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Back and feeling blessed
Phew, I am back from Texas ya'll. We had a wonderful time visiting with our family and friends, but at the end DH and I were so thankful to be getting on the plane and heading back to our life in Belgium - together ALONE - haha.
It is totally normal for our US visits to be jam packed with forced family fun, but this time was unique. Weddings are a very stressful time and things were crazy! Somehow everything got done, the wedding was beautiful and went off without a hitch! My sister was a beautiful bride and looked very very happy 
I am excited about my new brother-in-law, he is a great guy. My MOH toast went great, and even though my hand was shaking a bit - my voice held strong so I don't think you will be able to tell I am really nervous in the wedding video.
DH and I found through out the whole visit that we preferred to be on our own. We love hanging out with the family and visiting, but we had a hard time imagining seeing them all the time now that we've been so far away for 3 years. I'm glad for this revelation - it helps me feel a little bit more grateful for our time here and less rushed to get home.
My parents new house in Texas was perfect for them. I think they will be very happy there. As a state though, I did not find Texas all that appealing and I did not feel a strong desire to follow them there - which is good. I think I will be content to visit for some time in the summer and holidays. I'm sure my kids will enjoy having a place to go visit too.
The newest revelation we had was that we are not as interested in living near my MIL as I thought. DH had a hard time on this visit bc it was just the two of them most of the time I was running around doing wedding stuff. I doubt living by her all the time would be as intense as this visit was for him, but I think he honestly would prefer being far away from her. He was like "she would want to come over all the time!" We do love VA, and most likely would go back there to start - but we might move to another state someday. MIL will be a great grandma and I always pictured being able to just drop the kids off with her anytime, but DH is right - she is one of those people that revolves her whole life around her kid. That's a lot of pressure for DH. It's easier just to have the face time during visits instead.
DH had an awesome time in CO Springs with his Dad on this visit. He only stayed a long weekend but he was impressed with the atmosphere and the pretty mountain views. I am opening my mind to the idea that we might move to Denver or somewhere someday. I originally thought of all the grandparents to pick, we shouldn't move by FIL since he is so independent, but I think it would be ok. We just have to realize we won't have easy access to a family babysitter - so we will have to find another resource.
All of you with kids, how do you go on date nights - or get away for the weekend - if there is no family nearby to leave your kids with? Do you find babysitters/family friends you can trust?
We're headed to the Maldives on Christmas Eve!
Re: Back and feeling blessed
I'm so glad to hear your trip went well! Family visits can definitely be intense, especially if there's a wedding involved.
As to your question, we're pretty bad about going on date nights because I'm still a little too paranoid about leaving DD with anyone and we don't have family in the area. I think when we come back from our Christmas trip to the US it'll be time to find a babysitter for occasional evenings out. DH is getting impatient about "us time," and he's right.
Where are you from again? I forgot. Your hate for my favorite place on Earth rubs me wrong. I'm probably taking it too personally, but yea.
We take W on our "date nights" and weekend getaways. We had a friend watch him one night when we had guests in town, but that's the only time we've left him with anyone other than family.
Haha, this. No love for Texas? Them's fightin' words
j/k...sorta
All that aside, I agree with you on the being on your own with DH. We love our family time too but it is so nice to be back in our own home after visiting with all of the family! It sounds like you had a good time with your family though!
Travel Blog
Little Miss Lulu playing on the beach
Haha sorry I did not realize there were so many Texas lovers on the board ;-)
I am from Northern VA, so for me Texas seemed a little flat (from above in the plane). I stayed in the Austin/Pflugerville area and mostly saw lots and lots of interstate between the two places - did not get much time to visit lakes or any pretty scenery.
I guess I was just expecting more from a place that made my loyal VA parents up and move (sorry this is NOT Texas' fault). Also, with the drought all the grass was brown and dry. The wedding venue for my sister's out door wedding I was expecting to be green and pretty (as it was when she fell in love with it in springtime) but the area was brown grass, dirt piles and half leafless trees. I think it was a little bit late in the fall for the area to be pretty. She spiced it up with some bright colored lanterns in the trees and a white aisle runner. It was nice, but I guess just not what I was expecting.
Austin, the city, was awesome though! Lots of Texas love for 6th street! haha
And I could not get enough of the Tex Mex
We're headed to the Maldives on Christmas Eve!
I've been to England for three months at a time. At first I thought it would be really hard to be away from my family (I still live with my parents, actually) but I found out it was a lot easier than I thought. I haven't made the move yet, though, so I guess I'll find out lol
Glad you enjoyed your trip though!
Rambley Blog
I'm not expecting everyone to love Texas. The part that annoyed me the most is that you judged the whole state by one area that you were in. You were in the Hill Country and it was flat. That's ironic.
ETA: I'm easily annoyed right now, though. Sorry. *steps away from the computer*
Welcome back! I'm glad everything went well with the wedding and the toast. It seems your toast went better than mine (I'm definitely glad mine wasn't video taped!).
Are you planning on moving back to the states soon? or are you just looking at possible places for the future? (just curious) I can understand how hard it must be with your family spread out across the country like that. Do your siblings live close to your parents'? If I could choose, I would live close to my sisters rather than my parents (they don't seem to intrude as much as parents, hehehe).
Aww, you were even in the Austin area?! That's the best city in Texas, for sure..sorry, I'm biased. There ARE actually hills and stuff there though, haha, a lot of Californians move there b/c it apparently reminds them of SF or something. As for the brown, they haven't had any rain since about April, except for maybe a few weeks ago. We're having to rip out our lawn eventually b/c the grass is totally dead. Blah. Don't worry, I understand though, Texas is kinda flat..hehe.
Travel Blog
Little Miss Lulu playing on the beach
I'll just stick with living in CO....
Anyway, All my family is in the Netherlands. My IL are in Denver (about 100 miles north of us) so not too far but they are old (because we are old....) and not really kid people. I mean they love their grandkids but don't do well with being around them for prolonged periods of time until they are older. So we do not have any built in baby-sitters like a lot of other people. Honestly, it does not bother me too much. Occasionally it would be nice to have someone close by that you could drop a kid of with little notice but most of the time we are both perfectly fine not having the family interference. From bumping a fair amount there are a lot of people that have family near by but that can also be a drawback, grandparents bugging you to get a certain amount of kid time and having a kiddo overnight when they are barely out of the womb.....I am actually very thankful that I did not have to worry about having any family over after I had DD. My sister came for a week when she was a month old and she was very helpful and content just hanging out. I honestly do not think I could have handled having my parents stay with us after having DD. I would have had to entertain them and who wants to do that with a newborn.
Since we are so "old" (I am 39 and DH is 49) it is not like we like to go party on the weekends. At this point DD is 18 months old and we have been out with just the 2 of us for dinner 4 or 5 times since she was born. That said though we go out with her a lot. We travel a bunch and she has been a great traveler. And so far she is usually a good sport with dining out as long as it isn't too late.
We do have a baby sitter who actually watches the nieces when we leave town (we go visit the stepkids back east a lot and our once a year Europe trip to see my family) and she stays at our house (she is one of our nurses at work so very thrustworthy and she is very grandma like). She will also watch DD when needed. Part of the reason I am not willing to go out by ourselves a lot is that I am still nursing DD. I do have a freezer full of milk but I do not want to worry about pumping etc. when out for extended periods of time.
Most of the people I feel comfortable babysitting DD work so it makes it hard if I need to do anything during the weekdays. She goes to daycare 3 mornings a week when I work but they don't always have drop in availability due to being at full capacity. This has not really been an issue except for once recently when I had to do training for work on my off day.
Long story short.....yes it would be nice to have someone to use as a (free) babysitter whenever needed, but for the most part it does not really bother me that we don't have family near by. I love my family but I am actually glad I don't live anywhere near them. Maybe that is bad but our family just isn't that close. My parents would like it if we were closer now that we have a DD but that just isn't going to happen. I guess we just like to do our own thing without having to worry about pleasing the rest of the family. My IL love seeing us every few weeks for a few hours but they are also busy with their own lives and aren't sitting around waiting for the grandkids to show up.
OK that was a bit of a novel but there you go. I am sure that wherever you will end up you will be able to find a reliable babysitter. My friend uses a local college girl who is great with her son and available most of the time. I am sure with word of mouth you would fine a few (if not many) good options.
I think thats how most of my recent trips have been like, the revelation that I miss my family from afar but when Im that close to them for a given amount of time, I don't miss them that much.
To answer your question, we have done a poor job of finding a babysitter and going on dates. The last time we went on a date was Valentines Day. How sad?! We have offers all the time from the ladies that work with DH. So I just need to force myself to pick a date.
Love Texas too! But I do miss the seasons. DH has an opportunity in Greenville, SC. I like it there too, but our family is in TX.
As for being close, I was pretty close with my family, but I'm not one to get into drama. I'm known as the family memeber who disappears for a year or two every few years and then comes home. When I had DS though, my family and I got much closer. I lived in Houston and them Dallas, my mom came in pretty much every weekend and one of my aunts would join her. If me and DH wanted to get away we had a huge pool of family ready to take DS. WE MISS THAT! We just went to Paris with DS and would love to have had time to ourselves. We are going to Germany and taking a sitter with us. For date nights we have 2 sitters here we use, but everything has to be planned out, and we like impromtu.
lol.