of that. It's good though because he can usually compensate for my lack of social skills.
He loves mountains, I love the beach. (I like the mountains, too, but I love the beach more.)
He prefers non-fiction books. I prefer fiction. (It's a big deal to me!)
ETA: When we are on the same schedule: He likes to wake up early, and I like to sleep in. But currently this works for us because waking up early for him means 11AM or noon.
This exactly esp. after the baby. After Nate's asleep I have a choice work out OR clean. I almost always pick working out.
Besides him being a neat freak we also differ with the way we seejudge people. I am extremely picky with who I let into my life and I tend to be pretty good at reading peoplepicking up on bad vibes, K tends to be TERRIBLE at reading people and always ends up befriending the scum bags who he at first glance thought were good people with bad decision making skills.
I am a planner and Jay goes with the flow; along those same lines I'm late if I get somewhere on time and he ends up everywhere 15 minutes late (unless I lie about what time to be there!).
I like to keep things tidy and do things a little bit at a time (clean bathrooms one day, do laundry over the weekend, etc...) while Jay would just let everything build up until people are coming over and do everything in a rush.
Jay is very into politics and feels it's his duty to inform people about certain issues/facts when he feels they are mis-informed; I think that if people want to be misinformed they will be and that those are not things for me to worry about because that's why I vote for elected officials (I do my research on candidates before I vote!)
We laugh that the theme song to our relationship is Paula Abdul/DJ Skat Kat's "Opposites Attract" because it pretty much is us to a tee.